Diary of a secret crush: Unrequited Love:COMPLETE!
by Delima Rose
Summary: New in town, new school, new faces, Bella is the new girl, and nobody seems to like her. Then she spots Edward Cullen on her first day. Hot, smirky, and messy haired Edward. It's love at first sight! But he doesnt seem to realize that she exist! ALL HUMAn
1. Chapter 1

_**Disclaimer: **__I do not own any of these characters. Stephanie Meyer owns them :0)_

_R&R!!_

_**Diary of a secret crush: Unrequited Love**_

_**At first sight**_

_**Diary one: Forks, Washington  
**_

_**Day one **_

I ate at the far end of the cafeteria eating by myself. Nobody seems to like me in this school, but who cares, its fine by me. I've been here since the morning, but all I keep getting were whispers and curious looks being directed at me.

Obviously the students of Forks High were all away when the teachers talked about subtlety. "That's her over there" I heard a hush whisper coming from another table. I bit my sandwich, feeling a little bit self conscious.

This is what you get if your father just happens to be a chief in a small town in the middle of no where. Everybody knows your name, and everybody seems to think that you are their business.

It was odd for me. All my life I've been studying in an all girls school, so I was use to seeing girls. But boys on the other hand…

I took another bite from my salad sandwich and slowly sank down my chair. Did they have to stare like that? I thought to myself. All of the pointed looks that people kept throwing my way was really starting to annoy.

Their probably wondering why I'm not trying to make friends with anyone. It's not my fault I'm an introvert. If you've been caged up in a school filled with girls, then obviously seeing people who mingles with the opposite sex will be quiet odd.

I watched from a far as a blonde cheerleader jumps on her boyfriend and tries to give him a wet kiss on the cheek but fails miserably. The footballer boyfriend just shrugged her off and said something rude to her which caused an uproar in the jocks table, earning him a high five and an angry punch on the shoulder from his girlfriend.

"Tyler! You are such a jerk!" she gave him one last punch and stalked off towards her table where all her friends either looked disgusted, or were giving her sympathetic looks.

See, that's what I don't get. I noticed that the girls in this small town all fell for these der brained jocks. I don't understand how they can just stand there and let their boyfriends treat them like shit in front of everyone.

I'm guessing it's because of the popularity, because let me tell you, Tyler was no looker. He had short cropped hair, and a face that was set on smirking mode all the time. Despite the fact that he had a good body, he had a nasty personality.

I've experienced it first hand this morning. I was walking to English when I felt the hair from behind my neck prickle, and I knew someone was right behind me. I kept walking, but I couldn't help noticing all of the smirks, and all of the laughing faces surrounding me. Then I realized who they were laughing at.

_Me. _

I turned around to find Tyler behind me doing obscene gestures which includes him getting sexual with my back. I just looked down and blushed fiercely. I kept walking to class, pass the people who just doesn't know when to shut up.

Nope, I don't like him at all.

I started to shred my napkin to pieces, trying to ignore everybody when I heard shuffling next to me, then a really pretty girl sat down.

She had black hair that spiked out in different directions. She sat there playing with her mobile phone, not realizing that the table was occupied by a loner. I just stared at her with wide eyes.

Then as if she just figured out my existence she gave me a side ways look, as if assessing me. I blushed furiously. I felt my self go red as a tomato, then she smiled.

"Sorry, hope you don't mind me sitting here" she said in a musical voice.

"Nah.. it's okay" I replied. She kept looking at me with the same mischievous smile, and I kept turning a deep red color.

"Aww you are soo cute! I like you already!" she squealed. I just sort of bowed my head. After all, how do I answer that?

"I'm Alice Cullen, your new aren't you? What's your name?" she said in that same soprano voice. But the thing is, she sounded genuinely excited.

So I blushed even more and tried to look her in the eyes, "I'm Bella Swan" oh boy, awkward much?

Alice just giggled and started talking. She was just so nice, I don't get how anyone can be so nice. Then she started asking me all of these questions about which school I came from, and whether I like Forks or not.

We were in the middle of chatting, and I was starting to warm up to Alice when I heard the cafeteria door opened. My breathe caught. Any minute I could just suffocate because of the sight in front of me.

Without warning, without as much as a thunder from the sky, there he was, like a meteor he crashed right in to my life. As soon as I saw that face, I knew that my life was never going to be the same again.

From where I sat with Alice he was the personification of perfect. His hair shone bronze from the little natural light that was coming out of the cafeteria window was in conflict, as if each and every strands are fighting each other, yet none would lay flat, his lean body held perfectly so he walked with a certain strut, but still looked graceful.

I felt my mouth start to water, so I quickly shut it before I made a complete ass of myself. As a diversion to stop myself from drooling, I busied myself by looking towards the other two guys who came in with them.

One of them was gigantic, with dark brown hair. His muscles showed with every move he took, I looked as he flexed his muscle towards the table of freshmen girls, I swear they looked like they were about to faint from embarrassment. I looked at the other guy, he was pretty tasty too.

He was leaner, but still well muscled, with a mop of blonde hair. The boy looked at the bigger one and just shook his head, as if to say 'what an idiot'.

"Show off" I heard Alice say. She rolled her eyes while I continued to ogle these weirdly beautiful batch of hunks.

Then as if he could sense my gaze, the blonde one turned towards me, giving me a rather blank look. He just stood there looking at me, and I kept looking back, because I couldn't get myself to look away.

The big one noticed that his friend's attention was no longer on him, so he followed his friends gaze then his eyes locked on mine.

_Oh joy…_

I looked down in a way hiding away from their gazes. "Oh shit…Alice.. Is it just me or are they looking at me?" I asked with a bit of panic in my voice. Alice just shrugged and grinned. "I think it's just you being paranoid, relax Bella!" she chuckled.

So I looked up, but then my eyes clashed with bronze haired boy's green ones. I felt like I was drowning, screaming for air. Then I quickly looked down.

I poked Alice on the side. "What?! I just wanted to see your reaction" she giggled.

I tried to hide my bright red face with my hair. I could still feel the heat of their gaze on me.

I think today is officially 'pick on Bella' day.

"Alice? Are they still looking?" I couldn't help my voice from turning high pitched.

"No, no, no they've gone already" she said shrugging. So I lifted my head up, but my eyes clashed with the big guy's gaze.

_Oh crap, _he started laughing. Then I looked at the bronze haired boy's face, I felt my mental string break; there he was looking beautiful looking at me like I'm some sort of a parasite who just crawled in his line of vision. He turned to sit with the rest of the jocks.

_Go figure. _Someone as beautiful as him could probably get away with treating a girl like shit, he was probably a dickhead anyway. _oh what the heck, _He was a drop dead gorgeous dickhead.

I sighed, a little too lost in my own little fantasies that I didn't notice that I actually sighed loudly. Loud enough for Alice to hear.

She turned sharply towards me, then she turned towards where Edward sat with all of his friends. As if understanding dawn on her, she started to shake her head.

"Unbelievable…you too? What is the world coming to?" she shook her head. I blushed but looked her in the eyes and said "Are you blind? I mean he is like a god!" which was pretty much the whole truth.

She just sort of looked at me as if to ask 'are you on crack?' but I ignored her pointed look.

"Sickening, I don't get the deal with all of you girls, I mean why HIM?" she asked disbelievingly. I thought about that for quiet a bit, thinking whether I should tell her the truth or lie. The truth seemed to win.

"Well come on, your saying that because it probably really easy for you. I mean if you wanted someone like Edward you could probably get him just like that!" I said snapping my fingers to make a point.

Alice was looking at me like I was on drugs again.

"what? It's true, I mean have you seen yourself in the mirror lately? Your hot! While you look at me, I'm plain, boring…I look like a librarian for god's sake!" which was totally true. I've never been so conscious of my hair and my pale skin which was far too ordinary. Compared to Alice, she would be Daphne from Scooby Doo, while I'm Velma. The geeky nerd with the glasses.

I sighed for the second time. I looked at Alice's face. It held a really odd look which I wasn't expecting, then she cracked up laughing, causing everybody to look at us, including the jock's table.

"Okay, okay Bella! Firstly, ewww! Never going to happen, secondly, ewwww, so don't even think about it!" by that time Alice already had tears in her eyes.

I frowned at her. She held up her hands as if to surrender. "alright alright, he's a hottie super bomb! Can we please get past that? Eww, because Edward is my brother" she said it so slowly. Then just to patronize me she spelt it one by one. "I get the idea!" I said huffily. But after a while, I started laughing too. "That would be pretty gross" I said between fits of giggles.

"What is?" Alice asked between fits of hysterical laughter.

"You and your brother!" then we both cracked up laughing. Then suddenly we both stopped laughing in unison and looked at each other.

"Ewww!"

After a while, we both came back down from fairy land. "Look Bella, I don't get it because everybody seems to fall in love with him. And to me, he's just this jerk that seems to change girlfriends the same way he changes his under wear. In other words, he's a grade A jerk. I mean don't get me wrong, as a brother he's awesome. He's always there to look after me and stuff, but I don't like the way he treats other girls.

"So my only advice would probably be to stay as far away from him. He eats girls like you for breakfast" she said sounding genuine.

In a way I sort of saw that coming, someone like him can't be any different from all of the other guys.

Anyway, I don't even know why I'm bothering. There's no way he can like somebody like me. I mean, my own parents didn't even want me around, that would explain why they got divorced and shifted me off to a boarding school.

I smiled to myself bitterly…That would be a different story. After all, I did leave behind a pretty angry teen somewhere in the boarding school. I came to Forks with the intention of starting all over again.

"So Bella, what class have you got next?" Alice asked, not noticing the sudden change in me. I snapped back to reality. "umm, theatre I guess" I mumbled. Alice just nodded.

I heard the bell go. I headed straight to my locker, but somebody was leaning on it. He was one of the people sitting on the jocks table. I noticed him before, since he was in my English class.

I stood there for a bit, waiting for him to move. But he was oblivious to my presence. So I coughed really loudly. He jumped slightly, then turned sharply towards me, his blonde hair styled oddly like the bronze haired boy.

He stood there smirking at me. "Ok Einstein, move, your standing right in front of my locker" I drawled lazily.

Usually I was intimidated by jocks, for some reason this guy just didn't impress or scare me.

"Say please!" he said mockingly.

I stared at him through narrowed eyes.

So I started nodding, having a fake smile on my face. "Can you PLEASE get the fuck off my locker?" I said my voice filled with sarcasm.

"Or what? You're going to attack me with your little smurf powers?" he said smirking. Just then my locker neighbor Jessica Stanley came, gave me a fake smile then wrapped her arms around the blonde guy's neck.

"Mikey are you flirting with that thing?" she said pointedly, flipping her hair out of her face.

I swear, people like these two deserve to be in the bottom of the deepest ocean, preferably somewhere where there's a lot of sea monsters.

When he finally got off my locker, I was undoubtedly late for theatre class. I walked through the hall way, still self conscious about all the stares I was getting. I opened the auditorium where we were to have our theatre class every week.

I was late, I hated to be late. I opened the door and was greeted by more curious looks and whispers. I bowed my head and headed straight to Ms. Culling and handed in a form that she needed to sign.

"Welcome to Forks High Miss Swan, please take the empty seat right next to Mr. Cullen" right like I really knew who Mr. Cullen was.

I gave her a blank look. Then she pointed towards the back where the bronze haired boy sat staring at nothing in particular.

_This is going to be a long lesson. _

"Ok class, before we can do anything else, we have to do a couple of exercises to gain each others trusts, so please pair up with whoever your sitting with" Ms. Culling said loudly, her voice echoing through out the auditorium.

Of course I blushed, right next to me was some one who was very much Edward-shaped.

**Day 7**

It has been such a long week. In between trying to get rid of Alice whenever she gets her shopping urges and drag me to Port Angeles, and trying not to look like an idiot in front of her brother. So far I'm not succeeding at all.

During that first day in theatre class I managed to drop him during the trust exercise, and trip over on the random flute lying on the ground.

Note to self: Find the moron who left the stupid flute on the ground and hunt him down.

Not only that, I'm pretty sure that Edward has already got me down as a mute. Which is just brilliant. Accident prone and a retard, what a beautiful trait huh?

But over all, I think this week has been alright, I mean it has been sufficiently awkward for most parts, but I am over everyone staring at me.

My home life wasn't any better. If Charlie wasn't at work, his eyes would be glued to the TV watching sports. I haven't exchanged any words with him what so ever.

This is going to sound weird but I somehow liked it when people kept looking at me. Embarrassing, I know. But I am so sick of being ignored that I just want to be noticed for once.

Anyway, I'm going down to the Cullen's today. Alice wanted me to come over to help her with her homework.

**Day 7 (Later)**

Alice is as good as dead! She told me to come over to help her with her homework, but it was just part of her insane plan to give me an extreme make over. Urgh! I'm too pissed to talk right now.

My hands are seriously shaking. This has got to be the most embarrassing day in the history of my personal little universe!

**Hey guys, hope you like this…I wanted to give this a crack, you know having everyone as human, with normal human emotions lol. This is based on Twilight if you guys haven't noticed, based on Bella's first day and so on!! **


	2. Chapter 2

**He hates me**

**Part 2**

**Day 7 (still)**

I'm finally calmed enough to form a coherent thought in my brain. Okay, perhaps I did overreact a little bit when I came inside her room and she chased me with a hair gold plated straightener on one hand and a sleek hair serum on the other. 

But once again I became the victim of a makeover attack. God knows, I've only been friends with Alice for a couple of days, her upbeat manner kind of tires me out. 

So this is pretty much what happened. I pulled my truck in to the driveway. My breathe still catches whenever I see the Cullen house. 

I've pretty much been over at Alice's house everyday, and each day she always tries to attack me with make-up products and such, so I don't know why today was going to be any different. 

I hopped down my red truck and headed towards the door, hoping to god that Edward doesn't open the door. But in a way I was in conflict with myself. 

I wanted to see Edward. I felt honor with the fact that whenever he's in the same room as me, we are actually sharing breathing space. 

But of course he's always ever so blank with me. To him, I'm just one of his sisters friends. Crushing on someone can be so tiresome, especially when that mentioned someone can't see you as anything else but an acquaintance. 

So I started heading towards the door, I stood there for a couple of seconds before pressing the doorbell. I waited anxiously. 

Then I heard the door creak open. The sight of Edward made me almost lose my mind. He was standing there with nothing but his boxers on. 

My eyes did this thing where they traveled all the way down and stayed rooted on the spot where his 6 pack showed. 

A cool girl would have gone "Hey there hot stuff, I'm here to see your sister, but if you want we can get friendly!" but seeing as I'm not exactly cool. I just stood there, with a little bit of drooling action and just mumbled "Alice…Homework…" Edward just smirked, nodded inside. 

I kind of stumbled inside, not before tripping over the coat stand and toppling everything on it. I hurriedly tried to pick everything up, but then I tripped on one of the coats. 

"I am so sorry!!" I pleaded apologetically. 

"Look, just go to my sisters room, I'll get these" he smiled slightly. I mean it wasn't a smirk, it was more like an amused smile. 

So I ran up the stairs towards Alice's room before I made more of an ass of myself. 

I walked past the gigantic wooden cross on the end of the stair way. I honestly don't know what that was doing there, the Cullen's just didn't seem like the religious type. 

I turned to my left, almost getting lost, accidentally opening Emmet's room where I saw him playing with Rosalie Hale's blonde hair. 

Rosalie's beauty made me feel sick to my stomach. She had the classic ice queen look. Blonde hair and beautiful blue eyes. I could tell that Rosalie doesn't really like me that much. Her glares explains it all. 

Her brother was nicer, he actually smiles at me. I met him on my second day when he said hi to Alice. I couldn't help noticing Alice's face, for some weird reason she was blushing A LOT. 

I finally found Alice's door and opened it. I expected to see all of her school books scattered everywhere, instead I found her holding a hairbrush on one hand and her hair straightener on the other.

I quickly bolted out of the door, sensing disaster as it loomed over me. "Oh no you don't! Come here Bella, don't make me tackle you!" she yelled.

To be honest I wasn't that scared, I mean Alice is miniscule. I was surprised that she was actually fast on her feet, she caught me in no time and dragged me back to her room. "Alice! What the hell! Come on! Quit it!" I started yelling. Then she suddenly stopped.

Alice looked at me with her hazel eyes. I watched as they went round, and turned in to sickly cute puppy dog eyes. "Bella don't you trust me?" she sniffed. Her sad expression was just so heart breaking. 

"Aw come on Alice! That's hardly fair!" I bit back. Then her lips started to quiver, as if she was really going to cry. And of course, stupid me, stupid Bella fell for it. 

"Fine! Do whatever you want!" I scoffed. The the heartbreaking smile was gone and was replaced by her mischievous smile. Now this was the Alice I know and love. What an evil little pixie. 

I scowled at her and headed towards her bathroom and plopped myself down her squishy beautician's chair. I stared suspiciously at the handle of the chair. I could have sworn I saw this chair on the mall for about 300. 

Alice dragged me out of the chair and took me towards the sink where she took my head and ran water through it. I squealed. 

"Relax Bella! It's just water, I'm just washing your hair, so I can apply these serum!" and so she did. Having shampoo worked up in a lather. Once she was done she applied some serum, then blow dried my hair. 

I watched as she went a little crazy with the hair straightened. I had no idea what she was doing, since it didn't seem like she was really straightening it. 

When she was done she started applying all kinds of make up on me. Trying to give me the natural look. I had no idea what she was doing. And to be honest, I was starting to freak out. 

Then all too soon, I heard my stomach grumble, Alice heard it too. So we both decided to go to the kitchen. I had to change my white t-shirt and pants because somehow Alice soaked it by accident. 

I ended up wearing Alice's bunny pajama bottoms with these brown tank top with majestic embroidery around the neckline. I was about to reach for my hoodie but Alice stopped me. 

"Forget it Bella, everybody is probably in their rooms anyways, nobody is going to see you wearing my bunny pajama bottoms" she said. So I shrugged. I left Alice to clean up a bit and headed towards the kitchen. 

I started walking down the hall way, going past various rooms. Then I heard my name. I know, I know, its bad to eavesdrop, but hey I just couldn't resist. 

I leaned in, pressing my ears against the door. I could hear voiced coming from the other side of the door. It sounded a lot like Jasper and Edward too. 

"What is up with that chick who's always hanging around your sister?" came Jasper's curious voice. Then I heard laughing which sounded a lot like Emmet. 

"Ouch! Why did you do that for?" he complained. "So anyway, she's that new girl. She's a klutz, I heard she's also Chief Swan's daughter. I think her name is Becca or something" there was more laughing coming from Emmet, "And I'm pretty sure she's got a gigantic crush on Edward, you can tell, she goes a red as a tomato whenever he's around!" then there was another 'ouch!' and 'ows!'. 

I was about to walk away from embarrassment when I heard Edward say something that would probably stay in my mind for a very long time. 

"She's just some random girl who doesn't even have much going for her, and if she does have a crush on me, then maybe one of you can explain to her that I don't go for weak girls without substance" he said lazily, breaking my already broken heart. 

"Yeah, yeah, substance my ass. I mean come on! You went out with Tanya just because she had big jugs!" Emmet laughed. 

"You have a point there" Jasper joined in. 

I tried to walk away, but everything I just heard pretty much got my head spinning. I tried to go back to Alice's room, but instead I accidentally broke a flower vase. 

"What the!" Edward yanked the door open and looked like he was about to start yelling when he suddenly stopped. 

His beautiful face that was set in a scowl now looked at me with a slightly shocked expression. I just stared at him with a really guilty face. Then Emmet crashed in to Edward and grabbed his shoulder to see what was happening. 

He looked at me with the same expression that Edward had, then he looked at the shattered pieces of glass everywhere. Then he started laughing, he started shaking all over the place, then wiped the tears coming out of his eyes. 

I looked to Edward who was still staring at me with such intensity that I wanted to shrivel up. Oh god, I think he hates me. 

"I am so, so , so sorry! I'll clean it up-" but I was cut off when Alice pranced up to where we all stood. "Oh Bella, I can't even leave you alone without breaking anything! Come here, leave it there, I'm sure the boys will clean it up!" 

"But Alice I-I-" I stuttered. Then I heard Edward speak. "Nah, we'll clean it, you guys go" he said with that same velvet voice. I looked at him apologetically as Alice dragged me down the stairs. But not before I heard Edward say "Do you think she heard what I said?"

Oh oh oh, I just want to blow up right now! That has got to be my worst day ever! After Alice fed me, I just told her Charlie was expecting me home early. Of course that was a lie. Charlie didn't care much these days. 

There's no way I can ever erase the words Edward said to me. Because right at that moment I felt my mental string snap. 

_School is going to suck tomorrow!_


	3. Chapter 3

**disclaimer**: All of the character you recognize in this story are all property of the great Stephanie Meyer

R&R!! Thanks!

_**Avoidance: Get over it!**_

_**Part 3**_

_**Day 8 (In bio)**_

Just because he looks utterly gorgeous doesn't mean I should be drooling over him. After all he made it clear yesterday, and I'm pretty sure he hates me. I need to get over this damn crush, because that exactly what I'm going to get in the end, and a hole in my heart. Not that I'm saying it's still there. Edward did a pretty good job at ripping it open yesterday.

So anyway, it looks like my guess from last night was right; Today was already proving itself to be a rather painful day. It's like, life is having so much fun that despite the fact that I'm already on the ground, he/she just had to send my weakness to make sure I stayed on the ground.

This morning was just as painful. I love my old beaten up truck and all but I should have known that it wouldn't go the distance.

After leaving the Cullen house yesterday, I was in too much of a hurry to drop by in the petrol station to get the tank filled up. I just wanted to roll under my blanket and hopefully disappear in the face of the planet. But you know, not so much. I just slept and tried to think happy thoughts, but ended up with a nightmare.

Then, as if that wasn't bad enough, I got ready for school and left early. Half way there my stupid truck suddenly faltered and stopped right in the middle of the road. I started to panic when I saw a big cloud of smoke coming out of my truck. I quickly hopped down and opened up the bonnet of the car, I looked at the confusing machinery inside.

Oh crap. I was screwed, completely and utterly screwed.

I left the bonnet open, and tried to look up and down the road, it was completely deserted. Not only that I was surrounded by green trees, everywhere.

I started to panic, I climbed on the back my car looking for something, a manual, anything that could help me but I found nothing. I thought about walking to school, but it was too far away. So my next choice was to wait for a car to come and save me.

I sat on the back of the still smoking car. I just sat there and waited. I was starting to get restless. I felt my self starting to get detached from reality. In my head I was having a smart conversation with Edward; in my head he felt something for me.

But then my daydream turned in to a daytime nightmare. I heard Edward's cutting velvet voice as he said those words again. I can't help but feel my mental string getting pulled further and further away.

Why, oh why was this happening to me. I felt that same numb feeling I felt in my heart last night, it was starting to engulf me.

Just then I heard the familiar sound of a car speeding this way. I straightened myself up then jumped down from the back of the truck. But as soon as I saw a silver Volvo pull over, I started walking away towards where I thought the school was.

I recognized the Volvo, I knew who was going to be sitting inside the leather interior before the owner even opened it up, and he was the last person I wanted to see.

Edward winded down his window and gave me a crooked smile. As soon as I saw that smile, I instantly melted, I had to look away. So I started walking.

"Wait! Bella!" he yelled out. I stopped walking and looked back.

"Let me give you a lift, come on, it's only a 10 minute drive!" he added. I just shook my head and tried to give him a smile which looked a lot like a grimace.

"No thanks Edward, I'm fine, I'll just walk, it's really close" trying really hard not to make my voice crack.

"Are you kidding? You won't reach school for at least another 30 minutes, plus it's raining! Come on, I'll give you a lift" he pressed on.

Do I really want to be stuck in a car with Edward? Of course I do, it's just that I can't look at him. I don't have the right to look at him. After all, he was pretty clear yesterday. I'm just some stupid girl with a stupid crush. Never the less I still need to go to school.

So I went with him. He called up for a tow truck to retrieve my truck. Inside the Volvo, everything was quiet at first. But then he suddenly hit the accelerator and was driving like a maniac! I felt my stomach go up my nose. I felt sick.

"Oh my god! Slow down!" I screamed. He just laughed and decreased the speed a bit. A little bit.

"Sorry, I forgot, I'm so use to driving like this" he said, looking at me. I started to panic. I punched his arm and told him to look at the road.

During that drive we came close to hitting a cat and somebody's mail box.

We arrived at the school car park where people were already milling around. He abruptly parked the car right next to Emmet's gigantic truck where Alice was with Jasper.

I stumbled out of the truck, pushing the sickening sensation down the pit of my stomach. I put my head between my legs trying to even out my breathing.

I felt two feet stand right next to mine. "Hey Bella, looks like you just experienced my brother's psychotic driving, are you alright?" she asked enthusiastically. I looked at her in what I hoped to be a rather frustrated look then took her arms and frog marched her towards the building.

"Hey you two, wait up!" then the boys joined us too. I reached my locker and stayed there while everybody else started walking towards their own locker.

Emmet gave me a pat on the head and said; 'Try not to trip Bella' then smiled sweetly. I just frowned towards him and stuck out my tongue. He just laughed his booming laugh and walked off.

What a stupid morning.

I walked in biology to find Edward already there, sitting on the far right side on the back. I usually sat next to him, but today I just couldn't. He looked up when I walked in, so I quickly looked down. I headed towards the other side of the room, and sat my self down next to Angela.

I quiet liked Angela, she was the only one in the whole of Forks High, with the exception of Alice, who truly had dept, and wasn't too shallow. She was shy around me, and I was shy around her, we were a constant shy-fest.

When I sat down she gave me a smile, but didn't ask any questions. Thank god.

So now here I am, writing this in Biology. We are supposed to have private study time since Mr Varner couldn't make it today. Instead I am ranting on and on about a boy who probably would never ever like me back. I am such a poor soul.

I looked towards where Edward sat. I stared as he scratched his head then look out the window.

I sighed, is this day ever going to end?

**Day 8 (sitting on a lone bench at the back of the school)**

He is acting weird.

Why is he acting weird? Edward is being really odd.

After biology he came up to me and started talking. He wanted to walk me to my next class, so of course I agreed.

Why say no when I am completely lacking common sense? We were walking to class when a bunch of his friends saw us coming, including Tyler the jerk. He just smirked at me.

Edward went towards them, completely ignoring me. So I just sort of started walking. I tapped him on the shoulder and told him I'll see him later, but instead of smiling at me, he just gave me this really arrogant look and raised his eyebrows.

So I walked out of there, sharpish! Urgh! I can't believe I fell for it again. What is wrong with me?

I mean, wake up Bella! He said it himself. He doesn't like you. He doesn't!

**Day 10 **

It's been two days since my car broke down, and it's been 2 days since Edward almost walked me to class. I'm doing my best to avoid him. To be honest, I really don't want to see him. Because if I saw him, it'll only remind me of how much I want him, and of how much it sucks that he just doesn't want me back.

For the pass two days I've been avoiding him. This morning after my first class I saw him walking from the opposite direction with Jasper and Emmet. As soon as I saw him, I knew my eyes grew big. I bolted towards the nearest bathroom.

I stayed there until I was sure that he was gone. Then I slowly got out of the bathroom and headed towards my gym class where I gained a bruise on my arm from playing soccer. Don't ask me how I got it.

During lunch time I walked inside the cafeteria to find that it was buzzing with students. Alice called me over, but I stopped abruptly when I saw that Jasper, Emmet, and Edward were there.

I hesitated for a bit, in complete conflict with myself. But then I felt my self being tugged away by small hands. I looked up to discover that Alice was dragging me to their table.

I didn't have enough time to react. So I sat down next to Alice, right across from where Edward sat.

Edward gave me a very dark look, I didn't know what came over me but I glowered at him. His face softened a little bit, but then he looked away. I don't know what was wrong with him! He had no right to give me such looks!

So most of the time I kept to myself. Only speaking when Alice spoke to me.

Then I saw this girl prancing towards us like a demented rag doll. She had blond curly hair, gray eyes which squinted a lot, and this annoyingly high pitched voice. But then I noticed that she was top _heavy. _

"Hey babe" she snaked her arms around his neck from behind and gave him a big slobbery kiss on the cheek. Then came Tyler, Mike, and all of the jock group followed towards our table. The whole time Edward had this indescribable expression on his face as if he's trying to tell me something.

But I couldn't take it anymore. I stood up and growled softly so only Jasper and Alice could hear. "I'd better leave before all of my lunch comes out of my mouth!" I hissed.

Then I heard the girl laugh like a hyena, so I laughed like a hyena. The whole time Alice, Jasper, and Emmet smirked, Edward stared at me looking shocked, while the girl had the decency to look offended. Then I abruptly stopped laughing and gave Edward a dead serious look.

Oops, looks like there's still an angst ridden teen somewhere in me. It's not very guh-making

Then I turned and started heading towards my locker. There I saw Mike Newton, again. Is everyone in this town on drugs or something? Because if that's the case, then I'm getting affected.

"Off my locker Newton" I drawled lazily. Giving him a dirty look. He just looked at me, and instead of sniggering or smirking, he actually moved out of the way.

"Look new girl, we might have gotten off the wrong foot and I'm sorry. I'm Mike Newton. Sorry for being an asshole" he said, and he actually sounded genuine.

His big eyes going round, making him look cute in my eyes, instead of a parasite. So I sighed and forgave him. Maybe there is still hope in this one.

"Okay fine, I'm Isabella Swan, but I prefer to be called Bella. So why the change of heart?" I asked slowly. Looking at him from the side of my eyes.

Mike sighed heavily. "Nothing, just had a very crap day, that's all. I don't really want anyone to be breathing down my neck, so I've decided to just be nice" he said.

Fair enough I guess. So he walked me to theater class where for once I was actually early. I walked inside the auditorium. Nobody was there yet. I stepped inside, but before I could slam the door I heard a soft lullaby fill the air. I gently closed the door, and started walking down the steps towards the big piano where bronze hair bobbed down.

I stared at Edward, feeling my heart on my sleeve. I started walking towards him, the music still in the air. Then he opened his mouth, the most beautiful sound came out of his lips. Those lips I always dreamt about.

_I wish I can be the one_

_Who can save you when your down_

_I wish I can be the one_

_Who can hold you when the world lets you down_

_I know the pain I've caused you_

_But I just want to let you know  
_

_That I would give my everything_

_If only I can hold you in me_

_I will wipe away the pain_

_Though I know I'm the one to blame_

_If only I can have you with me  
_

_I will reach beyond the stars_

_I will give away my soul_

_I will kiss away the pain_

_I will chase away the loneliness_

_Just to let you know…_

The song ended in a crescendo, he looked up and saw me standing there. He was looking at me intently, as if trying to figure out what was in my mind. I felt the electricity in the air, and I started to wonder whether he felt the same way too.

Then we heard the door open, letting in the rest of the theater class. The moment was broken.

Thank god he's not a mind reader. That would just be the topping of such a perfect day!

**Day 12 (Nurse's office)**

Ahhh what a horrible day. I am now lying down in the nurse's office. Biology was just horrible today. For some stupid reason, the stupid teacher thought it would be fun to do blood testing.

I absolutely hate the smell of blood. I hate the rusty smell of it, the horrible smell of a piece of metal that's been left out for too long.

We all got paired up with somebody else. When the teacher was calling out names, I prayed to god that it wasn't Edward, because I could just see the outcome of it.

But of course, god was asleep, or was out on holiday at that moment because he refused to listen to me. So I moved my books towards Edward's table where he was getting all of the equipment.

I tried to shove my hair out of my face. It was getting in my face. Ever since Alice got me a really god hair dryer, I've been using it. What's the point of having it if your not going to use it right?

So instead of it just lying flat, it actually has a little bit of a bounce to it. Well, not as much as Alice's though, which was caused mostly because she bounced around…A LOT.

Edward was looking at me now, so I gave him a small smile, which he returned, I felt my heart do a back flip and a lot of pirouettes.

I really didn't want to do it so I put my hand up and told the teacher that I already knew my blood type, but instead she shouted at me for ruining the fun for everyone.

_OH JESUS. _

At that point Edward was already smirking, a laugh bubbling up in the surface. So I gave him a very dirty look and took the pin out of his hands.

As the needle started getting closer and closer towards my finger, I swear I could hear the phantom of the opera theme song playing in my head. I started to panic and looked towards Edward.

I gave him an even dirtier look as I realized that he was holding up his phone and playing the song just to creep me out.

So I got it over and done with. I pricked myself with the needle, as soon as the first drop of blood oozed out, I started to get very dizzy, the smell over powering me. Then everything went black.

I woke up in the nurse's station, Edward was sitting across from me. He quickly sat up when he realized that I'd awaken.

He gave me a rather concerned look. "Why didn't you tell me you hated the smell of blood?" he asked gingerly. I just grunted and groan at the headache I was feeling.

"You didn't ask me" I answered.

"so what happened?"

"You passed out as soon as you saw your own blood" he said "It was a riot in there!" he said we a slight chuckle. I furrowed my eyebrows together. Then I started laughing at the ridiculousness of the image I was getting.

"So did you have to carry me?" I asked slowly.

He nodded. I blushed.

"I'm sorry!" I croaked. He just shook his head and told me that everything was fine, and that I could go to the gym as soon as I was done.

So this is why I'm still in the nurse's station. Frankly, I didn't really want to go to P.E. I would probably get more injuries.

**Day 12 (Still: At home)**

When I got home Charlie fussed over me. I mean, he actually fussed over me. It turned out the school called him up and told him I passed out. The moment I walked inside he was frantic.

I haven't had Charlie fuss over me in a very long time. And to be honest, it felt good. So I just sort of smiled and gave him a hug.

He gave me a puzzled look. But its been a long time ever since I felt this way. I wanted to jump for joy, because for once I knew that Charlie still cared about me, despite the fact that we don't really talk that much anymore.

I still have a lot of dues to pay. I owe Charlie a lot. I've done so much stuff to him, I've hurt him before. I know I've left a couple of scars in his heart, but I will make sure that they will disappear. I will let him know somehow that I really have changed.

I'm not the same girl from that boarding school anymore.

**(A/N) **Hey guys, this has been updated, it had a lot of errors last time, and i didn't have time to fix it up. So once again, enjoy!


	4. AUTHOR'S NOTE:: MUST READ!

**Hey guys.**

**This isn't the actual update, but please read this. This is important. I know that some of you are confused with what the hell is happening. So I'm going to explain some of the stuff that I know is confusing. **

**Bella's character- I didn't want Bella to be too much like Stephanie Meyer's original character, because that's what everybody else is doing. So I decided to put a bit of my personality in her. Bella use to be a screwed up tween, you will find out in later chapters. She's trying to change, in a way she's sort of back to how she was before her parent's divorce. **

**Bare in mind that this is written in a diary format, so she sort of jumps from time to time. And nobody has asked me this yet, but I thought I might as well put it out there; This is all strictly Bella's thoughts. Your just going to have to wait later on, but at this point I'm pretty sure Edward's actions are pretty clear. **

**I'm trying to have stuff from the first book in it as well (blood testing, bella having 'car troubles' and Edward rescuing her). So basically this is twilight, just all of them are humans. **

**Anyways keep reading and keep reviewing. Reviews make me type faster, me typing faster means UPDATES UPDATES UPDATES **

**X**

**ROSE**


	5. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: **The characters you recognize are owned by Stephanie Meyer!!

**R&R: **Hey guys, I hope this isn't boring or anything, but I felt this had to be brought up. flinch

**Light at the end of the tunnel **

**Part 4**

**Day 14**

Nothing much has happened these past couple of days. I know that I was pretty cryptic last time. My relationship with my mum and dad is not quiet like how it use to be.

We use to laugh a lot, go to vacations a lot, and just be happy with each other. But that was a million years ago. I can't help but feel frustrated. All I want is for everything to be back to how it was before they sent me off to the boarding school.

For a while I thought Charlie and Renee were happy with each other. On the surface they looked so loving, that anybody who happen to see them just wouldn't be able to hide a smile.

But everything changed when I was 12. The fighting and the screaming started, I was frightened of Charlie because I've never seen his angry side before, and mum…How I wish she could smile at me again, but I haven't seen her smile at me for a very long time.

I was so confused of everything that was going on. I had no idea why they were fighting, all I knew was that I wanted them to stop. But I don't know what happened. We came from being a happy family, in to a broken one who didn't seem to know what to do with each other.

Before I knew it they both whisked me off to boarding school. Away from the two of them. I didn't hear anything from them for a while.

Then during winter I got a telegram from my parents telling me that they were divorced. It tore my world in to pieces. A part of me knew that it was because of me.

Maybe I wasn't a good enough daughter, maybe I was too much of an embarrassment. I don't know. All I know was that in a blink of an eye everything I've ever known just sort of disintegrated. I was never the same again.

And lets just say that I got mixed with the wrong people. But that's another story.

**Day 23**

Wow, I've actually been at Forks High for about three weeks now. I know I haven't written anything on this diary, but what the hell, did you miss me?

Okay, I'm a bit of a weirdo, I really shouldn't do that. So everything has been really weird. Alice is still crazy dragging me to the mall whenever she can, and Edward is still…Well, I don't know. That boy is so confusing! The day after the whole 'blood' incident I saw him in the morning.

As usual he still managed to take my breath away. I thought he was going to say hi, but I guessed wrong. He walked right pass me like the cold winter breeze.

He kept doing that for the rest of the day. I mean you know, fine, whatever, he can do whatever the hell he wants, but at least have the decency to greet someone, even if that someone is a complete loser. Look at me, I always say hi to Eric Yorkie, despite the fact that he spits when he talks.

But who cares, I thought to myself. Two can play the same game. So I ignored him too. Whenever I saw him, I just ignored him.

I honestly thought it was going to be easy, but you know, not so much. He does this thing where he dazzles me without even trying. His piercing eyes has such an effect on me that I walked face first straight in to a tree.

But days passed and suddenly everything changed. I was cleaning my locker before lunchtime when I felt the hair behind my neck stand up. I quickly turned and my eyes clashed with Edward's green eyes.

I noticed that he was standing very close, close enough that if I reached out, my fingers would lightly touch his face.

"Still ignoring me Bella?" he said softly, his Velvet voice leaving a hot trail across my face. I felt myself getting red. I know I should have moved, but I felt incapable of speech. His eyes felt like they were piercing my soul.

He inched closer. I took a step back.

I felt the cold surface of my locker behind my back. I was trapped. Edward's face got closer and closer while a thousand thoughts came rushing inside my head. Then his lips grazed my cheek and hovered just above my ears.

"You can't keep this up forever you know" his velvet voice sounded even more sultry.

I felt rooted to the spot, I didn't know what to do, and I certainly had no idea why he was doing this. After all, didn't he say he didn't like me in that way?

Then before Edward could inch closer, a rush of people came out of the classroom for lunchtime. Edward quickly created space between us and went off as his friends came along.

I got a feeling that Edward was suffering from a mild case of boy disease.

Hold on, I just received an email.

**Day 23 (still)**

Oh god, I can't breathe.

**From:****  
**

**To:**

**Subject:** Home again

Hey Bells,

Yes, I know I haven't contacted you for quiet a while now. I'm just leaving you a message to let you know that I will be in Forks tomorrow. Tell your father I'll be there.

Be good to him.

Love,

Mum

0000000000000000000000000000000

I seriously don't know what to make of it. I haven't seen mum in a very long time. I miss her so much, I don't know why she's coming here. The last time I saw her she looked embarrassed to be my mother.

To be honest, I'm not sure if I'm ready for her just yet. I was just starting to get used to Charlie again.

What do I do?

**Day 21**

Today just went by in a blur. I was so engulfed with my own thoughts that I'm sure I've done a good job of cocooning my self. I walked around with a blank expression on my face while Alice chatted away about her shopping trip with Rosalie.

It took her ages to realize that I didn't have her attention, but when she did, her pretty face looked concerned.

"Bella are you alright? Is it about Edward?" she asked softly. I hastily looked around to see if anybody heard me and turned to her. "Shh! No it's not about him! The world doesn't revolve around him you know" I said matter-of-factly, though I probably should question my own personal little universe.

We were walking around the closest park so I nodded towards a bench. We both sat down and Alice sat there in silence. I just sort of sat there staring at the ducks, then I suddenly blurted 'Mum is coming home!' then looked at Alice's confused expression.

"That's great Bella!" then she trailed off, "That's a good thing right?" she asked uncertainly. I went quiet for a while and sighed. I needed to talk to someone anyway, it might as well be her.

"Mum and I don't get along, I'm pretty sure she hates me actually," I started, "But you know, it's not like I can do anything about that. It was all my fault anyways" I know my voice sounded sad. I started to quiver. I knew that any minute now I would be in tears.

"Bella, what are you talking about? I'm sure you're exaggerating, how can anyone hate you? You're the sweetest person I know" Alice said gently.

"I wasn't always like this. Alice you have no idea how screwed up I was back then…" I started, " When I found out that my parents got divorced I started to rebel against them. Doing stupid things just for the sake of pissing them off. Then I would tell them really hurtful stuff which I would regret later." I know that Alice could hear the pain in my voice.

"Renee pretty much gave up on me. Their visits started to get fewer and fewer over the years until they stopped visiting me at all" I felt myself starting to lose my strength. " I didn't want to go home, because I know that they both resented me. You have no idea how alone I felt. Everybody in my old school hated me!" I finally cried in agony.

I felt my heart starting to freeze over as that same familiar feeling started to take me over.

"I didn't know what to do Alice! So I decided to leave. When I showed up at Renee's doorstep the look of hatred was so clear on her face" I sobbed, my face on my hands.

"I wanted to wipe that expression away from both mum and dad's face, I wanted them to love me again! I wanted to wake up and know that I at least still have my parents love"

In a way, I'm still working on it. But it seems that the wrongs that I've done just wont right itself.

For the rest of the time I just cried and cried. Letting the pain ooze out of me. Alice kept rocking me back and forth holding me in her arms. Whispering soothing words and telling me that everything was going to be alright.

God how I wanted to believe her. But I just know tonight is going to be a disaster. I can feel it. But I can't keep thinking this way. After all, I have changed. I'm not the same girl as I was back in the boarding school.

I would never let my self go like that ever again. There is no way in hell.

And I will prove it to both my parents.

**Day 22**

Wow. All I can say is wow. Dinner was very interesting. Mum came at around 6 pm.

I heard a knock on the door so I quickly opened it to find mum surrounded by bags. She smiled at me, I couldn't help but notice that her smile didn't meet her eyes.

She reached for me and gave me a quick kiss. But instead of letting her get away, I hugged her tightly which surprised her greatly.

I know I shouldn't have done it, but I couldn't help it, I haven't seen her in a long time. I started sobbing and wailing. "I miss you so much mum! Why didn't you call sooner?" I said, my voice sounding squeaky.

Mum just hugged me back, and we stayed like that for quiet sometime until Charlie told us to sit down, we were blocking the door way.

While Charlie got all of Renee's bags upstairs Renee and I caught up with each other, talking like we've never talked before. The whole time I stared at her, I didn't realize until I saw her just how much I missed her.

Renee stared back at me. "What? What's wrong? Do I have something on my face?" she asked, sounding paranoid. Looks like she was back to her old self too. I'm guessing Phil was treating her right.

After her divorce with Charlie, Renee was alone for quiet sometime until she met Phil. I can tell that she was clearly happy. Phil was a good guy. They were both living in Jacksonville now.

I just smiled at mum and shook my head. Mum gently stroked my face and smiled gently. I felt tears starting to bubble up to the surface, but I suppressed it.

"I'm so sorry for everything mum. For everything I've put you through, I'm so sorry. You must hate me huh?" my small voice threatened to crack and I quickly looked down, refusing to let her see that I was feeling just a little fragile.

"Oh sweet heart…come here" so I moved towards her, Mum held me in her arms and kissed my forehead. "I could never ever hate you, so don't ever think that again! No matter how stubborn you are, you will always be my daughter. Sure you've put me through a lot, but that's just part of growing up, I always knew that you would grow out of it. If anybody had to say sorry, it should be me" I felt her shaking, then she continued, "I let you down so badly, I gave up on you. And now I know I shouldn't have. I stopped visiting you, and just completely left you, you have no idea how hard that was for me!" then the tears that were threatening to come out finally came. We both sat down and just cried.

Charlie finally came down and we all ate in peace. We haven't had a dinner like this is a long while.

Renee later told me that she just came here to check on me and to see if I was fine. She was only going to be staying for about 5 days.

I know that everything is not exactly fine just yet. But everything was improving. I can feel it, everything was changing, I was changing. But for once, it was for the better.

I guess now all I've got left is to figure Edward out. Because of all the hype that's happened this week I completely forgot that I had another problem. I know I didn't mention it before, but now it just suddenly popped inside my mind.

The main project for theater class this year is Romeo and Juliet. Guess who just got the lead roles?

Yep, triple merde, Edward and I got the lead role. Excuse me while I go and have a mild heart attack!


	6. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: **I do not own any of these character. Stephanie Meyer does!!

**The last thing I need**

**Part 5**

**Day 23 (School library with Alice)**

I was looking over my lines for the play Romeo and Juliet.

Who in their right mind would actually want to put me in a play when they know that I'm a complete klutz? I got zero coordination, and I can't act to save my life. Hell, I can't even tell a single lie.

This is exactly what I was thinking when I was waiting outside Ms. Culling's office. I sat down on one of the couches going over what to say and how to weasel my way out of playing Juliet.

It was exactly what I didn't need. I had enough to deal with, what with Edward being weird, Alice trying to ambush me every now and then so she could drag me to the mall, and spending time with mum making up for all the losses. Portraying a weepy hormonal teen was the last thing I needed.

I waited patiently for the scarf clad figure of Ms. Culling to step out of her office. I was staring intently at ceiling like it was the best thing in the world. The other teachers inside the staff room kept staring at me from the corner of their eyes.

I looked down and tried to appear discreet. I heard the door open and there stood Ms. Culling with her short bobbed read hair, thick bug eyed glasses, and her colorful bangles. She stood between the door frames staring at me with one raised eyebrows.

"Yes…how may I help you Miss Swan?" she drawled her dramatic bass voice. I sighed and got up and mumbled something even I couldn't comprehend.

She grunted and gave me a calculating look. "Your going to have to speak louder than that Miss Swan, I'm afraid I don't speak mouse language!" she chuckled.

Despite the fact that Ms. Culling sounded a bit mad, she was a real individual, and she was always kind towards me, despite the fact that I'm probably not her best student.

I looked at her and turned a deep crimson. "It-it's just that I don't really want to play Juliet anymore, I would make a very bad Juliet!" I stuttered, my voice catching a little bit, edging towards hysteria.

Ms Culling just smiled kindly and gave me a look of wisdom. "Bah, you're afraid, yes? No need to worry Miss Swan1 I happen to know someone who has great faith in you, in fact, he was the one who recommended you to me!" she ended in a grand note.

I felt mystified. The whole time she was saying this I felt my blood rush into my brain and I couldn't think straight. Who the hell was stupid enough to recommend me?

"But Miss Culling, who would recommended me?!" I know I was starting to sound bewildered, so I tried to keep my temper in control.

"Why, Mr. Cullen of course!"

I stood there at a loss for words. I didn't bother saying anything else. I stamped my way out of the staff office and thundered my way towards the cafeteria where I know Edward would be sitting with his lump headed friends.

I looked towards the table where the jocks sat, surprisingly enough he wasn't there. I looked around the cafeteria. Alice stood up and started waving madly at me. I ignored Alice and kept looking around.

I looked impatiently towards the cafeteria line where some students waited to be serve where I found him and to my disgust he was flirting disgracefully with Lauren and Jessica.

I took a step back and just stared at him through narrowed eyes. There was a big part of me that wanted to throttle him for recommending me, but an even bigger part of me wanted to inflict physical pain because of what I was saying. It looked like he was telling them some outrageous story, and the both of them were laughing like hyenas.

And you know what? I'm pretty sure I threw up in my mouth.

I marched towards Edward seething, when I reached him both Lauren and Jessica were looking at me like I was an earth worm that just crawled out of their sandwich.

I ignored them and turned on him. "Can I please talk to you?" I hissed. Lauren and Jessica looked at each other and inched even closer towards Edward, if that was even possible seeing as they were practically all over him just seconds ago.

I gave them a look which I hope to god scared them and said "In _private?_" I emphasized the last word. Hoping to god that they wouldn't make it complicated for me.

Edward sighed and nodded towards the door. He turned to go and I followed sullenly. He led me through the double doors and out in to the school yard. I looked around and saw that there were only a few people out and about. He took me towards the school steps and sat down at the bottom. He pointed towards the space right next to him which I ignored and instead stood in front of him with my hands on my hips.

"I'm guessing your intoned enough to realize that you actually got the lead role huh?" he assumed. I gave him an irritated look then glared at the leaves of a nearby birch tree which reminded me so much of his eyes.

"Aw come one Bella. Don't be mad. You were ignoring me, and to be honest I didn't want you to ignore me anymore so I kind of recommended you to Ms. Culling to get a reaction out of you" he said delicately. The expression on his face was just too much. He looked so guilty and his eyes just sort of contorted in to these big puppy eyes, which didn't really help me, since I wanted to stay mad at him.

"You know what? I don't get you at all," I started, his eyes held my gaze, which I took as encouragement to keep going. "All week last week you just ignored me, you can't even look me in the eye, and whenever those jocks are around, you always treat me like shit, now you're doing this? Isn't this reaction enough?" my voice almost cracked.

He was driving me crazy, I had no idea what he was trying to do, but I was definitely about to lose the plot.

"Well, I 'got to admit, I was disappointed at first, but your stamping just now was pretty cute…" he trailed off; I could hear a bit of laughter in his voice. I felt my blood rush to my face, and I knew that I was blushing.

"So what now, you want to be friends?" I said through low voice. I stared at him intently. He shrugged, "I guess so, I'm just tired of ignoring you, and you doing vice versa, besides, I don't want things to be awkward between us, seeing as you practically live at my house" he laughed softly.

"By the way, you look very pretty today, that color suits you" he smiled vaguely. I blushed a little bit, pulling the hem of my blue shirt. I sat down reluctantly next to him, and we both sat like that in silence until the bell ring.

Edward got up and offered his hand. I took it and felt the electricity go up and down my arm. I shivered slightly. "So…You're Juliet huh?" he asked, his lips twisting in to a crooked smile that I loved so much.

"I'm going to weasel my way out of it actually, I-I can't do it!" I stuttered the last part. Edward turned towards me and got closer, lowering his face towards me. I started to hear buzzing in my ears, and my heart started beating erratically.

"No, I think you're perfect as Juliet" his breathe left a burning trail across my face. He got even closer, his face only inches away from mine. I tried to look anywhere but his eyes, "Unless of course…You're scared…" he said in a low voice.

"No. I'm not scared of anything…" Then he straightened up and ruffled my hair, he actually ruffled my hair! "That's more like it!" he said enthusiastically and walked back inside the school.

I was left there staring at his retreating back. I waited for my heart beat to ease down.

So now I'm at the library with Alice looking over my lines. She just looked over trying to take a peek at my diary. I just scowled at her.

Alice was no doubt my best friend in Forks, but sometimes I just want to keep things to my self. There had been times where she just didn't get why Edward had such an effect on me. Well duh! Their siblings, she wouldn't understand.

Besides, I think she's been a bit preoccupied these days. She hasn't officially said anything to me, but I'm pretty sure that she has a major crush on Jasper Hale, one of Edward's best friends.

Well I better stop writing, the bell just went releasing us from our private study class, I'm going out tonight with Renee and Charlie for dinner, were going to Port Angeles. I'm trying to spend as much time with her as possible, seeing as she will be leaving in about 3 days.

(A/N) Thanks for reading!! Please leave a review! :0) The next chapter will be about Port Angeles! Expect more Edward moments J

REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!!


	7. Chapter 6

_**Disclaimer: **__I do not own any of these twilight characters. Thank god for Stephanie Meyer!_

_Please read my little note in the end :0)_

**000000000000000000**

_**Port Angeles**_

_**Part 6**_

_**Day 25**_

Last night had to be the worst night of my life, and it was partly my fault!

Charlie, Renee, and I all went to Port Angeles yesterday for dinner. For once I felt happy and light just casually walking the sidewalks with mum and dad. People who walked pass us couldn't help but smile.

I mean, I don't blame them at all, we looked like one big happy family. You know, the type you see on cereal boxes. For once I liked the feeling of pretending_. It were pretence sir! _As Mary Warren from 'The crucible" would say.

It's sad, but true. But I enjoyed pretending. I was enjoying it so much that I was walking around with half a mind, not really watching where I was going.

Somewhere between the pretending and walking around brainlessly…well… I got lost.

No. I'm serious. I got lost. One minute Charlie and Renee was right in front of me, the next minute they were gone, kapish!

I somehow walked in to some random street where I saw a group of people, thinking they were all heading towards the same restaurant we were all going to. Of course I was wrong. They went inside some random pub which I never knew existed and I was left staring around me. I noticed for the first time that Mum and Dad were bloody gone!

I think I must have started hyperventilating. I looked around, up and down the street. It was empty. I know, I know, the smart thing to do would have been to actually go inside the pub and ask where the hell I was.

But I took one look at the pub and did a runner. It looked dark and very old. The type that that you would expect to see a cult inside drinking their drinks, getting wasted.

I tried to walk back to where I came from. I walked slowly trying to think which way I came from. I looked around and saw that there were three streets, and all of them bloody pointed a different direction.

Then came my other stupid mistake.

I closed my eyes and did that thing you do when you can't make up your mind. 'Ini- Mini- Myni- Mo!' My fingers pointed towards the far right, so I started walking that way. I looked around nervously for any sign that could possibly point me back to the busy town. But all I could see within meters were blocks of gray buildings.

I continued walking down the road, looking around every now and then, hoping there would be someone I could ask. But horror dawned with every step that I took.

Horrible images started to fill my head. Thoughts of murder, and thoughts about how Charlie and Renee would be very worried right now.

The street was completely isolated now. I looked around and noticed that the grey buildings were stretching out in to the distant, finally realizing that I did take the wrong route.

I quickly turned around, with the intention of re-tracing my steps, but I froze. I heard voices behind me, and no, it's not just my imagination. I _did _hear people directly behind me.

I slowly turned around, nervously keeping to my self. There were three of them. They weren't that big. One of them had sandy brown hair that went up to his shoulder, his shirt a little too big for him, the shorter one was much more built and stocky, and he was looking at me with a leer. But I gulped when I looked at the last guy. He was massive!

Perhaps not as big as Emmet, but he could easily be a wrestler.

They were all looking at me with a smirk while I stood there frozen. I sharply turned around and started walking fast. My instinct told me to run, run away from them. But for some reason I couldn't. In a way I knew that they were going to catch me anyway knowing my luck in the speed department.

I walked hoping to god that they weren't following me, but I could hear foot steps catching up to me. I turned to look and sure enough there they were. Looking at each other as though their birthdays all came a little bit early.

My erratic heart hammered on. I looked at them hysterically, trying to shut my loud heart out so they wouldn't hear just how vulnerable they were making me feel.

I kept on walking, I clasped my mouth when I saw that the sandy blond guy had moved even closer.

"Aw come on darling, give us some will ya!" The biggest one said in a nasal sounding voice. I just shook my head and tried to run. But my foot caught on the cracked pavement, throwing me off balance.

I threw out my arms to break my fall. I felt the pavement graze my arm. I smelt that same rusty smell, and held my breathe, trying to push the horrible sensation of vomiting down. I heard their foot steps stop just in front of me. They had me surrounded.

I tried my hardest to get up. They all had this sickening smile on their faces, and these looks that told me they were about to have _me _for dinner.

_Scream!_ I told my self, but no sound would come out. I was back on my feet, but I was rooted on the spot. They were all laughing now. The short stocky one tried to grab my butt, but I quickly jumped out of the way.

I looked around, and saw a flash of bronze hair getting out of someone's house. Then like a light switch, instinct took over and I tried running again. This time I jumped over the crack on the pavement, trying to pick up speed.

I kept my eyes on the bronze hair, but I could hear the other three too, they were running after me. I could hear their laughter. It was like a game to them, they were having fun. Having fun with watching me suffer.

The owner of the bronze hair turned when he heard my footsteps.

Of course it was Edward. I would recognize him anywhere I went. Edward looked at me in confusion, watching the play of emotions running across my face. When I reached him, I grabbed his shirt and hid behind him, pressing my face against his back. I was terrified.

Edward pulled me off him and grabbed my cheeks. "What's wrong Bella?" he asked, genuinely concerned. I gulped, and tried to speak, but I couldn't. So I turned my head towards the three figures standing only meters away from us. Edward followed my gaze and he froze. His green eyes suddenly became wary and cold. He took a hold of me and pushed me behind him.

I heard the door from the house Edward just walked out of opened, and I saw Emmet and Jasper step out. Jasper headed our way while Emmet stood slightly a part from us. I looked at Emmet, _was he always that big? _I found myself thinking. I gripped the back of Edward's shirt much tighter. _Oh god, oh god, don't turn in to a full blown fight! _I thought to myself.

I looked towards Emmet as he towered over the biggest of the three. Emmet was at least bigger than him, and the look he had on scared even me! He was walking towards them menacingly, cracking his knuckles. I looked on as the Emmet barked out something uncomprehending. I watched as the blonde one jumped about 5 centimeters up in the air and run towards the opposite way.

The biggest one gave me scowl and ran off after the other two. I shivered slightly, still holding on to Edward shirt.

Edward let go of me and headed towards Emmet. I was standing with Jasper for a while, not talking. The ordeal had left me so shaken that I completely forgot about my bleeding arm. I looked down as I felt it drip.

The pain took moments to register. Then I felt the stabbing pain. I flinched as I looked at the graze, it was more than a scratch, I noticed. The cut went a little bit deeper, while blood started gushing out.

"Oh my god, I think I'm gunna be sick." I said blankly. Both Emmet and Edward looked at me, then at my wound, finally noticing it. Edward rushed towards me and took hold of my right arm. Emmet came and muttered 'shit!' under his breath, while Jasper moved away from me. He was looking at my wound with a sick look on his face, I saw him start to turn green. "I hate blood…" he whispered in a small voice.

I stared at him, then at Emmet who couldn't suppress his laughter. His booming laugh filled the air, while I gave Edward an incredulous look.

"You just can't keep away from trouble can you?" He chuckled softly. I turned red instantly and looked down at my feet shyly. Emmet was still laughing, while Jasper shot him a dirty look, still keeping his distance from my bloody arm. (Note to self: Tell Alice when I see her tomorrow about this, I'm sure she'll find this very interesting)

Edward dragged me inside the house, which I noticed was made out of red bricks, two storey. Who ever lived there must be very rich. Of course it's nothing compared to the Cullen house, but it was still fairly big.

I walked inside, walking past lounge room and straight in to the kitchen where Rosalie sat. Wait, _Rosalie? _I had no idea what she was doing there, but she took one look at my arm and jumped down from her stool and walked out of the kitchen. Ahhh, she's ever so charming. I thought sarcastically.

I looked around and noticed family photos on top of the fridge. Baby photos of two babies in their diapers. I kept looking and found another one. It was of Jasper and Rosalie in their formal clothing. Rosalie looked flawless as usual, her blond curls flowing softly around her beautiful face, while Jasper stood looking embarrassed. I could just guess who took the photo.

Parents. It's like a right of passage or something. Every parents has to have photos of you when your diaper clad or naked, blah blah blah.

So anyway, I was inside the Hale residence. I should have known. But instead of taking it in, I was suffering just a little too much. The pain in my arms still didn't ease. Edward was trying to do everything he could to stop the bleeding, and to be honest, I was starting to feel light headed.

Edward looked me in the eyes and frowned. "Don't you dare faint on me Bella" he said gently. He was looking at me very intensely that I was starting to feel very intoxicated. I looked away before I pursued my urge to meet his lips with mine.

He was being really cute, worrying about me and all that I started thinking that perhaps he had a little thing for me. But when I asked him why he was fussing so much, he just gave me a blank look then smiled. "Because you're my friend, now stop asking questions!" Friend huh? Bah! Who was I kidding. Edward is Edward, wanted by many, meaning he could get who ever he wanted. So I just brushed it off. But I was beginning to think that perhaps being friends with him would be complicated.

His Edward**ism** absolutely drives me mad. (Edwardism is just Edward's weirdness, the way he strings me along like a yo-yo) The more I talk to him, the more I fall for him. What hurts the most is probably knowing he could never ever reciprocate the feeling.

I sighed and let him fix my arm. Surprisingly enough, he was rather good at first aid. He cleansed the wound, while Emmet called up Charlie and Renee. Laughing while telling them the same story I told everyone else, my stupidity.

Charlie and Renee were both very worried when they arrived. Renee took one look at my arm and ran up to me like a child and gave me a hug. I grinned goofily. "I'm sorry guys, I swear I'll be careful next time" I said guiltily.

I hated worrying them like this. So I hugged Renee back and was a good little girl and said goodbye and thanked to the kind boys who helped me. "Thank you so much you guys, if I didn't see you, you'd probably see me in the six o'clock news, dismembered." I said solemnly.

Charlie made a grunting noise from behind me. "Just kidding dad!" I piped up. I turned towards Emmet, "Gosh, I hope you never get smaller, I'll have you on speed dial if I ever want to start something with someone at school" I said in a loud aside.

I heard Charlie choke, and chuckled at Emmet. "Got him again, didn't I?" I said in a low voice. We both started laughing, while Renee and Edward shook their heads.

"Bella, honestly, go on, get out of here! Don't do anything stupid" he started, pushing me gently towards the door, he gave me a hug then pushed me through the door. That hug left me feeling high, Tingles went up and down the part of my skin which his arms touched.

Charlie and Renee both followed. Charlie shook Edward's hands, thanking him for saving my life.

As I walked towards the car, I couldn't help but think that what happened only hours ago felt like a lifetime ago. I'll be going back to school, diving in the part of Juliet, I mean it looks like life really wants to hand me lemons. I mean, as if my life wasn't sour enough already.

So anyway, it has definitely been a very long day, what with Renee being back, me nearly being raped, but all in all, I think it's been great, minus the icky stuff. Look at it this way, Edward talks to me now, my relationship with mum and dad has definitely gone back to normal , and I have a whacked out best friend.

**Day 28**

Mum's gone now. She gone back to Jacksonville to live with Phil. I'm going to miss her so much. She promised to keep in touch, thank god.

Before she left we had a little one on one. She made me promise to be good, and to keep up the good work. Then she said something I haven't heard from her in a while, which still brings a tear or two. "I'm so proud of you Bells, you have no idea!" then she hugged me tightly.

I can't say that everything is back to how it was before I got shifted off to school, but they were definitely better. Charlie spoke to me now too. I mean, we actually talk. He is more at ease too, which I've noticed.

So now my family life is back in order, I have to bring my high school dilemma in control. Everything is driving me crazy.

The rehearsal for Romeo and Juliet has started up and so has the tension. Did I mention that Mike Newton the nitwit is in my Theater class. Yup, he is. He is driving me insane. I don't know if I said something to him back when he apologized to me that might have given him hints that I like him or something, but now I can't seem to get rid of him.

He's shown interests towards me. He follows me around like a lost puppy. And if I asked him to do something for me, he would only be too happy to oblige. I've pretty much got him wrapped around my little fingers, and I don't even know why.

But it seems the tension in theatre class was starting to heat up. Edward started acting up again. But not towards me; Towards Mike Newton. I noticed that whenever Mike came up to me, Edward would always just stand in a corner glare at Mike's neck.

In theatre class today he was joking around with me when he suddenly froze and was looking at someone behind me. I spun around and saw Mike glaring back at Edward. Suddenly I felt like I was being sandwiched between two testosterone filled male, that I had to walk away.

Honestly, what is the deal? Edward is being really cryptic and rude as well. After Mike spoke to me after class, Edward sneaked up behind me and whispered softly in my ears "I bet he's got a bulge down his pants!" he hissed. I felt chills run up and down my spine.

I gave him a dirty look and walked away. He can be such a pig sometimes.

I confronted Alice about this during lunchtime, and surprisingly Alice just laughed. "Don't worry about him, he was so use to having you stare at him with puppy dog eyes that I guess Mike's attention towards you was a bit of a blow to his ego" she said knowingly, wearing that same cheeky smile I loved so much.

But I looked at her incredulously. "That doesn't make sense, I mean he doesn't even like me that way!" I said, my face the color of a ripe tomato.

Alice cocked one eyebrow and said "Oh, you're a mind reader now then?" with a hint of sarcasm. I paused for a bit. Staring out at the jocks table where Edward was laughing at something Emmet was saying.

I tried to push down the sorrow I felt whenever I thought about that hideous day outside of Edward's room.

I shrugged, "No, I didn't have to read his mind, he pretty much declared it to Emmet and Jasper" I tried to sound like I didn't care, but my voice cracked a little, and Alice noticed.

She looked at me with a guilty expression. She was about to say something, but the words died in her lips, and she turned red. I turned to see what's got Alice's attention.

Jasper. All in his blond glory, smiling at Alice. I turned to look back at Alice. "So…You like Jasper huh?" I said nonchalantly, playing with my food, a smile forming in my lips.

Alice turned red. "What?! No way! Are you crazy?!" she exclaimed. I just laughed heartily. Alice grabbed a piece of her hair and started twirling it around her fingers. "Is it really that obvious?" she said in a tiny voice.

I nodded, she leaned closer and put her hands on her mouth, trying to keep a small smile from forming in her lips. "I've had a crush on him for a while now. But you know, I'm just Edward's dumb little sister, plus I guess it would be pretty weird if I started dating my brother's best friend" she shrugged. I looked at her and chuckled.

"Yeah well, that didn't seem to stop Rosalie huh? Her and Emmet are a constant love-fest, it's sickening!" I said seriously. Alice started giggling.

"Urgh whatever, we don't need them!" she added, but I didn't miss the longing look she gave Jasper. "You know what we need? A girls night, just you and me, what do you say? It will totally be zilch of the male species!" she clapped her hands together enthusiastically.

Of course I agreed. How could I refuse Alice of anything?

**0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000**

**(a/n) **Thanks for the people who constantly comments my stories, it always makes me happy!! Um So a pretty little bird pointed out something to me. I got over 1000 hits, more than 40 people alerted this story and added it to their favorites, yet I only got 30, come on that's hardly fair. So I'm going to be such a tight ass for the next chapter. I wanna get sooo muuuuuchhhhhhh reviews for this chapter, and if I feel I didn't get enough feedback, I'm gunna go on strike and delay the update!! LOL I AM SO EVIL! MUHAHAHA

So take care guys!! REVIEW!! PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Xo

Rose!


	8. Chapter 7

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OMG you guys rock! Thank you so much for all the reviews! I'm sorry, I'm not sure what you guys consider as a late update, BUT i'VE BEEN very busy, i only have 2 weeks to my theatre studies performance with the real **Ms. Culling**, and I've been sick as well. So anyway, here goes. I'm sorry about the dates, it gets a bit confusing. But like I said before, diary entries don't always go straight, so I often jump the dates. And keep up the reviews guys! I won't go on strike if you guys keep it up! :) Special thanks for those people who reviewed it last time: **xXLadyMaiaXx, isabellsah cullen, KatieLover77, MidnightWritter, blazingstar1994, EdwardsMyHero, TaylorAlexandra, idotroad, Sellesta, poisoned blood, musicismylife17, Foolish Angel in Darkness, alxriderfan15, acesnei9hts, Luvntwilight, FlyingSparrow711**

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**DISCLAIMER:** ALL OF THE CHARACTERS ARE OWNED BY STEPHANIE MEYER!

**MALE-FREE SLUMBER PARTY**

**PART 7**

**Day 29**

I got ready for my sleep over at the Cullen's house. I know, we wanted to have a 'male' free day, but it turned out we were going to end up going to Alice's house anyways. I tried to argue with Alice, saying that seeing Edward would be the last thing I needed, instead she just shrugged.

"Bella, lighten up! Emmet, Jasper and Edward are all going out to play baseball, so we pretty much have the house to ourselves. Mum and Dad are out for a romantic dinner anyway, so we can create as much havoc as possible!" she grinned at me.

Knowing Edward wouldn't be there gave me relief, and in some ways disappointed me. He might drive me crazy, but I still have a weird obsession with him (Not that I'll ever tell a soul).

So I decided to take a shower before driving up to the Cullen's house. I decided to just carry pajamas with me. I had spare clothes in Alice's room, I always slept over there, especially during days when Charlie is working late night shifts.

Once I was done, I rushed down the stairs, tripping over the last step, colliding against the coat stand. The coat stand fell on the floor, luckily the wall saved my fall. I stood there for a minute clutching my chest. Waiting for my heart beat to become regular again. I heard Charlie get up from the couch, "Bells? Are you alright?" He asked, concerned.

I looked up and gave Charlie a shaky smile. "Yeah I'm fine, you know me, I've got two left feet" I said nervously. Charlie just shook his head and bent down to take the coat stand.

"So where are you off to?" He asked, sounding like the typical concerned parent. I shrugged, and gave him a wicked smile, "I'm going over to the Cullen's house, and have my wicked way with Edward" I started laughing at my own joke but suddenly stopped when I saw the look on Charlie's face.

He looked like somebody just stuck a five foot pole up his ass. I ran up to him and gave him a hug. "Dad! I'm only teasing, as if I'd do that!" I giggled some more. "Besides, Edward doesn't like me that way" I said in a tiny voice. I looked down, hiding away the pain I felt.

I looked up and gave Charlie a brave smile, "Anyways, wish me good luck with my sleepover with Alice, love you dad!" I said cheerfully, giving him a quick kiss on the cheek.

As I stepped out of the house I heard a car pull over. I looked at the black car, but couldn't see the people inside, so I was guessing they were Charlie's guest. I shrugged and headed towards my red truck.

I jumped in, honked once for Charlie and took off towards the Cullen's gigantic house (or should I say mansion?). I felt very nervous somehow. I was in between. Part of me wished Edward was there, part of me wished he was far away in a different land.

In the end, the latter won the argument. I pulled myself from my inner conflict and concentrated on my driving. I looked around, it was already dark outside, and the moon was already high up.

It was a clear night, no sign that it might rain. Thank god, it's been raining for the last few days. I don't like rain that much, it's just so…wet. Yeah, I know, way to go and state the obvious huh?

I pulled in to the Cullen's drive way, turned off the ignition and sat there for a while. I just sat there holding the steering wheel. After a while, I hopped off and headed towards the front door. I rang the door bell, waiting for somebody to open the door.

I heard bouncing from the other side and smiled, it just had to be Alice. Alice yanked the door open and gave me a hug. I smiled down at her and let her drag me up the stairs. I looked nervously around and Alice noticed.

"Don't worry, their not here, baseball remember?" she reminded me. I nodded, but none the less, I still swept the room with my eyes.

We kept walking up the stairs, I looked towards Edward's room. The last time I stood in front of that door, I made the mistake of eavesdropping.

I shook my head slightly, the ridiculous mistake people make in the past, I thought to myself. I went straight to Alice's room. She had movies laid out on the bed, and a lot of food on her side table.

Alice went inside her walk in wardrobe as I looked through her collection of DVD's. they were mostly chick flicks, I picked up the copy of Charlie's Angels. Alice was rummaging through her closet flicking through her wardrobe for no reason at all.

I looked up and gave her a curious look. "Alice, what the hell are you doing?"

Alice walked out of the closet looking a little bit disheveled. "Oh nothing, just looking for outfits I could have you wear!" she smiled broadly.

I gave her a frown, starting to think that maybe this was another ambush. Alice gave me an innocent look. "Look, a sleep over is not complete without a make over, I'll even do it, if it makes you feel comfortable!" she said, clapping her hands together enthusiastically.

To be honest, I didn't feel like arguing for once, so I just let her do whatever she wanted. I looked through all of her cosmetic collection. I don't get why someone so naturally pretty would need so much make-up. I looked at Alice now, she really was pretty.

She had the same pale skin as Edward and Emmet, however her eyes was different. While Edward had emerald green eyes, Alice's eyes were a lighter shade of brown, the color of fallen leaves at the very end of autumn. She had full red lips, and a small pixie shaped face. She walked around with a cheeky smile most of the time.

I haven't been in Forks that long, but my friendship with Alice has become stronger. While many people in the boarding school found me weird and awkward, Alice embraced my weirdness, not to mention she was also use to the fact that I tripped over my own foot at a daily basis.

I looked at her now as she played with her GHD hair straightener, her face filled with concentration.

"So, are you planning on doing anything about Jasper?" I started, Alice looked up, surprise visible in her brown eyes. She put down the hair straightener and started fiddling with her nails. For a second I thought she wasn't going to answer. I was about to just let it go when she looked up with this innocent look in her eyes.

"I don't know Bella, I really like him, but there's nothing I can do about it" I stared at the fragile girl in front of me. Normally, Alice oozed confidence. Her very aura affected me in such a positive way, that seeing her looking broken came as a bit of a shock.

I moved closer to Alice and gave her a tight hug. "Why don't you try telling him how you feel? For all you know he could feel the same way!" I said in a sympathetic voice. Alice hugged me back, and just shrugged. "I don't know Bells, I really like him, but I'm scared he might not feel the same way…" she said, sniffing just a little bit.

I knew exactly how she felt, but at least, she still had a chance. Edward didn't even bother giving me a chance. I sighed, I really should just let go.

Alice, loosened up and shook her body. "Ahh, okay, we need to stop this, pronto! We came here to have fun, not talk about boys, so lets get to it eh?" she asked cheerfully. I had to admire Alice, despite everything, she still puts on a brave face.

I hopped off the bed and the slumber party began. I turned the radio on and a classic slow rock song by Bryan Adams came on. Alice and I both stared at each other, I grabbed a brush and started miming to the words, Alice followed.

**Look into my eyes -you will see **

**What you mean to me **

**Search your heart - search your soul **

**And when you find me there you'll search no more**

Alice started building up, and I followed , pretending to play the guitar. I closed my eyes and pointed at the space between the silver floor lamp and the queen size bed.

**Don't tell me it's not worth tryin' for **

**You can't tell me it's not worth dyin' for **

**You know it's true Everything I do - I do it for you **

Alice and I were both swaying to the music, while Alice kneeled on the floor and pointed towards the heavens. Then we both fell in to fits of giggles.

We were both being so ridiculous, but we kept singing without a care in the world. Screaming out the words. Then as we were both building up our climax, Alice's window shattered and a baseball bounced around the room and stopped in front of my feet.

We both jumped, suddenly on alert. Alice gave me a slightly panicked look as she nodded towards the window. I held her hand as we headed towards the gigantic window. The curtains were already opened.

We both hid under the window sill, and slowly crept up. My eyes narrowed as I saw the people below. Jasper and Edward were both laughing and pointing towards us. Then horror dawned on me. They must've have seen our little display just then.

Alice and I both looked at each other, slightly red in the face. We both headed towards the door and ran towards the back of the house where the boys were waving at us.

"Oh my god! Your jerks! Why did you do that for? Esme is going to kill you!" Alice screamed out, slightly hysterical, covering her red cheeks with her palm and looking up at the hole that ran right through her window.

Alice looked so furious and slightly flabbergasted. Jasper smiled sheepishly at her. That when I first saw a similar twinkle in his eyes. His face lit up as he took Alice in a hug. I knew right there and then that he liked her too.

I heard chuckling beside me, as I turned sharply my gaze met with Edward's green eyes. I glared at him, I watched as he raised his hands in surrender. "Hey! It wasn't my idea, it was Emmet's idea! Seeing as the two of you were so engulfed in your own little world, we thought we felt like _crashing _in" he smiled his famous crookedly smile. I nearly moaned, but I pushed it down.

I laughed sarcastically, "Wow, you guys are such genius!" I said through narrowed eyes. By that time, Alice was already heaving. She suddenly jumped Jasper, meaning to just tackle him, but instead she fell on top of him.

Emmet laughed even loudly. While I gave Edward a side way look. I coughed out loud as Alice and Jasper stayed in that same position for some time just staring at each other. I smiled started forming in my lips.

I heard Edward trying to suppress a laugh.

"You know what you two? To make it look even effective, why don't you start rolling around on the grass, while Bella serenades the two of you with _The hills are alive with the sound of music…" _He said in a sing song voice, matching his words to the tune of 'The sound of music'

I started giggling then, Alice and Jasper finally remembered that they had company, quickly broke a part. Jasper got up and held his hand out to Alice.

I had to look away. I couldn't help but feel envious. There was Alice, closer to getting what she wanted more than she knew, while I stood next to Edward. Being next to him made him feel so close yet so far away.

I let my hair fall all over my face as I tried to look at Edward from the side of my eyes. I quickly looked down, suddenly feeling depressed. There was that feeling of loneliness again. I swallowed hard and pushed it down. When I looked up, I put on a bright smile and asked if we could all maybe get out of the cold.

We all headed back towards the house. Alice linked her arms through mine, while glancing at Jasper every once in a while. Edward was walking ahead all of us, while Emmet walked with me.

"Sooo" he started, making the one syllable word drag. I looked at him suspiciously, waiting for him to pull something on me, but his question took me by surprise.

"So…You like Edward huh?" he grinned broadly. I felt my face go red, and looked the opposite way. "What makes you think that?" I asked in a tiny voice.

"Well, it's kind of obvious kid" he replied, patting my back. I shook my head decisively. "No, I don't like him!" I said, still feeling a bit flushed. "Besides, what's the point? I over heard you guys talking a couple of weeks ago" I added, smiling bitterly. "What was that he said? _I only date girls with substance?_" Emmet didn't say anything, he just looked down. If I didn't know better, I would have thought he looked a little ashamed. But of course he didn't have any reasons to be ashamed, they were only telling the truth.

I looked ahead and saw that Edward was holding the door open for everyone. Alice, Emmet and Jasper were all having an animated discussion about baseball, while I walked slightly a part from them.

They all went inside, and I was the last one to go inside. As I went through the door, Edward gave me an uneven smile and closed the door behind me.

Emmet grabbed the phone and started ordering pizza for our dinner, while we all decided to just finish off the night by watching Charlie's Angels 1 & 2 marathon.

When the pizza's came we all dug in and started talking about the people from school, while Jasper asked me questions about what I thought about Forks so far.

I made it clear that I hated the rain and snow, anything that could possibly melt and turn to liquid. I noticed that Edward was quiet the whole time while we all ate the pizza's Emmet ordered.

Not wasting any time, Emmet ate the last 3 pieces of pizza and declared that he's going out to meet up with Rosalie.

The four of us were left alone, and there was an awkward moment after Emmet left. Alice decided to break the ice by going off to get the 2 films we were going to watch, Jasper went off with her, leaving me alone with Edward.

I sat on the couch quietly, waiting for Alice to come. Being in Edward's presence, I wanted to appear smart, sophisticated, and witty, but I couldn't even utter a single word. Having him share breathing space with me left me feeling breathless.

I felt the space beside me in the couch flop and I looked beside me. There he was, staring at me intently. His piercing gaze felt like it was burning a hole right through me that I couldn't think straight.

So I decided to make small talk, but found out as soon as I opened my mouth that it was a bad idea. A whole load of gibberish escaped my mouth, so I quickly shut it. Edward was inching closer to me, his shoulders touching mine. I tried to look at anything but the god-like figure sitting next to me. Breathing came in harder as I tried to keep it in control.

Has his eyes always been that green? I found myself thinking. A strand of hair fell across my face, but before I could brush it away, Edward had it in his hands.

Where the hell was Alice? What was taking her so bloody long to get two DVD's?

Edward was playing with the strand of hair like it honestly fascinated him. Then he nuzzled my neck with his nose. I just sat there, trying my hardest not to hyperventilate. I could smell his scent, he smelt sweet, almost like the comfortable winter air that hits you first thing in the morning.

I closed my eyes, I felt my self drowning in his scent, my lungs started to burn. I knew that any second we would be kissing, but I just couldn't let that happen. I tried to pull away from him.

"Umm, Edward?" I whispered.

"Hmm?" He hummed in my ears.

I shivered slightly as I fully turned towards him. He opened his eyes, his green eyes looked so smoldered, that I felt a chill went up and down my back.

"You're sniffing me" I said, pointing out the obvious. Edward chuckled and whispered back "I know, you smell like…" He thought for a moment, "Something very sweet and floral, I can't quiet put my finger on it" I started to blush, if I didn't stop, I'd probably spontaneously combust. He continued to play with my hair.

I just couldn't keep my mouth shut, I inched closer, and sniffed him as well. "You smell good too.." I whispered. He chuckled mildly, so I kept going, "You're presence intoxicates me" I added. Oh lord, why didn't anybody shut me up?

"Is that so?" he purred seductively. I nodded bluntly, he started to laugh. My whole body stiffened. Realization dawned on me, I took notice of how close we were, and pulled away from him.

I started to get up to get as far away from him as possible. I told him he intoxicated me, he just laughed. That was it, I'm going to go and shoot my self.

As I started to leave the sofa Edward grabbed my wrist and pulled me so suddenly that I fell right on top of him. "Where do you think you're going?" He said in a serious tone. I pushed off him and started to walk away, but he just took a hold of my wrist again.

I couldn't take it anymore. I spun around to face him. "This is just a big joke to you isn't it Cullen?" I said in a low voice filled with venom. "You know that I really like you, but you've turned this whole thing in to a game!" I spat out. He was about to open his mouth, but I held up a hand to shut him up.

"I don't think I can be your friend anymore, not if you're always playing with me, leading me on, and then pretty much stamping all over my heart!" I added with conviction

But Edward wasn't listening. He was holding me, and looking at me horrified. "God Bella, will you stop it!" I started thrashing like a woman scorned.

Edward gave a growl, then roughly took hold of my face and lowered his lips to mine. I couldn't move, any moment, I would have fainted. But then my lips, as if they had a mind of their own responded just as roughly.

We both melted in to each other as I wrapped my arms around his neck and he held my waist. We held on to each other, and both started to drown in each others kisses. Then the kiss became gentle, he kissed me as if he was savoring the moment, the pace became slow and I let out a moan.

I fell on the couch with Edward on top of me. Then we heard a slamming of the door and somebody rushing down the stairs. We sprang a part from each other just as Jasper hit the bottom of the stairs. He looked quiet flushed and disheveled.

"Jasper?" Edward asked, with concern in his voice. Jasper stopped in his tracks and looked at the two of us. He gulped consciously, and said "I gotta go, I forgot I was suppose to go to a party tonight" he said with an unsteady voice.

Edward sprung up, gave me one look that had regret written all over it, and ran after Jasper. Once the two of them left, the house suddenly felt empty without them. _Alice. _I got up and ran towards Alice's room where I found her in tears.

"Oh Bells, I messed up big time!" her voice breaking into a sob. "Alice what happened?" Alice startled fumbling with the hem of her shirt then looked up. "I jumped him, and blurted out I liked him!" despite the horrible situation, I couldn't help but break in to a giggle. Alice glared at me.

"Why would you do that?" I asked gently. Alice just shrugged, but then her whole body started shaking. I gathered her up in to a hug. "He-he was being all nice and stuff, so it just sort of came out" she hiccupped sadly.

I patted her back as she kept on crying. "Oh Bella I'm such a stupid girl!" she said blowing her nose on a piece of Kleenex she was holding. I tried my best to comfort her, but nothing I said seemed to be helping anything. So I decided to tell her my own stupidity, minus the rough kissing fest of course.

"Well if it makes you feel better, I told Edward his very presence intoxicated me" I offered. Then Alice gaped at me, I started to turn red again. Then she started laughing, and then I started laughing.

Then I couldn't help it anymore, I started crying too. "Oh Alice, he probably thinks I'm a freak now" I said between sobs, as the roles reversed. Alice tried to pat my back, and I kept on crying.

"How the hell did we come to this? Tonight was suppose to be our own little 'male free' party!" I said in frustration. Alice just laughed and sniffed some more. The rest of the night we just listened to whiny soft rock love songs. Not trying to think about the up coming week ahead.

Just the thought of Edward always brought back memory of that slight look of regret he had on his face.

Did he regret giving me that kiss? If he did, why did he even bother doing it in the first place? Ever since I came to Forks I've been completely different. Always whiny, and I can hardly control myself. Not that I'm saying I had much control before, but the point of me moving here was to gain control and to change for the better, and I thought I achieved that when mum came back, but it seems like I just kept on going downhill.

**Day 29 (Still)**

Alice is in the bathroom right now. I've decided, it's a rather rash decision, but I'm just going to completely wipe Edward out of my life. It will be good for me.

**Day 29 (2 hours later)**

Have been Edward-free for 2 hours now, I'm so proud of myself!

**Day 29 (10 minutes later) **(**A/N **this is nearing midnight J)

Alice just pointed something out to me. How can I be Edward-free when we go to the same school, and are starring in the same play? Somebody kill me!

**Day 30 (1 hour later)**

Maybe I should turn in to a lesbian. I'm going to close my eyes and see if I can imagine making out with Jessica Alba, after all, she is suppose to be the most beautiful thing alive right?

**Day 30 (3 minutes later)**

I CAN'T DO IT! I JUST CAN'T!

There I was trying to imagine myself with Jessica Alba, but then her long brown hair turned in to a bronze color, her warm brown eyes turned to green smoldered ones, and her soft body turned in to a hard manly one, with toned muscles everywhere.

Then next thing I knew, my fantasy of kissing Jessica Alba turned to a fantasy of me in the beach rolling around the sand making out like crazy with Edward.

I'm too obsessed with someone from the opposite gender to be a lesbian. I'm going to bed, before I totally spontaneously combust!

This is all Edward's fault!

* * *

**(A/N)**Hey sorry for the cheesiness with the miming stuff during the sleep over. LoL it's something my friends and i use to do! Well, hope you enjoyed it!! please REVIEW!!

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	9. Chapter 8

**DISCLAIMER: **yesterday I chucked a coin in a fountain, held my breathe and wished I could be Stephanie Meyer. i turned purple and nearly fainted :( But I'm still plain old Rose!

**Just not good enough**

**Part 8**

**Day 32**

So much for having an Edward-Free week. It seems that everywhere I go, I see him. I saw him during lunch, and between classes.

Alice wasn't doing that well either. It's been 2 days since that whole sleep over from hell took place, and during those two days Jasper had acquired himself a girl friend from the deepest pits of hell.

Personally, I've never seen the girl, so I have no idea whether she's nice or not. I heard from the vine that Jasper met her at some random party, which I could only guess was that party he went to with Edward two nights ago.

But honestly, I want to kill him right now. Alice was hurting badly, and it was all his fault. When we over heard Jessica Stanley during English class yesterday, I couldn't believe it, and neither could Alice.

I tried to corner Jasper between classes, but it seems that even _he _was avoiding me. When I finally got a hold of him before lunch time, I pretty much had him against his locker, so he had no means of escape.

I gave him a smile that was completely without humor before gunning him with questions. "So I heard you have a girlfriend now, do you?" I started. I know I was coming on too strong, but I had to know.

He backed away even more only to find that he was trapped. He looked a little terrified, mostly because he's probably never seen this part of me before.

I watched as Jasper nodded nervously. I stood there for a while, taken a back. Then I took a deep breath and pushed the anger down.

"Look, I couldn't give a shit if you decided to get a girlfriend, but I wish you would have grown another testicle so you could have had enough balls to tell Alice you didn't want her properly" I said in a grumble.

I knew that people were starting to look at us, people were stopping what they were doing just so they could hear what I was saying to Jasper.

"Look, I never said I didn't want her! It's just I thought she was just kidding around, incase you haven't noticed, Alice is always kidding around, I thought she wasn't taking me seriously!" he said in a firm voice, starting to sound defensive.

I was starting to lose my temper. "What makes you think that? Alice likes you." I said bluntly. I watched as Jasper's face turned from defensive to total misery.

"She likes you, A LOT, now she's all broken, and I can't stand it, she's my best friend Jasper. Now I don't know why you would think Alice would joke about something that big, but if you truly do like her, then you better start groveling _bud" _I said, poking his chest, and making the last word _pop!_

There was a commotion happening in the crowd as Edward pushed his way in. I gave him the dirtiest look I could muster, and walked off the opposite direction. I kept walking, Edward hasn't exactly been that friendly either.

He hasn't spoken to me ever since the kiss, and there was no way I was going to start any time now. We didn't have and play rehearsal yesterday, so I didn't see him much. But in the morning I saw him walking down the hall way with Tyler.

I gave him a smile and I was about to say hello to him but he kept walking like he didn't even see me. Then I heard Tyler laugh, "What a loser, I can't believe your sister actually hangs around her!"

I think I might have had a heart attack and died without noticing because after that, I just felt like a zombie, no heart, and completely shallow. I tried to hold back the tears, trying to remember how to breathe every now and then. I became an empty shell for precisely an hour, until I overheard Jessica talking about Jasper and his new girlfriend.

Suddenly my own troubles went away as I saw Alice's face collapse. She walked out of English class, followed shortly by me. We spent the whole morning behind the school. Everything about yesterday was grey. The weather was grey, our moods were grey, even the usually happy Ms. Culling was grey.

Today wasn't any better. As I left Jasper in the hall way, I went straight towards the library where I know nobody would bother me. I walked past the gymnasium, past the posters that advertised the school dance that was going to happen in two weeks, and straight inside the quiet and gloomy library.

I made a beeline towards the classical fiction where nobody ever went to and grabbed a copy of sense and sensibility by Jane Austen. Jane Austen was one of my favorite author's, the way she depicted romance was just so light, and sweet, that sometimes I wish I could have it just as easy as her characters.

They fall in love, get rejected, but still somehow ends up with a happy ending. I started reading the book and got as far Elinor meeting Edward Ferrars. As soon as I saw the name Edward, I gave a muted scream and threw the book across the floor.

Oh, I was a poor soul who flinched at the mention of his name.

I quickly went to pick up the book, but as I was about to bend down and get it, another hand reached for it before me. I looked up, Edward was standing in front of me, looking utterly gorgeous. He had a frown on his face, that I wanted to kiss away.

Oh lord, just walk away.

"Why would you throw away a good piece of literature like this?" he said, pointing at the book. I just grunted and snatched the book away from him. I walked back towards the shelf ignoring the librarian who told me off for making too much noise (I was just stamping, geez it's not like I was stampeding around the halls or something).

I returned the book from where I got it, and started walking away, completely ignoring Edward. "Bella-" he started, but I completely cut him off.

I wasn't going to let him have a word in, let him see how that felt like. "Why would you kiss me then suddenly treat me like shit?" I asked fiercely. "Do you get kicks out of it? Or I know!" I yelled out, "Maybe it's an ego boost, knowing you pulled one over Mike!" I stared him down, while he had the nerve to look ashamed.

"You know what Edward? I can't figure you out, so please, just stay the hell away from me!" I all but screamed that out. The librarian peeked towards us and shhhed us. I started to turn but Edward got a hold of my wrist, "I don't think I can do that" he said in an honest voice that made me turn to look at him.

His eyes was so filled with disgrace and longing that I just wanted to wrap my arms around him. "That kiss…" he started, he suddenly got all of my attention. "That kiss Bella, it left me feeling so…Overwhelmed and all of these other emotions I've never felt with anyone" he said, with real sincerity in his voice.

I gazed at his green eyes intently as I tried to figure out what he was trying to say. "So you're saying that you like me?" I asked in a small voice, Edward looked at me then shook his head. It took me long to process why I was suddenly looking down, and why my eyes was suddenly starting to tear up.

The feeling of rejection washed over me, stabbing at me like a million pieces of needles. I held back a sob and tried to control my breathing. I kept looking down, hoping to god that he would just leave me alone.

"Bella?…" I heard Edward's velvet voice. Still I refused to look up. He lifted my chin and forced me to look at him. As he saw my face, his expression twisted to a pained expression.

"That didn't come out right, what I meant was, I don't just like you…I honestly think that what I feel for you is something more than an ordinary crush" he whispered. I looked at his green gaze doubtfully.

"But…We can't be together Bella. Surely you know that right? We are completely a whole world a part, I don't think it could work out-" I didn't give him a chance to finish. Clearly it just wasn't going to happen.

Despite the fact that he may feel something for me, it was never a good sign when the boy that you liked started to think up of ways of how your relationship couldn't work out before it even started.

I shook my head bitterly, "No, Edward don't say it, I-I don't think I really want to hear it," I whispered. I looked at him with a sad expression. "I understand, you're a jock, everybody expects you to go out with someone totally hot, which I'm totally not, so just save it, you've done enough damage" my voice cracked in the middle.

I turned around and started walking slowly towards the door. I walked past the cafeteria, past the gym, and through the entrance. Once I reached outside, I let out the tears, for once I've stopped crying, there was no way I was ever going to shed another tear over Edward Cullen.

.:.

* * *

I sat right at the front for biology, far, far away from Edward. I ended up coming back to school after a very long walk.

When Edward walked in our eyes met and he gave me a sad smile which I didn't return. Mr. Varner was still not in class, so people chatted with each other. I wasn't in the mood for talking, so most of the time I had my head on the desk, pretending to sleep.

That's exactly what I was doing when Mike Newton walked inside our classroom, flicking his blonde fringe on the side and giving me a bright smile.

His face fell as soon as he saw my slightly bloodshot eyes. As he sat next to me, I saw Jessica Stanley give me an evil glare.

"Hey Bella, are you alright? What's wrong?" He asked worriedly. I smiled, Mike can be very annoying at times, but I could tell that he actually really does care. I just shook my head "I'm fine Mike, what's up?" he gave me a doubtful look but decided to go on.

"Well, some of my friends from outside of school has decided to go to the beach this weekend, I was wondering if you'd like to come? You can take Alice too if you want. Were just going to be at La Push" he offered. La Push was a little reservation towards the coast, only a couple of minutes drive from Forks, a small community of native Americans lived there.

I really didn't want to go, but what was the harm. I needed to get out anyway. I'm sure Alice would appreciate it too. But I was a little doubtful about the weather, after all, the beach shouldn't be _wet. _It should be dry, and the breeze should be warm, not _crisp and cold. _I shivered at the thought of going.

I was about to flat out decline when Mike seemed to have read my expression. "Trust me Bella, it's not going to rain, the forecast said so. It should be sunny! So please come?" He asked, turning his boyish puppy dog charm to full blast.

Oh what the hell, I agreed. I watched as Mike smiled eagerly. I smiled at his expression.

Then as if a sudden gush of wind just swept in, I felt the back of my neck prickle. I slowly turned around, and my eyes clashed with Edward's angry green gaze.

I sunk down on my chair slightly. He had no right to look pissed off.

* * *

**Day 33**

Alice agreed to go to the beach. It turned out that the whole 'Jasper-getting-a girlfriend' thing was still eating her up. I didn't dare tell her about what I did to Jasper yesterday. It turned out that she's been avoiding Jasper as well. Rebuffing all of his attempts on trying to talk to her, and avoiding him the best she could.

I told Alice want went on at the library between Edward and I and she gave out a very impolite growl. "It's his stupid ego, oh I wish he's regretting it now, knowing you just said yes to hanging out with Mike Newton!" she said huffily.

I just gave Alice a sad smile. She looked at me, seeming to read my expression. "Come on Bella, do you think I'll bail out on you as well?" she asked. A part of me wanted to say yes.

I just shrugged. "Well, you know Alice, I'm not exactly Cinderella. I'm not pretty at all, and people are wondering why the hell you would want to hang around someone like me" I said in a dejected tone.

Alice gave me one look and came to me. "Bella, shut up okay? You're gorgeous! Don't you ever doubt that. Besides I'm hanging out with you because you happen to be the coolest person I know. Everyone else is so artificial! Don't listen to what other people say!" she said, slightly boosting up my confidence.

"Bella, you're my best friend you know that? You've been here for me, and I love you for that. And as for my brother, forget him. He can be so dumb sometimes, let him wallow in his own misery" she added.

I just smiled, I was glad for the darkness of the night, or else Alice would have seen the tears running down my eyes.

Alice and I sat on the roof for a while, just staring at the stars. Each wishing for something that may never happen.

* * *

**Day 34**

Why did I ever agreed to do this stupid play? Why didn't I just back down when I had a chance?

You probably don't know what I'm crapping on about but it's official, playing Juliet in Romeo and Juliet sucks. I came in for rehearsal today, tagging Alice along with me. When we arrived, we saw that Edward dragged Emmet, Jasper, and Rosalie along as well.

Alice and I were talking about an episode of 'Charmed' when the words from my mouth just died down as soon as I saw them all sitting at the edge of the stage. I felt Alice's whole body stiffen at the sight of Jasper.

He got up and looked towards Alice as if expecting her to bolt. But I took Alice's hands and we both walked hand in hand. I swallowed slightly as I felt all of their eyes on us. I looked briefly at Edward, he wasn't looking at me at all. He was fidgeting with a coin. I sighed and walked towards the other side of the auditorium.

Alice and I took seats and waited patiently for Ms. Culling to come. We heard footsteps coming towards us, I looked up and saw Emmet heading for us. I looked at Alice, but she just shrugged and went back to looking through my copy of Romeo and Juliet.

"Hey guys, what are you doing all the way up here, come over to our side" he said lowly, so nobody else could hear. I just scrunched up my face and gave him a smile. "Nah Emmet, were fine here, but thanks for asking" I replied.

I honestly didn't feel like sitting within Edward's line of vision, even though he can pretty much see us from where we sat. But I didn't care, better far away than close.

Emmet just shrugged and bounded back to everybody else. I gave Alice a brave smile and mouthed "Are you okay?" she nodded and did the same thing for me, I shrugged in response.

I saw Mike coming over and sighed, Alice stared, and quickly looked down and muttered 'crap' under her breathe. Mike was nice and everything, but sometimes he's just so _eager_ it's scary. He's definitely different from all of his friends though.

He wasn't afraid to show his fascination with me. A difference between him and Edward. As he got a closer the door crashed open, and Ms. Culling walked in, with her usual dramatic entrance.

"Mr. Newton, please sit down, and don't scare the ladies!" she said loudly. Mike turned red, and sat down. I heard Emmet's crowd snicker slightly. I just shook my head and tried to concentrate on what was happening.

Ms. Culling grabbed a chair and sat on the centre of the stage and cleared her throat.

"Looks like we have new helpers, thank you guys for volunteering, that's the only reason that I can think of to explain why you're all here" she said enthusiastically at the new faces in the auditorium.

I saw Jasper and Emmet exchange a look while Rosalie just gracefully stood up and walked out of the auditorium. I rolled my eyes. Ms. Culling caught me, and smiled, "Well Miss. Swan, I never liked her much either!" she said in her booming voice.

"So before we can start, I'm here to inform you that we are doing ACT 2 SCENE 2, so quickly, quickly! Look through your script right now! Time is of the essence!" she yelped, making chopping noises with her palm.

I quickly looked through the script and stared at it blankly. Suddenly my whole face felt numb, and my heart started beating double time. I sat there so quiet, that Alice had to pinch me to bring me down to earth, "What is it Bella?" she asked. I didn't answer, she took the script away from me and looked at the open book. Then I watched as her lips formed a quiet 'oh'.

"That's right my children! We are doing the famous balcony scene where we will be working our little chemistry! The audience has to believe it people!" she said. Nothing she was saying made much sense to me. All I knew was that I was staring at the slanted writing on the bottom of the page after Juliet makes a very long speech; _he kisses her. _

I gulped and looked up and surely enough, Edward was staring right at me, as if penetrating my soul.

Ms. Culling got the two of us to stand up and recite the line before the kiss, and had us stare at each other.

I stood right next to Edward awkwardly, hesitating to put my hands on his shoulder when he grabbed a hold of it and _kissed it_. If we hadn't been surrounded by people, I'm sure I would have peed my pants.

He looked at me deeply and whispered "Lady, by yonder blessed moon I vow, That tips with silver all these fruit tree-tops-" and that was when I was suppose to cut him off, but it was starting all over again; the intoxicating feeling of having him too close to me.

I tried to stutter out my lines, but none of it made sense that Ms. Culling gave out a frustrated growl. "Do it again!" she yelled. So we did, and time and time again, it happened, I kept stumbling on my lines, and I could hear Emmet go hysterical by the minute.

I swore if he laughed one more time, I would deck him. Of course he laughed again, and of course I didn't deck him, have you seen the size of him? He's as big as a bear. So instead I ignored him and tried to really put my self in Juliet's shoes. How she would tell her lover not to swear on the moon, because of it's constant changes.

I stepped away from Edward, and closed my eyes. When I opened them, I stepped closer to Edward and let him take my hands, for once really concentrating on what he was saying. Edward took a hold of my hand again, and this time I got even closer to him, which took him by surprise.

The whole time I kept my eyes focused solely on him;

"_Oh swear not by the moon, th'inconstant moon,_

_That monthly changes in her circl'd orb,_

_Lest that thy love prove likewise variable"_

I was so close to him, that I could feel his heart beat. We seemed to be so lost in our own moment, Edward lifted my chin and whispered, _"What shall I swear by?" _his Velvet voice leaving a trail of goose bumps running up and down my spine.

By then we were both so engulfed with each other, leaving behind the characters that somewhere in between, we _became_ Romeo and Juliet.

"_Do not swear at all;_

_Or if thou wilt swear by thy gracious self,_

_And I'll believe thee." _

I softly said against his ear, then as if I became possessed by the character, I let my lips brush along his cheek, and I saw his face get closer, until our lips sort of hovered above each other.

I completely forgot about our audience. Next thing I knew I heard clapping, I quickly sprang away from Edward, too embarrassed to look at him in the eyes.

"Bravo! Bravo! That was intense! Somebody pass me a paper bag! I think I'm going to hyperventilate! What a chemistry!" Ms. Culling said enthusiastically, clapping very loudly. There were some laughter coming from the crowd, and I heard Emmet whistle.

I looked up to see Edward giving Emmet a dirty look. Then when he turned towards me, I quickly looked down. I felt like a fire was burning my cheeks. I quickly hopped off the stage as Ms. Culling gave us a 15 minute break, where I rushed straight to the bathroom and washed my face with cold water.

That was pure torture from the 7 levels of hell.

So now I'm lying in my bed, writing all of this down, hoping for this week to finish up as soon as possible before I completely lose my mind.

* * *

**Day 34 (5 minutes later)**

Who was I kidding? I've got an outing to go to over the weekend. Oh, Mike is going to be unbearable, I just know it. All because I said yes to going with _him and his friends _to the beach.

He acted like some over protective harpy after rehearsal today. Hanging around Alice and I for too long. Edward looked like he wanted to skin Mike alive, while Jasper didn't look too happy either.

So nope, not looking forward to the Weekend at all.

Somebody shoot me!

* * *

**A/N: **Hey guys!! Thanks for all the reviews last time!! keep them up please!! **Oh, and please read my other fanfic!! It's an imprint story **:) So anyway, tell if you liked this chapter, or if you have anything that you want me to put in there!! Thank YOU once again for those who favorited this story, and added it on their alert list! Thanks guys! keep it up! _REVIEW REVIEW!_

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	10. Chapter 9

**Old rivalries**

**Part 9**

_**Day 36**_

Since when did Mike become such an egoistic pool of lump? Oh right, he's always been like that (insert rolling of the eyes). Going down the beach was both painful and freezing. My suspicions were right, the air really was crisp and cold, with a little added bit of crispiness.

Sure it didn't rain, but that doesn't mean I didn't freeze my ass off. But I'm not saying the day didn't surprise me by being so…_productive_.

Alice had picked me up early in the morning, insisting that she drove, seeing as she 'Didn't want to be seen with the big red truck' I instantly took offense, but Alice just laughed and put her arms up in defeat. "Hey slow down, I do admit it does have it's certain charm, it's very…" she thought for a moment, then when the right words came to mind, she gave me one of her cheeky grins, "Antique!" she said, slurring her words.

I rolled my eyes and dropped my bag in the booth of her dad's black Mercedes Benz. (Hey, don't ask me what kind of model it is, I don't speak car language. I can only understand _broom broom) _

I took another look at the car and was blown away by how _shiny _it looked. The Cullen's had a ridiculous taste when it came to cars. Alice once mentioned that her whole family liked speed. That would definitely explain Edward's psycho driving.

I got inside the car and let my head roll back on the seat, not looking forward at all to seeing Mike, and whoever else he's dragging. Alice on the other hand was much more enthusiastic. I think this whole deal with Jasper has finally gotten to her head. She's gone insane.

"Think about it Bella, maybe there will be boys there who could be better than Jasper and Edward!" she had clapped happily. I just shook my head and gave her a sideways look. "Don't get your hopes high yet" I said gloomily.

"Aw come on Bella, cheer up, for once, just forget about Edward. He'll figure out sooner or later that it was definitely his loss the moment he sees you with another boy" she added. I rolled my eyes once again, "He always sees me with Mike" I said lazily. Alice sniggered slightly, then looked out the window, "Well, Mike doesn't really count does he?" she asked.

I couldn't agree more to that.

I opened up the small compartment to look through the CD collection rather than listen to the radio, I was surprised to find a copy of Debussy inside. "Alice…I never thought you for the classical type" I started slowly. I looked towards her, surprise still etched on my face.

She just chuckled and eyed the CD in my hands. "That's not mine, that's Edward's. Dad must have borrowed it off him" she said cheerfully.

I looked at the CD then at Alice, still pondering what I just heard. "He listens to _classical music_?" I asked in a surprised voice.

Alice nodded, "You'll be surprised. If you go inside his room, one side of it is filled with CD's ranging from heavy metal to classical. He loves music, he plays the piano you know?" she said, laughing slightly at my surprised face.

Actually the last bit didn't come as a surprise, he could sing too. I heard him singing inside the auditorium when he thought that there was nobody else looking.

God, that day felt like it happened a million years ago. I can't believe I've come this far, having Alice as my best friend and having one of the most popular boys in our year level ask me out. I never would have thought about this in a million years.

_Too bad it's the wrong boy who asked you out. _Came a sad voice inside my head. I brushed the feeling of longing that kept coming back to me.

I haven't spoken to Edward since that disaster in the library. I've done all I could to avoid making eye-contact with him. I'm surprise I've managed to avoid him what with the rehearsal happening and everything, but it seems God has taken pity on me.

All week Ms. Culling just got us to carry in the sets and to set up the music that was going to be used. If we had to do anymore of the blasted balcony scene, I really will shrivel up and die.

We've reached the town, Alice was just pulling out outside Mike's parents sporting goods store when we saw Mike standing outside a van filled with about 7 teenagers. I looked at Alice worriedly. "He doesn't expect us to ride that thing, does he?" I asked, my mood getting darker by the second.

"No…" Alice started, "Huh, Not if I can help it, come on Juliet, time to turn your acting skills up" she said distractedly as she tried to park the car.

_Great, just great. I can't lie to save my life_, I thought to myself. Which was true, I tried once, I always turned red, and my nose always flared up, worst of all I couldn't keep eye contact.

Alice and I hopped down, putting on a smile as Mike headed towards us grinning from ear to ear. "Bella! Hey!" he greeted, then to my utter most embarrassment he embraced in a hug, and gave me a sloppy kiss on the cheek. Which by the way, note to self: Must put disinfectant on it.

I tried to break lose from his tight grip, awkwardly bowing my head so his arms sort of slid off my neck. "Wow Mike, you sure came prepared, who's van is that?" I asked uncomfortably.

I know I'm being horrible and all, I already feel guilty, but Mike was just so…_In your face, _that at times, I feel like I'm suffocating, which is completely insane, seeing as he's not even my boyfriend.

He looked proudly at the van and blushed a little. "Oh! That old thing? It's my dad's, he decided to lent it to me for the day" he beamed. I made an oohing sound while Alice spluttered right next to me that I had to elbow her.

"You guys are riding with us yeah? The guys has been dying to meet you!" Mike said excitedly. I gave him a smile and snuck a worried glance towards Alice. But Alice just gave me a wink and came between us.

"Actually Mike, were going to have to take a rain check on the van, I promised dad that I won't leave the car alone" she said, biting her lips. Alice looked so cute that Mike looked slightly dazzled. "But we'd love to meet your friends though!" she added quickly. Mike looked slightly disappointed but he just shrugged and led us towards the van full of teenagers.

There was seven of them, five guys and to my dismay, Lauren and Jessica were there. Jessica gave us a fake smile and started eyeing Mike up. I gave Alice a sideways look, and I could tell that unfriendly words were hanging just at the very tip of her tongue.

"Guys, this is Bella and Alice, girls, this is Adam, Jason, Riley, Rolan, and Jasper" at the name Jasper, Alice flinched a little bit. All of the boys smiled nicely towards us, all their eyes sparked with interest towards Alice. Surprise, surprise.

I gave them all a smile and made small talk as Mike went inside the store to talk to his parents. The boy named Rolan gave way too much attention to Alice, he was too friendly. Alice on the other hand appeared oblivious to his charms.

She kept staring at the boy named Jasper. No doubt comparing him to the other Jasper. Poor guy didn't stand a chance. He looked far too prepubescent. He had long hair, too pale of a skin, and a very bad acne problem. While Jasper in the other hand, I'm not saying that I have a crush on him, but he is an eye candy, easy on the eyes.

He was lean and muscular and with a disarray of blonde hair, he was also very tall and fit. No wonder he's the captain of the baseball team. Edward played baseball too, but his main sport was track.

I've seen him train before, I've snuck behind the track and field training area and had spied on him on my first day. I didn't mention it, because thinking about it now, I realized just how stalkerish it was.

The door of the store opened, and Mike finally came out, heading our way. "Is everybody ready?" he looked around and smiled, then he turned to Alice and I, "Girls just follow us alright?" he said, then gave me a wink before he went on the driver seat of the van.

I had chills run up and down my spine, and trust me, they weren't the spine tingling one like the ones Edward gave me. I just shook my head and jumped in the black Mercedes.

When Alice jumped in, she gave me a look then started giggling. I just shook my head and just stared out of the window. The sooner this day finished, the better, I thought to myself.

We started the drive towards the reservation. It turned out Alice knew exactly where we were going, she started driving almost as fast as Edward and over took the van where she waved at Mike's shocked face.

She stepped on it, sharpish. We were soon speeding down the high way, with Alice turning up the music, and me clutching my heart, feeling like I was about to have a heart attack any moment.

When we arrived, I got out of the car and slammed the door then started heaving. "ALICE! You're almost as bad as your brother!" I yelled out, close to hyperventilation.

Alice just laughed and started taking our bags from the booth as I recollected myself.

When the van arrived all of the boys were cheering and clapping, while Alice took a bow. I just shook my head unbelievably. I was wearing a normal t-shirt, seeing as it really wasn't that cold in town, but as soon as I stepped out of the car, I started shivering all over the place.

The cold hitting me with impact. I squealed and jumped back inside the car to grab my hoodie jacket. When I stepped out, Alice took a hold of my hand and started dragging me towards the beach.

I was either going to freeze to death or get frostbites. Alice started laughing as I clutched myself together in order to keep warm. "Don't be such a drama queen Bella! Save it for Romeo and Juliet!" she said cheerfully. I really was going to kill her one of these days!

We walked down the beach to find the perfect spot to put all of our stuff down. We found a spot with burnt up black logs, where the remainder of a campfire still laid. There were logs all around it, so we all set our things down and sat around the burnt up logs.

Mike got up and brandished a lighter and some lighter oil. He poured some on the burnt up pieces of logs as everybody else added to the firewood. I watched as the fire licked away at the pieces of wood like it was a delicious delicacy.

I drowned out all of the talking and got a little lost that I didn't respond straight away when Mike directed a question at me. Alice poked my ribs and I jot up. "Aw Alice, what was that for?" I whined. She pointed at Mike and I looked at him confused.

"Nothing Bella, I was only asking if you were hungry" he asked dejectedly. I instantly felt guilty for not paying enough attention. "I'm sorry Mike, and yeah I'm pretty full thanks, I already ate" I answered sheepishly.

Mike gave me a radiant smile and just nodded. It seemed everybody was getting along just fine, but then Lauren started whining about being bored. So we all decided to go for a walk around the rock pools. Originally I declined, knowing me, I'd probably fall in through one of the halls and have a sea urchin bite my ass.

But Alice started whining as well. "Bellllaaaa, you havvveee tooo commeee!!" she said, dragging every word, and when I refused, she used her innocent puppy dog eyes on me. I watched as her lips started to quiver, and her eyes went as round as saucers. Which was such a heartbreaking sight.

I grunted and got up hastily. She squealed and gave me a hug. "You are the best friend in the world!!" I just smiled weakly and nearly whacked myself on the head for being so lame.

We started walking around the edge of the forest. I carried a stick around with me, poking at the dirt. The boys were shoving each other around, while the boys stayed as far away as possible. The boy Rolan started flirting shamelessly with Alice, while she was to polite to get rid of him. We kept walking around, I flinched when I saw the bushes start shaking.

We all stopped on our tracks and stared at the bush nervously. I hid behind Alice, preparing myself to bolt. Mike decided to take the stick away from me and started heading towards the bush slowly.

He started to poke at it, and a sound escaped, followed by an angry hissing that sounded a lot like a raccoon. The girls screamed when a gigantic raccoon stepped out of the bushes.

I jumped and started running towards the beach where another group were just sitting around a bonfire talking and laughing. I heard running footsteps behind me and I looked back, everybody was right behind me, mostly the girls, including Alice, while the boys chased them with the raccoon, laughing their asses off.

I squealed some more when Mike accidentally dropped the raccoon, and it was running after him at a fast phase. We were all heading towards the same direction. I wasn't watching where I was going when I tripped over a random log lying on the sand.

I gave a yelp and completely tripped over, creating a domino effect. Alice fell behind me, followed by Lauren, then by Jessica, and the rest of the boys. I laid there for a while then quickly got up, watching everybody entangle themselves.

Then I looked up and realized that Mike had headed towards a different direction, while the raccoon followed him angrily.

I couldn't keep my amusement as I looked at the ridiculous scene playing out in front of me. At first I started to giggle, then the giggles turned to a full on stomach cramping laughter. I held my stomach to stop my self from toppling over.

Alice joined in, until the rest of our group joined in. I had tears in my eyes by the time I realized that we had fallen on top of the other groups bags. I turned to apologize but my smile sort of disappeared as soon as I saw who stood in front of me with an amused expression on his face.

"Hey" I said lamely. Edward stared at me, as if drinking in my presence. I looked around to see who was with him and realized it was pretty much everybody from the jock table. I smiled awkwardly and felt silence where I thought Alice was.

I looked at her and realized that she was looking at Jasper staring at her. I swallowed slightly and looked at Edward right in the eyes.

_Had his eyes always been that green and penetrating? _I thought to myself. "So, what are you guys doing here?" I asked, trying to sound cold. Edward noticed my tone and looked a little crestfallen.

Then we heard more footsteps coming from where we came from. I turned to look and realized that they were natives. They had to be the local La Push teenagers. There were five of them. The one in the middle smiled at me as they started heading our way.

"We heard some racket, are you guys alright?" the one in the middle said. I noticed that he had a warm smile, and a certain charming roundness. He was taller than the rest of the boys, he had long hair that went up just above his shoulder, and dark warm eyes. He looked about our age.

I smiled back at him and shrugged, "I'm fine, I don't think Lauren is though" I said, nodding towards Lauren who had scratched her knees. I heard Tyler mockingly laugh at her, some boyfriend he is. Lauren gave him a filthy glare.

Then one of the reserve boys came and inspected the wound, holding it intently, Tyler's smirk was wiped off his ugly face.

The boy who smiled at me started talking, "Seth, do you think you could run down to your house and fetch Leah? Get her to bring the first aid kit" he said worriedly.

The boy inspecting Lauren's knee smiled down at her and spoke up, "yeah sure Jake, if I can pull away long enough from Sam" he said, rolling his eyes.

The boy called Jake turned towards me and smiled, "Names Jacob, the one who just went is Seth" he said warmly. The other guys behind him introduced themselves as Quill, Paul, and Embry.

Another boy popped in carrying the raccoon in his hands, followed by Mike, who looked slightly sick. I tried to stifle a giggle at the look on Mike's face. I looked towards Alice to see if she saw, but she was still busy eyeing Jasper up.

"Hey! I found Nemo!" he said, referring to the raccoon as he patted it lovingly. All the girls flinched as he ran a hand under the raccoons face.

"Jared, I told you to cage that thing!" Jacob said darkly. Then as if the raccoon had a mind of its own, it hissed at Jacob, and I took a step back. I felt two hands on my back as I started to lose my balance again.

I turned to find Edward looking down at me, then suddenly I felt the hostility in the air as Edward looked up coldly at someone behind me. I turned to look and found him glaring at Jacob.

The two of them were staring at each other as if they wanted to have a duel, fight till the death, right there and then. I laughed nervously and started moving towards where Alice stood. But Edward had put a firm hands on my shoulders.

"Ed-Edward! Let go!" I hissed. It seemed that Jacob heard it too because he moved closer, raising the tension in the air.

"Why don't you let her go Cullen?" he said coldly. His eyes shooting daggers at Edward. Then I started to feel uneasy.

What the hell was going on?

"Why don't you mind your own business Black?" Edward asked, just as coldly.

"What if I don't want to?" another question

"You don't want to what?" came Edward's question. They were both driving me nuts!

Alice turned towards the both of them and told them to just shut up. "You're giving Bella a headache!" she said, which was partly true.

"We came here to have fun, well _we _came here to have fun, I don't know what the hell your doing here, are you stalking me or something?" she asked, with her eyebrows raised.

"Oh yes, cause I just have to keep a look out for my little sister after all, who knows maybe she's secretly dating" then his eyes darted out at all the nervous looking boys with us.

"Ahhuh, I came here so I can have my wicked way with all of these boys, they were all very good" she said the last part tauntingly at Jasper who flinched. Then Edward started turning red. Alice took one look at his face then rolled her eyes.

"Oh, get a life Edward, you're just worried Bella might pull" she said loudly. I furiously turned red and screamed out "Alice! Leave me out of this!" then quickly looked down as soon as everybody's gaze turned my way.

Then she looked at Edward's blushing face, "Oh, you know it's true, your just jealous" she said slyly. Then Edward looked at her the rolled his eyes.

"I am not jealous!" he said, and with that he walked off. I stared at his back, dumbfounded. For someone who swore he wasn't jealous, he was doing a very bad job of hiding it.

Jasper smiled at me apologetically and went after Edward. Then I felt a searing pain in my heart. I felt guilty somehow. I was so tempted to run after Edward, but I stayed rooted on the spot.

"Alice, that wasn't very nice…" I started. Alice just shrugged, "It got rid of him right?" And with that everybody just went on doing whatever they were doing like nothing happened.

The rest of the jocks joined us anyway, for once mingling with everybody else. I became so preoccupied with my own thoughts. I felt sad for Alice, a part of me thinks that she's only doing this to forget about Jasper, but I know that all of the smiling, and all the laughing was just for show.

She was as miserable as I was, I could feel it. Despite the short time I've known Alice, I feel like I've been friends with her all my life. I knew it when she was sad or in pain, despite the fact that she's always hiding it with a smile.

I was so absorbed in my own thoughts that I didn't realize somebody sit next to me. "Hey, Bella right?" a warm voice said next to me. Jacob sat right there, smiling down at me. My god he was tall.

"Your friend Lauren should be fine, Seth tended her cut, seems like Leah couldn't make it, she's a bit pre-occupied with Sam" then he started coughing, "heh, if you know what I mean" he said, cocking his eyebrows at me.

When I didn't answer he continued. "Sorry for sounding random, but are you Charlie Swan's daughter?" he asked good naturedly. I smiled, surprised. "Do you know him?" I asked, he nodded and grinned. "He's best friends with my dad, you might know him, Billy Black" he finished. I looked at him and instantly recognized him as the little boy who use to run around naked in our little inflatable pool during summer before Renee and Charlie divorced.

I looked at him in awe, "Oh my god! Jacob? As in the Jacob Black who use to run around naked in our little inflatable pool?!" I squealed, and jumped on him, giving him a bear hug.

Alice became Alert and was looking at Jacob and me. But I took no notice, I just continued squealing, and Jacob just laughed. "How have you been kid? I haven't seen you in ages! Last time I saw you, you were butt naked, screaming for your dad to buy you an ice cream!" I watched as Jacob turned red. I just giggled and pat his back.

Suddenly I got all of his friends attention. They were all laughing as they asked me to tell them about the running around naked bit. I was only too glad to tell it, seeing as Jacob didn't really mind.

I can't believe it's really him, he's grown up so much. "What have you been up to these past years?" I asked cheerfully. Suddenly my mood had increased a great deal.

"Well I've been busy with sports and everything, but since track season hasn't started yet, I've been working at the shop, fixing old cars and stuff" he smiled at me, I just nodded at everything he said, "Oh yeah, you should come by for dinner or something, drag Charlie with you! I've been working on this car, I'll have to show you sometimes!" The whole time, we just had light conversations, and I watched the La Push boys joke around.

But somewhere in between, a question kept lingering in my mind. Why did they hate each other so much? Jacob and Edward I mean. The air between them was so hostile. I must've been drifting off again when Jake shook me. I turned to him, looking confused.

"What's up Bella? Why the silence?" he asked, honestly worried. I pondered for exactly 5 seconds before asking the question that has been burning in the back of my mind.

"What was that before? You and Edward seem to hate each other so much?" I asked cautiously. I watched his face, trying to read him, but when his face broke in to a smile, I let out a breath.

"It's the usual guy stuff you know. We're enemies when it comes to running" Alice picked this moment to chime in. "No kidding, Edward beat your butt 3 years in a row" she said lazily. Jacob gave her a cool look but as soon as he saw the same innocent look Alice gave me before, he softened, and looking slightly titillated, he smiled at her.

"It's true, he has beaten me a couple of times, but this year, I'm going to kick his ass, tell him to watch it" Jacob said, rather blankly. I couldn't help but be tempted to read between the lines.

I had so much questions to ask, but I thought I might as well save it for Alice. Seeing as she knew some stuff already.

Time went by pretty quickly. Alice and I decided to say goodbye. Jacob made me promise to keep in touch, which of course, I did.

On the way home, I couldn't fight the itch anymore. "So tell me the deal with Jacob and your brother… Please?" I pleaded. Alice gave me a look and just smiled.

"I knew you were going to ask me" Alice replied.

I waited for her to talk, anticipating what she was going to tell. "Jacob is still stuck on the past. His ex-girlfriend hooked up with Edward at a party. Edward didn't know the girl already had a boyfriend, or else he wouldn't have done it" The thought of Edward kissing another girl left me feeling low, but I kept on listening.

"Lets just say that Jacob didn't take it so well. During the district athletics last year, he attacked Edward in front of everybody. He started calling Edward a leech, and a fight broke out. Since then every time they saw each other, Jacob would resort to snide remarks, while Edward would call him an adolescent dog. But it's been quiet lately" she continued, "Probably because it's the first time they've seen each other in a very long time"

I tried to process everything Alice said. But I just can't imagine Jacob as the violent type, Edward even less. But by the looks of things, there are still a lot of things that I don't know about.

Now that I know all of this stuff about Edward, I can't help but realize just how much I don't know about him.

* * *

**Day 36 (11:00 PM)**

I just got woken up by a really weird text message from Edward.

"Bella he's bad news, I hope you know that.

Xxx

Edward"

What the hell does he mean? I didn't missed the three x's either.

* * *

**a/n:** Thanks for the reviews you guys!! I love you all! Thanks for those who alerted this. And for those who realized that there was no kissing scene in the balcony, thanks for clearing that up for me...I actually knew that, no really lol! I'm not lying. I actually had the book opened next to me, lol. But thanks so much for pointing it out :D Please keep reviewing, and hopefully you guys don't hate this chapter...It has it's slow sides I guess. **Oh yes, I asked you guys to read imprint on, but meh I didn't get much reviews, please go read it!! it's actually started to build up now...it's very juicy, lol well till my next update!!**

xo

rose


	11. AWAY FOR A WEEK : AN

**NOTE FROM ROSE**

HEY GUYS, THANKS FOR ALL THE REVIEWS

BUT I HAVE SOME BAD NEWS, i'M NOT GOING TO

BE ABLE TO UPDATE ANYTIME THIS WEEK. I'M

GOING TO BE BURIED KNEE DEEP WITH WORK.

IT'S PRODUCTION WEEK NEXT WEEK, AND I'M

OFF TO THEATER CAMP WITH THE REAL MS. CULLING

SO I REALLY HOPE YOU GUYS KEEP SHOWING YOUR

SUPPORT. I'M REALLY NERVOUS ABOUT MY PERFORMANCE

WELL, WISH ME LUCK! KEEP UP THE REVIEWS!

XXXXOOOXXX

ROSE


	12. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer: **I've spent a week on theatre camp, I'm still not Stephanie Meyer…Merde!

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First of all, thanks for those of you who bid me good luck! Secondly Thanks for the review! Wow! I finally have 90 reviews!! Doing a crazy dance Thanks for those who just alerted and added this story to their favorites. You guys rock! Thanks a whole bunch guys! **Now lets make it over a hundred**! And I really hope you like this! :0) Hope to hear from all of you again J!!

**

* * *

****Winter Dance Fiasco**

**Part 10**

**Day 40**

The last few days had passed in quiet a blur. The winter dance was in less than two weeks, keeping the energy within students very high.

I hated it.

The winter dance had to be the worst idea I've ever heard. I absolutely hated it. I had nothing against high school dances, but that was back when I was invisible. We had dances all the time in my old boarding school with the neighboring all boys school, but back then nobody liked me enough to actually asked me out. I never minded it that much.

But somehow my worst nightmares has come true. Practically all of the boys in my year level kept eyeing me up, making me feel very uncomfortable. I walked through the entrance this morning with practically all of the jocks smiling at me offering to carry my books.

I tugged on my pigtails uncomfortably as Tyler came up to me and started chatting to me like we were best friends. Then he kept brushing my arm 'accidentally' while I kept staring at him like he was on drugs.

Then as if that wasn't bad enough, I got my first ever invite to the dance. A very popular senior came up to me while I was chatting to Alice in front of my locker and handed me a red rose and asked me to go to the dance with him.

The orange juice I was drinking went down the wrong pipe and I spluttered and coughed all over the popular boy's jacket, which gained me a dirty look and a tsk as the boy, who I recognized as Trent from Bio class, walked away from me like I was some infected loser.

I stared at his retreating back as Alice started giggling uncontrollably. "Is he crazy? Why would he want to go with me?" I asked, staring incredulously at the red rose Trent had given me.

Alice just laughed, "I think the whole world is finally seeing you the way I can see you, which is hot!" she said cheerfully. I cocked one eye brow at her, she just rolled her eyes at me. "Oh don't you look at me like that. You realize that your coming to the dance right?" I gave her a confused look, "I am?" I asked slowly.

I looked as Alice's relaxed expression turned to excitement. "Of course you are! There's no way I'm going to let you miss it! Besides, you're going to have to say yes to one of the boys!" she said, looking at someone behind me.

"Oh yeah? And why do you say that?" I asked sarcastically. She shrugged and whispered in my ears; "Because Mike Newton is headed your way…"

I quickly spun around and to my horror, Alice had been right. I watched as Mike started walking towards me. I looked towards Alice with panicked eyes. "What do I do?!" I asked hurriedly. I kept looking as Mike kept getting closer and closer. Alice just shrugged and didn't say anything. It looked like I was on my own.

I wanted to throttle Alice right there and then but I had no time, Mike was already standing before me, grinning boyishly. I tried to fake a smile, and tried even harder not to grimace as Mike greeted me with a big hug.

I patted his back awkwardly. I could feel a pair of eyes watching me from a distance. I tried to look from the corner of my eyes and nearly had a heart attack when I saw Edward's smirking face.

How dare he look so cute and smirk at me? I had thought to myself. Edward wore a white t-shirt that had the word 'believe' sprayed across it. I warily stared at the word that had been underlined.

I gently pushed Mike away and gave him a sweet smile. From the corner of my eyes I saw Edward's face grow dark. I snorted to myself, and Mike noticed. I quickly fabricated a cover up, "Sorry, I just remembered a joke, so what's up?" I said reeling the conversation towards a different direction.

I heard Alice squeak, I looked at her, about to ask her if she was fine when I saw Jasper heading our way. Alice quickly became alert and exited stage left. The whole time Mike and I just watched.

I could tell that Mike was getting a little curious so I decided to reel him in again. "So were you going to tell me something?" I asked, a little too happily. Mike smiled rather shyly and nodded.

"I was just wondering if you wanted to go to the winter dance with me?" he asked, his voice sounding a little bit too confident. I heard a snigger from the spot where I'm pretty sure Edward stood with Emmet and Rosalie.

I turned red and tried to come up with some excuse. A part of me wanted to say I was sick and dying of some fatal disease but when I heard another snigger I turned towards Edward to find him close to hysterics.

I felt the anger rise in my blood as I shot Edward a glare. I turned towards Mike once more, before I knew it I had opened my mouth without thinking much about the outcome.

"Oh I'm sorry Mike, but I already promised to go with someone else" I said apologetically. I heard the sniggering suddenly stop, I gave Edward a side ways glance and saw that he was no longer smirking.

"Oh" mike sounded dejected. I looked at him and instantly felt guilty. He looked up and tried to smile brightly, "That's okay Bella" he said softly.

Awww

I felt so bad.

"So who are you going with?" he asked cautiously. I said the name that first popped inside my head. "Jacob Black!" I squeaked.

Mike looked both disappointed and surprised. "Jacob Black?" he asked, his eye brows slightly furrowed. I gave him a sad smile, and froze a bit, waiting to see if he believed me. When he smiled again, I felt relief wash over me.

As he walked away another thought came inside my head.

I just stupidly told one of the popular boys that I was going with Jacob Black. Jacob Black who I haven't spoken to ever since we saw each other down at La Push.

I knew I should have just kept my mouth shut!

As Mike disappeared from my view I quickly turned towards where Edward stood. He didn't look too happy.

Well he didn't have the right to look like he was about to explode. I turned and went in search for Alice.

I needed to talk to someone, I needed to tell someone about my stupidity!

**.:.**

I found Alice in the library loitering about in the classical fiction area. I crept up behind her as she flicked through a copy of 'Pride and Prejudice'. I poked her sides and watched, amused, as she jumped and squealed.

She quickly looked around and found me trying to hold my laughter in. "Bella!" she whined. I just stuck my tongue out. "Yeah well, that's what you get for leaving me alone with Mike Newton!" I said jokingly.

Alice looked at me apologetically. "Aw I'm sorry Bella, you know how I am around Jasper…" she said sadly. I sighed and gave her a comforting hug.

"Alice, you can't keep doing that. Your going to have to face him sooner or later. Besides, I heard on the vine that he's broken up with Cruella" I said, saying the nickname we had for Jasper's girl friend.

The sad thing was, we were both sad, sad souls. We've never even met the girl, so we don't know if she was nice or not. But we both found out that making fun of the anonymous girl was so much funnier, even though we both knew that it was wrong to judge someone before we even met her.

"I doubt that that's even true" she said softly, giving me a small smile, "I've actually seen her Bella, I saw them together two days ago. They looked pretty unbreakable to me" she said. I heard the sound of undoing in her voice, but she quickly caught it and brought back control over her own voice.

I could tell that she was trying hard not to cry. I closed my eyes and gave her an even bigger hug. "Shhh, Alice you know that you don't have to pretend with me" I whispered softly.

Alice started shaking and for once, she let her guard down and let the tears fall. She bit her lips to stop herself from making a sound. We both flopped down on the floor as Alice told me about seeing Jasper and his girlfriend on the mall.

"I was just walking around trying to look for a dress for the dance, you know just in case we do end up going, I was browsing around a shop when I saw him come in. He was flicking his hair the way only he knows how, and Bella you have no idea, my heart did this flickering thing that it always does whenever I saw him" she started, her voice was still shaky, but her words were still understandable.

"When he walked in I thought he was alone, but then this brunette girl walked in and wrapped her arms around Jasper's waist. I just had to get away, but how could I? So I ended up hiding behind some of those horrible wonder bras…Bella it was so terrible!" she said in broken sobs.

"I don't get him you know? I honestly thought that he liked you…" I whispered softly. And that was true, I honestly thought Jasper really liked Alice, unless I imagined all of those little glances he would give Alice, and of course his face after I attacked him.

But it seems like he's got serious boy disease, urgh, just like Edward.

"I don't know how many times I'm going to say this, but it seems like you and I have been repeating this A LOT lately, so I'm going to say it again; Forget him. It might be hard, but he's being very stubborn" I said gently. We just sat on the floor not talking for a bit, when Alice's head shot up.

"What happened with Mike?" she asked. I made an exasperated sound then looked at Alice. "Oh nothing. He just asked me to the dance and I very nicely declined-" I was in mid sentence when Alice broke me off, "What? How did you reject him?!" she asked surprised, "Wait, I haven't finished yet!" I replied.

"Like I was saying, I nicely declined and stupidly fabricated the lie that I'm going to the dance with Jacob Black, which I obviously am NOT. So as you can see, I'm screwed. It's all Edward's fault!" I said all of this very fast, without pausing for a second. I felt light headed after a while as I watched for Alice's reaction.

She started giggling, then started fully laughing. I gave another exasperated sound and clutched my head. Alice stopped laughing. "Wait, how is this Edward's fault?" she asked, sounding a little confused.

So I told her about Edward laughing at me. "Oh Bella, I honestly don't get it. I don't understand how he can pull such reactions out of you! You are so taken in, I don't get it. It's Edward!" Alice said. Well she wouldn't understand now would she?

After all, Edward is her brother. She doesn't see him the way I see him. He's got a mysterious air about him, not to mention a smile that drove me insane.

When I told Alice this, it was clear that she wasn't taken in. "Yeah, well he wouldn't be so mysterious once you've heard him fart" she frowned. I definitely didn't need to hear that. But who cares right? I have to accept the good and the bad in him.

But the problem was that Edward didn't exactly want me the way I wanted him. I felt that suffocating sensation in my heart once again as I tried to push the sorrow down.

If he didn't want me, then that's fine by me. I can find someone else who I can love and will love me in return, Edward is not that great, nope, he really isn't.

Oh god.

I think my nose just grew with every lie that I told.

The Bell went and Alice and I piled out of the library. I headed towards my locker and decided I might as well call Jacob and actually ask him for a favor. I have to go to the dance with him, even if I have to grovel.

I was the first one in the locker bay, as everybody were still piling out of the cafeteria, so I had privacy. I dialed Jacob's number and waited. There was a click and a deep voice greeted me from the other side.

"Hey, Jake, is that you? It's Bella, chief Swan's daughter" I threw in the last bit. Who knows, maybe he's forgotten all about me. I frowned, and hoped to God he hasn't.

"Hey, hey! This is a nice surprise. What's up Bells?" he asked. I smiled to myself and thought of words to say to him.

"Um well, I'm kind of stuck…Mike Newton asked me to the dance and I had to tell him that I was going with someone else, and well…Your name kind of popped up…" I said slowly, blushing slightly.

I heard chuckling on the other side and I started to get just a little bit defensive. "Hey, your name was the first one that came to mind alright!" I said huffily.

He was still chuckling. I started biting my nails nervously. "So what do you want me to do about it?" he asked. So that was it. I took a breath and spoke, "Can you please take me to the dance?" I said in a tiny voice.

There was silence on the other line. Oh god, he's going to reject me. That's what I thought until I heard laughing on the other side. "Of course! I'd love to! Look I have to go, class is starting up again, I'll talk to you soon alright?" he asked. I just said yes, and nodded happily.

"And Bella? Thanks for thinking of me first" he said softly and with that I heard a click and the line went dead. I stared at my phone for a while. I knew that my life just somehow got even more complicated.

I heard footsteps and I quickly turned to find Edward's retreating back.

I've said this before, but maybe it really is time to move on…

I'm just so fed up. Oh well, I got to go. Alice is going to come around here soon. We are going shopping for our dresses. It turned out that Trent had asked her to go with him. She agreed in the conditions that he doesn't make any physical contact with anything on her body other than her hand.

Alice can't stand Trent, but when he asked her, it just so happens that Jasper was standing just a couple of feet away, just within earshot.

* * *

**Day 41**

Surprisingly shopping with Alice hadn't been painful. It was actually fun. It definitely got my mind off of a few things, EX: Edward. But as usual Alice had been very pushy. I didn't have much cash, but I ended up not spending my money at all. Seeing as Alice was the one who kept spending.

I even refused to have her pay for my stuff, but she insisted. And trust me, once you got Alice started, there was no stopping her.

We were walking around looking for dresses for a while. We were in Port Angeles, but I was getting very frustrated. Nothing in the shops seemed to look good on me. While Alice on the other hand looked good in anything she tried on. I gave a frustrated huff and looked to my left and was stunned by how pretty one dress looked.

It was a boob tube corset that had laces going down all through out my spine. The glitter design on the top created dream-like patterns, as the torso went down in to layers of chiffon and satin, mixing two shades of blue together, stopping just below the knees. In my mind that's how I Imagined a fairytale dress would look like.

I must have started to drool when Alice finally noticed where my eyes were directed. "Oh my god Bella, that dress is perfect for you!" she gasped. She ran towards the dress and delicately handled it and gave it to me.

I stood there like an idiot for a while, just staring at the dress. Alice pushed me towards a change room and helped me with the corset.

As soon as she had me laced up, she slid out of the change room and waited on the other side patiently.

I looked at my reflection on the mirror, I was speechless for once.

I walked out of the change room and walked towards Alice. She gasped and started giggling. "Bella! Oh my god! This is your dress! I don't care if it's expensive, I'm buying it for you!" she said. And who was I to argue?

I looked at myself in the mirror. The dress felt like it was made just for me. It even fitted perfectly.

So now I have a dress and a date. Bring it on!

* * *

**Day 41 (Much later)**

Okay, why did I have to speak too soon? Jacob is going to walk out of the dance as soon as he realizes that I can't dance. i tried once, you know take ballet lessons and all, but i ended up with a twisted ankle. The dance studio I use to go to had to kick me out of the class nicely. Making up crap that the dance class was already full.

What do I do?!

Knowing me, I'll probably trip over and create a whole snowball effect where everybody else falls on their butt because of me.

_Oh Merde! Merde! Merde!_


	13. Chapter 11

**DISCLAIMER: **

Any recognizable characters are owned by Stephanie Meyer.

_R&R_

* * *

**A/N**

Hey guys! Thanks for the reviews from last time. I'm sorry for the late update! Guess what? My performances went awesome! I can't believe how everything went well. I just got home from bumping out (cleaning everything) it was awesome! So anyway, I want to ask a favor from everyone who added this on their story alert list, can all of you please, please, pease leave a review? I know a lot of you leave reviews already, but I still really want to know some feedback!! It makes me type faster! THANKS SO MUCH!

* * *

**All messed up**

**Part 11**

**Day 45**

I called up Jacob today. Ahh, he's nice and all but boy, he's so cocky. But that's fine, for precisely one hour I forgot all about Edward…Well, almost. I had a major spasm when I realized I've been talking to Jacob for about 45 minutes and I have my Romeo and Juliet rehearsal.

But as usual I got sidetracked as Jacob told me that Paul and the boys were over, and Nemo the raccoon was chasing Seth around. 15 minutes later, I practically had to beg for Jacob to hang up.

He made me promise to call him again later to talk about winter dance related stuff. I honestly think that I'm starting to like Jacob more and more. He was so down to earth and funny. He could never be Edward, but maybe he could help me you know…

Urgh! I must get that out of my mind. Imagine if I went out with Jacob just so I could forget about Edward. I would feel so bad, not only am I using him, but I'll probably end up losing his friendship in the end.

So, must not think about evil little plans such as going out on a rebound.

I jumped as I saw the time, I was already late. I ran as fast as I could and slammed right in to Charlie.

"Bells, you really should be careful! Renee is going to kill me if you get injured!" he said roughly.

"Sorry dad, will do! Can't talk, already late!" I said, my wordings were slightly distorted as I ran out, trying to tie my shoelaces together.

It came as a miracle that I didn't trip or bang my head against the pavement as I scrambled towards my truck.

I slammed the door, and quickly reversed out of the driveway. I was contemplating on what to do or say if Ms. Culling forced more kissing on Edward and I but not too long, I realized that I was already pulling over at the school car park.

I freaked out and stepped on the breaks. I stopped and listened to my breathing for quiet sometime. I knew Edward was going to be there. I didn't care about him anymore, so it was completely illogical to be freaking out over a guy I clearly didn't like anymore.

If there was more kissing then I'd damn well kiss him…As an acquaintance, if that was even possible. I had finally came to grips with reality…Sort of.

I've decided to move on, and I'm serious this time! I haven't seen Edward in a while now. I haven't even made eye contact with him. Not that he's trying that hard either. Sometimes I would catch him staring at me with a sad look upon his face, but it was his choice. He didn't want to be with me. I'm not going to force anything on him.

I'm done with sulking.

So I straightened out, parked my car and took a deep breathe. I was going to go in there, act my little heart out, and act cool and nonchalant, then pretend that Edward Cullen was a prepubescent git, with too much of a pale skin, and a far too skinny physique.

I hopped off my truck. Nervously playing with the zip of my jacket. I was already about 15 minutes late, and I knew for a fact that Ms. Culling hated tardiness.

I reached the auditorium and hesitantly opened the double doors. I reluctantly looked inside, trying to make it inside without being noticed. But the sight that greeted me made me halt in my tracks.

Edward stood in the middle of the stage holding Lauren very closely, their faces only inches apart. I stood there for a matter of moments not making any sound. I was about to walk out the door, when I heard the double door slammed.

I flinched slightly as I felt a burning sensation crept up in my neck. I slowly turned to find the whole cast members and backstage crew looking at me like I just grew two pairs of legs on my head.

I tried to look at anything but Edward and Lauren. Ms. Culling emerged from out of no where, looking slightly ticked off at me. "Naughty, naughty Ms. Swan! What have I told you about lateness? We were forced to use poor Lauren because you weren't here on time!" she said in her loud echoing voice. I slowly walked up and tried to take a seat, when I walked past Ms. Culling I mumbled my apologies and promised it would never happen again.

I bounded towards where Alice sat, and waited for everybody's gaze to leave me. I looked towards Ms. Culling expectedly.

"Well aren't you going to join Mr. Cullen on stage Miss. Swan?" she asked impatiently. I looked towards Edward and Lauren, trying to hide my annoyance. "Nah, I think their doing pretty well" I replied coldly.

Unfortunately my earlier hope to see Edward as some prepubescent git totally backfired. He was anything but.

He looked utterly eatable in his Romeo get up. Anybody who had to wear those ridiculous tights would have failed miserably, but for some weird reason, he just looked delectable. I grumbled loudly, my good mood from when I spoke to Jacob completely shattered.

Ms. Culling was smiling freakishly at me, baring all of her teeth as she walked towards me menacingly.

"Miss. Swan, please get your butt on stage before I have to personally physically drag you" she said in a pleasant voice, but I didn't miss the evil menace lurking behind her voice.

I gave Alice a worried look, Alice just gave me a horrified look as she pushed me off the chair. I slid off the chair and reluctantly walked towards the stage where Edward stood impatiently.

If there was an award for the most awkward moment, this definitely won the price.

"Geez Beela, you're early!" he said sarcastically. I gave him a cold glare, he smirked. I looked at him up and down, letting my eyes wonder until it reached the part which I knew made him uncomfortable.

"Wow Edward, you look like your suffocating!" that wiped the smirk off his face as he grabbed his tights just below his torso. I smirked coldly and turned towards Ms. Culling. She explained what we were doing and it turned out we were going over the scene where Romeo first sees Juliet at the masquerade ball.

I took one look at the page, and realized…more kissing. Since I was already on a roll, and I know I'm starting to sound like total cow, but I raised my hands.

Ms. Culling looked at me with one raised eyebrow. "Do I really have to kiss _him_?Because if you don't mind, _I really don't want to" _Of course I was lying. And my smartness earned me a punishment.

Ms. Culling took it seriously and sent Edward and I outside by ourselves to work on being Romeo and Juliet, saying that we need to get over our awkwardness. I frowned and started heading out, followed closely by Edward.

We kept walking towards the empty cafeteria, the whole time not speaking to each other. I was far too annoyed, and I didn't want to look at Edward. As soon as we found a table at the far end of the cafeteria, I sat down and buried by head between my arms and pretended to sleep.

I felt Edward sit next to me quietly. We didn't speak for a couple of minutes, I knew that he was very much aware that I was awake.

"Do you really mean it?" came his quiet question. I noticed that it was completely void of emotion. So I looked up and saw that he looked upset and even paler than usual. I had to look away. This was getting a little too much.

"Mean what?" I knew what he meant, but I decided to play stupid. He looked at me and I blushed slightly. "You know what I mean!" he said uncomfortably, "What you said to Ms. Culling!" his tone was edging towards irritation.

I didn't want to say anything because I knew my voice was going to betray me. So I just shrugged and inched away from him. But he wasn't having any of it.

I felt him get closer and closer. He was looking at me with a solemn look in his face. "Well that's just too bad, because I really want to kiss you right now" he said in a low voice. His face got closer and closer. I wanted to protest, but my voice felt like it was being blocked by something very big and round. The passage hole through my nose closed up, and the room started to spin.

Edward's expression turned from uncontrollable to worry. He could see that I was having trouble breathing. He grabbed my cheeks between his hands and brought his face closer. "Bella…Breathe" he said softly. I closed my eyes, trying to control my breathing, all the while my face started to burn from the feel of his soft hands.

I was very much aware of his sweet scent. His scent was intoxicating, _he was intoxicating. _

When I opened my eyes, I found that his lips were only inches from mine, and the worried look was no longer there.

His lips met mine, sending a chill that raced up and down my spine, leaving me breathless. I closed my eyes as our lips consumed each other, reveling on the sweetness of it.

He stroked my cheek as his tongue sought mine out. I was starting to get lost in the moment when he finally let go of me. He wrapped an arm around me as I held on to him slightly.

Not too long, reality came roaring back at a speed of a bullet. I turned away, telling my body to move away from him. I can't believe he just kissed me! _I can't believe I just let him_!

After all that crap about not falling for it over and over again, I can't believe I fell for it again. I fought the urge to whack my head as waves after waves of emotion came roaring in my heart.

I couldn't help it anymore. Tears started rolling down my face and I started sobbing uncontrollably. I felt Edward wrap his arms around me, trying to hug me to him. I pushed him away and got up abruptly.

I started walking away hastily, ignoring the anguish in his voice as he called my name. When he caught up with me, I felt his hands on my wrist.

I tried to push away as he gathered me to him, I tried to push away but he wouldn't let go, his grip on me was far too strong. I finally stopped struggling, and sort of melted in to him.

I couldn't stop crying, why couldn't I stop crying? I should be happy! Edward was there, he was holding me, he wanted me, and he just kissed me. Then why wasn't I happy?

"Let go of me…Please, I don't want to. Just go away! Just- please…" I trailed off. My voice was cracking all over the place, it was wrong, everything was wrong. But why did something so wrong feel so bloody right?

Edward had his face on the crook of my neck, holding on to me tightly. "Why the hell not?!" his voice was gruff, "I like you. I admit it. I can't help it! I might have been in denial before, but I'm not going to let just anyone take you away from me!" he said angrily.

I shivered slightly. I felt a cold hand tug at my heart, but I ignored it. I shook my head. "I can't Edward, I just can't…" I said in a small sad voice. I tried to stay strong, just so I could say the words that I knew was right, but why? Why did it feel so wrong saying it?

"We kiss, then you ignore me, and treat me like crap. It's too much for me to handle. How do I know that you're not just going to walk away from me again?" I said quietly. All the while Edward was shaking his head.

I just couldn't. So I looked up and my eyes met his. "I can't do it Edward, I'm sorry. I'm not saying that I'm going to go out with Jake, but I've been hurt too much in the past. You've been yanking me back and forth that I'm surprised I'm still sane. I can't go through that again" I said sadly, but he was still shaking his head.

His green eyes were filled with anguish as he kept on holding on to me. "I wouldn't put you through that again, I promise…" he sounded weak. This was the first time I've ever heard him this way. It broke my heart to see him this way. But it had to be done.

I shook my head and closed my eyes. I pushed him away, as soon as I realized that his grip became weaker. "I'm sorry. But you said it yourself. I always knew that I wasn't good enough for you. Everybody can see that I'm not good enough, so please, lets just leave it at that, can't we just be-" Edward's face looked sulfurous, any minute he looked like he was going to erupt when he cut me off, "Don't you dare say that you just want to be friends! You and I both know that that isn't the case here!" he barked.

"Besides, at the rate were going right now? There's no way we can be friends! I can't even look at you without wanting to do stuff with you" he said in a low voice.

I shivered slightly. I was starting to get desperate. And he was looking at me with such smoldering looks that any minute I would cave.

So I played dirty, and went a little below the belt. Absolutely contradicting myself earlier. "Well you're too late. I'm going to the dance with Jacob…" he knew where I was going and he closed his eyes, trying to project an even breathing, I wiped the tears away from my eyes, and gathered the courage I needed. "Jake likes me Edward, he really does. He likes me, he gets straight to the point, and he doesn't play with my head" I said in a much stronger voice. I let the last words linger as he looked at me intensely. I gathered momentum before striking the last and final blow.

"And I like him too" I lied convincingly.

A big giant silence followed where Edward kept looking at me, looking slightly defeated. Then with as much strength I could muster, I walked out of the school. Ignoring the fact that when I came back for rehearsal on Monday, Ms. Culling would probably kill me for suddenly leaving.

* * *

**Day 46**

There's still a hole where my heart use to be. No phone calls from Edward or Jacob. But then again, why would Edward call me?

* * *

**Day 47**

I skipped school today. I didn't want to face Edward, or anybody for that matter. Alice has been calling me endlessly, no doubt curious. Angela called up to check up on me as well. But I told her not to worry too much.

I know that I was putting a strain on Charlie's life. That's probably why I ended up getting an unexpected visitor today. Dad had gone to work, and I was all alone when I heard the doorbell. I hesitated. Who could it be? Dad was at work, and I doubt Edward would come roaring around here anytime soon.

I heard the impatient ding dong once again, so I grumbled and slowly walked down the stairs. I reached the door and squealed when I saw Renee standing there.

She smiled brightly at me at first, but once she saw the state I was in (messy hair that looked like it hadn't been washed for ages), she frowned. I jumped on her and hugged her tightly.

"Oh Bella, ever the melodramatic one!" she said in a low voice. I looked up, surprised that there were tears in my eyes, "I am NOT melodramatic!" I said loudly, sniffing every now and then.

Renee just shook her head, and hugged me tightly. "Sure, sure darling" and with that I dragged her inside. We just talked and talked, I didn't even realize just how much I missed her. All this time I felt so alone, seeing as Charlie was always at work. But I still felt thankful. It turned out Charlie had been so worried about me that he ended up calling Renee.

Mum being Mum, she rushed here straight away, Mum to the rescue so to speak.

I told her everything about Edward, and when I got to the part about refusing to go out with him, she frowned. "This boy doesn't sound that nice Bella, if he's really hurt you that much" I shrugged. I didn't want mum to think bad of Edward, but I wanted someone to be on my side for once.

Renee decided that she would stay here, at least until after the Winter Dance. I know! She's staying!

A couple of hours later Renee went and checked if she could cook something for dinner and was appalled when she found the cupboards empty. She shook her head slightly and looked at me pointedly. "What?" I asked sheepishly.

So she went down to shop for some food as I waited patiently, just watching re-runs of 'Friends' on TV. It got to the part where Monica tapped on Chandler's door wearing a turkey on her head when _my _door bell rang.

I looked at the time. It had only been 15 minutes since Renee left. So I got up slowly and opened the door hesitantly. I was taken a back when I found Jacob standing on my doorstep carrying a bunch of flowers.

I gaped at him as I opened the screen door. "Hey Jake…" I said awkwardly. As soon as Jacob saw me, he started grinning. He took in my messy hair, and my power puff girls pajamas.

I blushed slightly when I realized just how ridiculous I looked. He cocked an eyebrow, "Aren't you going to let me in?" he asked. I nodded and let him pass.

"Oh. My. God. What are you doing here?" I asked. For some reason, I was whispering, as if afraid that somebody might here me. Jacob looked around the house, then bobbed down to my level. "Why are we whispering?" he asked in a hushed voice.

I straightened up and started laughing. "Look sit there, I'm going to go and shower, I'll be back!" I said hurriedly. I ran up the stairs, my heart on my throat. I wanted to scream, but I couldn't.

I ran quickly towards my room and got some change of clothes. I went inside the shower and turned the faucet on. I sighed when the warm water hit my tensed up body. I don't know what Jacob was doing, but he was downstairs, waiting for me to finish my shower. I showered as fast as I could, hopefully I could get rid of him before Renee could even come back. But as I was about to finish changing, I heard screaming from downstairs.

I ran down the stairs and hoped to god that nothing was wrong. I reached the last step. My eyes went round as a saucer as I took in the image in front of me. There stood Renee with a long piece of cucumber brandishing it around like a sword as Jacob stood on the sofa defensively.

"Who are you? I know the sheriff! Get out of here now!" Renee screamed. If it wasn't such a serious thing, I would have laughed out loud. I shook my head, "Mum, put the cucumber down and relax!" I yelled. I went to Renee and took the cucumber away from her before she injured herself.

"No! Bella! You don't know! He could be a murderer!" she screeched, slightly panicky. I chuckled slightly. "No mum, he's Jake, and he's my friend. Now let go of the weapon! It's embarrassing!" I said in a hushed whisper, sneaking a peek at Jacob's smirking face.

Renee looked slightly red as she calmed down. "Sorry…" she muttered, looking apologetically at Jake, who just smiled sweetly.

Parentals can be so embarrassing sometimes! I shot Renee a look that clearly indicated 'leave us', which she quickly picked up on.

She stood up and apologized once more, and headed towards the kitchen to get rid of all the grocery. "I'm sorry about that" I said sheepishly at Jacob. He shrugged, "Sure, sure, I'm use to it" he said nonchalantly. I cocked an eye brow wondering what he could possibly mean.

I decided to brush it off and asked him what he was doing here. "Oh, I heard from the vine that you've been away a couple of days now. How are you doing?" he asked sincerely. I looked at him, he definitely took me by surprise.

"Aw thanks Jake, it's nothing, I'm just going through a rough patch at the moment" I said sadly, "I'll get over it"

As I said this, I started to fidget with my fingers. "Yeah, have you broken up with Cullen the leech?" he asked briskly. I frowned and glared at him. Despite the fact that Edward and I aren't the closest friends at the moment, I still didn't appreciate it when people talked bad about him.

"We never went out" I said quietly, "And don't call him a leech" I added. He cocked an eye brow and grinned broadly. "Sure, sure" he said arrogantly. For some reason, I felt that perhaps he wasn't the same boy I spoke to at the beach. All the hatred coming from him completely changed the way I looked at him.

I decided that I didn't want to hear anymore, so I sighed. "Look I'm tired, if you've got anything else to say, say it now. If not, then please leave, I'm tired" I said dryly. I started to get up when Jacob grabbed a hold of my arm.

"Look I'm sorry, but it's just that I really don't like him. But I promise there will be no more mention of the C word" he pleaded in a solemn voice, raising his right hand and placing it on his heart.

I couldn't help it, I smiled slightly. No matter what, for some reason Jake has never ever failed to bring me out of my misery so far. So for the whole day, we both walked towards a park close to my house and played football. Well Jake played, while I failed miserably, falling over my butt at least a million times.

He walked me back to the house after a couple of hours where Renee had dinner done and ready. Jake stayed for dinner. Our conversation over dinner had been animated, and I stayed tolerable the whole night.

When it was time to leave, I felt my control slip just a little bit. I found that I didn't want Jake to leave, because I knew that I might fall to my misery again. I gave Jake a tight hug on his way out, for some unknown reason, I wanted to imprint his scent in my mind. But then the moment was broken as soon as I felt his hands move lower. I froze awkwardly for a moment and I pushed him gently.

"Um, thanks for coming Jake, I'll talk to you later right?" I asked. He looked slightly disappointed. I didn't want anything to happen. I know I led Edward to think that there might be something happening between Jake and I, maybe some day, however, I don't think I could cope with the pressure at the moment.

Besides, I have the dance next week, and Romeo and Juliet is taking a lot of my time. I wish I could just quit, but I've done so much work already. It was too late to back out.

* * *

**Day 48**

I got called to the Principal's office today. It turned out that we were getting a few transfer students. He didn't mention where they were from, but he thought it would be a perfect way for me to meet new people, seeing as I was new myself. I honestly didn't want to have anything to do with it, but before I could refuse, he just ushered me out, and told me I was going to be late for class.

I frowned as I tried to awkwardly twist so I could look at him, but Mr. Johnson slammed the door on my face before I could get a word in. I walked towards the auditorium for my theater class.

Brilliant. I was stuck as Juliet, I'm still miserable over Edward, and there was a chance that I would make a complete ass of myself during the dance. Now I was tour guide for new kids? What's next?

As I opened the door to the auditorium, I wasn't looking to where I was going. I collided against hard muscles, and felt arms snake themselves around my waist to stop me from falling. I looked up and looked straight at Edward's frowning face.

I jumped slightly and got as far away as I could from Edward. "Sorry!" I squeaked, not looking at him. I could still feel his gaze on my back as I watched Mike head towards me. "Hey Bella, did you stab Edward's eye with a pen or something? He looks pissed at you" he said pointedly. I grudgingly noticed the pleased tone in his voice.

I chose to ignore him and sat down. And just like what I expected, Ms. Culling went off the hook as soon as she saw me. I listened to her lecture about dedication for a good 15 minutes while everybody else in the class dawdled along. I blushed intensely as I felt some eyes on me.

I closed my eyes, "I'm sorry!" I said, just a little too forcefully. Ms. Culling gave me one look and shook her head. Then as if nothing happened, she clapped her hands together, signaling the class to stand up. The rest of the class went on just as usual. The whole time I was very much aware of Edward. He sat towards my left, just staring at me.

Once the bell rang I walked as fast as I could out of the class. But it wasn't fast enough. Edward caught up with me and held my shoulders. He spun me around and I had no choice but to look at him. He looked down at me, his green eyes unfathomable. I took a breath as I waited for him to say something.

"Look, I know what you said yesterday. I just want you to know that I'm not giving up…" he said in a low voice. His velvet voice left me feeling breathless as I pulled my arm away. "Right!" I snorted.

I was about to walk away when I felt him right next to me. "I mean it Bella" he said, his voice had a hint of finality. I took one look at his eyes and knew he was serious. I felt the confusion crept up. He reached out and removed a strand of hair from my face and pushed it all the way back.

I couldn't get a handle on this, I was losing control. Everything was a complete mess, how do I get out of this?

On top of everything, the dance is in a couple of days, and I was going to be the guide of a bunch of newbies. I don't how I'm going to handle everything!

* * *

**Day 50**

Oh hell…Oh bloody, bloody hell! With my bad luck, and my tendency to screw things up, why didn't I see this coming earlier? I knew that this whole tour guide thing was a big mistake, and only spelt trouble. Why didn't I mark it as an omen earlier? Oh I'm a brainless girl!

I am now sitting in the conference room, looking at the faces of the two new 'transfer' student. When I walked inside the Principal's office today, I was told that the new kids were waiting for me in the school conference room. So I slowly walked to wards the well lit maroon room.

I took a peek at the two figures through the glass window. Two blonde figures, both sitting bored on the cushioned chair. From where I stood I instantly recognized who they were. The twins.

The only boys who I ever interacted with during my long days in boarding school in the middle of no where. I hesitantly opened the door, utterly anxious to see the faces of the new arrivals.

As soon as I opened the door, the faces from my past smiled up at me. Absolutely identical from each other, Sean and Sam still looking utterly beautiful said in unison "What? You didn't really think that you could easily get away from us did you?"

Sorry I have to go for a walk, I need to get out of this confined space (my room) before I completely pee my pants!


	14. Chapter 12

**disclaimer:** I do not own twilight or any of the series, however I do own Sam and Sean Striker :0)

Hey guys, thanks for the reviews from last time! This is a bit long, sorry if its too long. **But PLEASE REVIEW??**

i LOVE rEVIEWS!

r&r

"EXPELLED: aSK ME THE REASON WHY"

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**It's all in the past**

**Part 12**

**Day 50 still…Later**

I just got back from my walk. I really needed to think. I felt the walls get closer and closer as anxiety sunk in. I needed to get out. As I wounded around the park, past the little kids playing in the park, I felt my heartbeat go back to normal. For some weird reason, writing about Sean and Sam Striker made me nervous.

This diary is fairly new, so there are still a lot of things that you don't know about me. When I left the boarding school, I had wanted to leave everything behind. Despite the fact that I didn't have any girl friends, I did have two other. Sean and Sam went to a neighboring school. They were both odd. I can still remember the first time I met them.

We had the Annual Autumn Gala ball about 1 and a half year ago where the girls dressed up in pretty ball gowns, as we all mingled with the neighboring all boys school students.

Thinking about it now, nothing much has really changed. I still hated school dances, and most of the girls that went to my school were all stuck up so I didn't have anyone to really hang with.

I stood around the food table, just observing everybody wound around each other, their bodies moulded, as the music went on. I watched shrewdly from the sidelines; a lone girl wearing a ridiculous dress that had way too much frills, just frowning. I watched as Victoria Cross the beautiful sophomore from my school danced closely with a handsome boy from the neighboring school. They looked so in synched with each other, like nobody else was really there.

I sighed; beautiful girls like Victoria got everything. She's got the looks, the money, and all of the friends. At the night of the dance was no exception. She had let her red curls wound themselves on the side of her lithe elegant neck, while she wore a tight body fitting black dress that had a non-existent back.

She was beautiful; too bad she was the worst person a girl could ever meet.

I stood at the sides, drinking my punch when Sean and Sam Striker just suddenly spiralled in to my life without any warning. When I say spiralled, I mean they literally spiralled in to me; I ended up spilling red punch all over my white frilly dress. I stood there for a couple of second, horror struck. "I-I- Oh my god!" I whisper-yelled. I quickly faced whoever had tripped on me and was about to give him a piece of my mind when I gasped at just how beautiful he was. Then I became even more stunned when I saw another boy behind him who looked exactly like him. Twins. Hot ones at that!

Two pairs of electric blue eyes were fixed on me as I stood there in stunned silence. One stared at me guiltily, while the other smirked. "Thanks, really, you just made my day!" I said sarcastically. I grabbed a tissue and started dabbing, only to find that I was only making it worst. "What kind of an idiot would wear a white frock in a ball anyways?" one of them said sarcastically.

I looked at the two of them, they were identical. I couldn't tell which was which. One of them looked at me guiltily. "I'm so sorry, it was my fault, ignore Sam" he said, shaking his head towards his twin. I shook my head, and started walking off.

"Hey, I'm serious. Do you want me to take it off so I can send it to dry cleaning?" he asked innocently, holding my wrist. I gave him a disgusted look, then realization dawned on him. "Oh, no, no that's not what I meant!" the nameless twin said, while the one called Sam started laughing. "Way to go Sean!" Sam said sarcastically.

I turned an even brighter red with every word Sam uttered. I looked at Sean, seeing the sincere embarrassment etched on his face. I sighed heavily, "Look its fine, don't worry about it" I muttered. Then I walked away.

I realized that every eyes were on us, including Victoria's and her date's. I quickly exited, ignoring the look of arrogance on her face. When I made it outside I quickly took in a deep breathe. I had thought that I was alone when I heard chuckles. I quickly turned and saw one of the boys from the neighboring school, probably just poked out to have a smoke.

I noticed that he had piercing dark intense eyes, looking at me with an amused expression. I recognized him straight away as the basketball captain James Malone. I felt shivers up and down my spine as he smiled devilishly towards me. He was looking at the stain on my dress, "Looks like somebody got a little excited" he said in a low voice. I huffed loudly and walked away.

I remembered going back to my dorm room, and throwing the blanket over my head, trying to drown out the horrible night I just had. The next day I woke up with a splitting headache and decided to skip my first two classes. I jumped out of my bed and decided to go for a walk. After a while I was at peace, until I heard footsteps following me. I stopped abruptly and turned around slowly.

I screamed frantically as two masked figure came running towards me. I ran as fast as I could, but tripped over. When I looked up I could hear muffled laughter coming from the masks. Then the two figures removed the hideous gorilla mask, and I saw a mop of blonde hair, then recognition kicked in. It was Sean and Sam.

I don't know whether I had said something to them during the Ball, but for some reason after that day, they just couldn't seem to leave me alone. Days passed and I found myself in their company, and enjoying it too. The twins were both funny, and I found that I became closer and closer to both of them, I know! Even with Sam. I found that Sam was much more aloof, and tended to be more sarcastic than his brother, while Sean was the softer one.

I never got bored again. I knew that with the twins, there was always something going on. But then a year passed, everybody had to leave, and I didn't see them for a couple of months. When I did, it all changed. The twins changed. During that time everything was going badly with my parents too, so I was deep in depression. I had wanted to see the twins, but everything had changed over the Summer.

When I heard from one of the girls that the Striker twins were back, I had wondered why they haven't come to see me yet. I waited for a week, still no word from them. So I snuck out in the middle of the night and had went looking for them at the common room. The boys that occupied the common room had gotten use to me always sneaking in, so when I popped in, they weren't too surprised. One of them pointed me towards a cathedral, he said that he saw the twins heading that way for a bit.

I snuck out of the common room and headed towards the cathedral, wary of the building behind me. For some unknown reason I felt very nervous. Why hadn't they said anything to me? I would never figure those two out in a million years. I climbed over the fence seeing as the gate was locked. As I was trying to get over the fence, I felt my pants rip with a resounding kshkkkkk! I looked down at my pants and saw a gigantic hole gaping at me.

**Not exactly **the position I ever wanted to be found in. I jumped over and tried to hide my bottom. The smart thing to do would have been to turn back, and hope to god that I wasn't caught. But I was never that great with common sense. I ran as fast as I could towards the cathedral, and slowly opened the side door. As I stepped inside, I could hear a commotion and two voices I recognized straight away.

I carefully closed the door and walked discreetly towards the altar where I could see Sean's head bobbing, or was that Sam's? I shrugged and kept walking. I was aware of the gigantic hole on my pants. I closed my eyes, hoping they wouldn't notice.

As I got closer I saw what the twins were doing. My mouth went 'O' without noticing. There they were, decapitating a saint's statue. Worst, it was the patron saint of the school. I let out a surprised gasp, Sam and Sean both looked towards me at the same time.

"Bella? What the hell are you doing here?" now that I could hear their voices, I recognized them straight away. The one talking to me had to be Sam, while the one who had their arm around the saint had to be Sean…I think. Sean hid the head straight away, stashing it under the podium.

"Have you gone nuts?! What are you doing with that?!" I asked frantically. Then I started looking around to see if anybody was there. "That's school property!" I was just starting to panic when I realized that Sam was walking slowly towards me. I looked warily at him, he looked like he was going to jump me, and not in a good way either.

"Sam! Leave her alone!" I heard Sean's angry voice. "And keep your voice down!" he said in a hushed voice, sounding nervous somehow. "You know what will happen if James finds out that she's here!" Sean added. Then right on cue, I heard shuffling from outside. They were heading our way.

Sam took a hold of my wrist and yanked me towards one of the confession booths. He pushed me inside and drawn the curtains, shrouding me in darkness. Moments later I heard the cathedral door opened, followed by footsteps. I peeked outside and saw who just walked in. James Malone and at least five other boys I recognized from the polo team.

My heart started hammering erratically. I had heard rumors about James Malone, really weird ones. Rumors of some sort of a club that specialized in vandalism and other things. I heard that when the school staff window at my school got shattered, I heard whispered rumors that James Malone and his gang was a part of it somehow.

As I kept looking, I realized that whatever the hell was happening, Sean and Sam had somehow joined this little group. "What the hell is going on here? You guys were making so much ruckus!" James said coldly. I shivered slightly. If there was anything to describe James, it had to cruel. His sharp eyes, and strong built makes him look like some kind of a hunter.

I could feel my head slowly turning in to this giant balloon as questions after question started popping up in my head. "Sorry, Sam nearly tripped and lose the head" Sean said, giving Sam a nervous look. James looked at the both of them, assessing. He shrugged, "Whatever, just do what you're told, so we can get the hell out of here" he had a very gravelly voice, as if he was just getting over a sore throat.

I shivered as James looked towards the confession booth I hid in. For a second I thought he was going to come and pull me out of my hiding spot, but instead he made an impatient sound as Sam stuck a piece of paper on the spot where the head of the saint use to be on.

One of the boys looked around nervously, his dark eyes darting across the room. The guy with the long dreadlocks held him still, "Stop twitching, you look so guilty" he said in a low voice, sounding amused. I recognized him as Laurent Ryan, the popular student body president of the neighboring all boys school.

As the twitchy boy tried to calm down, James looked around once more before turning sharply towards the door. They all started piling out one by one. Sean and Sam darted a gaze towards my direction, before disappearing through the exit, leaving me all alone.

I waited for a while, until I was sure that they were all gone before scampering out of the cathedral. I never got to see the twins after that, well not for a while at least. The months went by really slowly until another year just went by. There were days when I felt all alone. An even bigger part missed Sean and Sam even more. But after the saint's head incident, they never contacted me anymore, not even a hello, or even an explanation of what the hell happened.

One thing for sure though, I knew that whatever was happening meant bad news, James Malone meant bad news. After a while, weird things would happen, school mascot's head would go missing, I knew exactly who was behind them all. For a while I stayed away, but then, a couple of weeks before I moved away for good, I somehow got involved in all the mess.

One by one, the members of the group got caught out, and day by day it became apparent that there was a snitch. Telling the faculty from both schools who did what and so on. At first I felt relieved, but that feeling soon disappeared as soon as I got an unexpected visit from Sean and Sam Striker.

I was coming back late, I found that the common room was empty, the firelight was kept on. Random books lied on the ground, left by students who had stayed up all night studying.

I was about to climb up the stairs when I felt eyes watching me. I quickly turned around, and my eyes met two pairs of electric blue eyes.

"Long time no see" was all Sam said. I frowned at him. _What the hell were they doing here?_ I looked at Sean, he looked awkwardly back at me, then at the ceiling.

"What do I owe you for this pleasure?" I asked sardonically. I lifted an eyebrow as I tried to stare down Sam. He didn't say anything, all while Sean was fidgeting non-stop. He looked up once he noticed that I was staring at him. He looked like he was going to explode any minute.

"What's wrong?" my irritation soon turned to concern as I took in Sean's nervous expression. "Bella, you haven't been snitching on us have you?" He blurted out. I looked at him surprisingly. Never in a million years did I see that coming. "What are you on about?" I asked slowly, my tone of voice slighting edging towards malice.

"We're all getting caught out one by one, James is losing his head, We want to know if it was you!" Sam spat. I shook my head, completely short for words. "That's just great, now she's turning in to a mute!" Sam frustratingly said. He was shaking me, and my teeth were starting to chatter together. "Sam! Let go of Bella!" Sean said loudly. Sam let go of me, but I fell, luckily there was a couch right behind me.

I looked angrily towards Sam, he was never this violent before, so it must have been something really bad. "I would never snitch on you guys, I know what James is capable of, he creeps me out" I said in a tiny voice, looking down, my feet suddenly felt like the most fascinating in the world.

"See Sam? I told you it wasn't her! Bella would never snitch on us!" Sean said, his voice starting to shake. "Yeah well its too late now isn't it?" Sam said in a low voice. I looked at Sam, then at Sean. It felt like I just got kicked by a horse on the face. My breathing became shallow and distorted as I looked at the both of them.

"He knows doesn't he? You guys told him that I knew, so you all instantly assumed that it was me!" I started shaking. I could feel the tears starting to bubble up on the surface. I looked at the two of them, and I knew instantly that I was right. I looked up in the ceiling, "I'm dead, I am so gone!" I said in a panicked voice. It was so unfair, there was no way I could get away. I had thought that Charlie and Renee hated me, so there was no way I could stay with them. But I had to try somehow.

"Your not going to die Bella, leave it to us!" Sean said eagerly. Despite the fact that they've pretty much sent me to no man's land, I couldn't help it, I wanted to hug Sean, after all he was still my friend. I gave Sam a dirty look, and he looked away guiltily, the hard expression completely gone.

For a while, we stayed up, as they both planned a way to keep me safe somehow.

Now that I think about it, I wonder what would have happened if I stayed around to actually follow the plan. I sat on one of the benches, trying to clear my mind. Both Sean and Sam had wanted to shift me off to England, to stay with their uncle, but I didn't want to get in the way. I know that they were the ones who got me in the mess at the very beginning, but I needed to get away, far away. Where James, the twins, and everybody else, hopefully, would never ever find me. I had hoped really hard, but I guess it wasn't enough, seeing my current mess right now. Sam and Sean had found me. I just knew that the order I've been trying to bring back in to my life will evaporate, I knew it.

It turned out that Sean and Sam both left the school to get away from James's wrath after he found out that I had been expelled. That's right, I never did mention it before. I purposely tried to get expelled, so Charlie and Renee wouldn't have any choice, there's no way I could go back to the all girls school now. Huh.

You have no idea how much I had to go through until they finally expelled me. I started food fights, tried to smoke in front of a teacher and choked (never doing it again), disrupted a service, broke through the principal's office and changed the voice of the P.A system, so whenever the principal spoke, he sounded like one of those phone sex adds. But to no avail, I was still there.

When I finally did get expelled, the reason was totally ridiculous that I'm not even going to mention it, just to make a ridiculous statement about the ridiculousness of it all. A couple of days later, I was being picked up by Charlie in the airport, then wham! I'm at Forks, turning my back on my ridiculous past. Thinking back now, I was always such a loser. I didn't have any friends, not much people knew me, and the only friends I had turned their backs on me for a whole year, not to mention my parents weren't talking to me. Then suddenly I'm this chick who got expelled for some ridiculous reason. As much as I would have liked to stick around to find out how everybody reacted to my sudden departure, I was running out of time. During church service, I saw James looking at me with a murderous look on his face. James and Victoria Cross had become a couple over the year, I watched as Victoria wrapped her arms around James as she also looked at me with an expression filled with hatred.

I got up from the bench and started walking towards the small playground. I sat on one of the swings for a while, trying to clear my head, until I finally realized that it was getting dark. I walked back home to find Charlie's cruiser. I walked through the door and gave dad a peck on the cheek. He smiled up at me. I smiled back. A couple of weeks ago, there was no way I could have ever capture that same smile on my dad's face.

As I got upstairs, I saw that I had three text. I went through them and saw that one was from Alice.

**Fr. Alice**

Bella? Y rn't u pkn up ur fone?

**xo Alice **

I would call Alice later on, I thought as I went to the next message.

**Fr. Private Number**

We knw ur avoiding us Bella.

**Sean**

I frowned and deleted the message. And went to the last message. My breathe caught as I looked at the sender.

**Fr. Edward**

Hey Bella, r u okay? I've been wanting to talk to you.

But it seems your phone is always off, or it mysteriously

Hangs itself up. Talk to me kid.

**Love, Edward**

I wanted to cry. I didn't know why, but I really wanted to. It took long for me to figure out why I wanted to cry. I just wanted Edward to be with me. But it's worst, I knew I couldn't have him, after promising myself and all that stuff, besides aren't I going to the dance with Jake?

* * *

**Day 51**

I know I was suppose to be Sean and Sam's tour guide, but I've been avoiding them all morning. In a way I started to feel guilty, after all, I'm suppose to be their friend…sort of. I walked towards my locker to find Alice waiting for me anxiously. She gave me a hug and squeezed tightly. I tried to suck in her warmness, not noticing just how much I needed a hug.

"Are you okay? I saw how weirded out you were yesterday! Was it because of the new kids? They didn't do anything to you right?!" she asked frantically. I could just see the action packed thriller that was playing out inside Alice's head.

"Al! Relax! Nothing happened, I just got really tired, that's all" I said reassuringly, "Why would I be scared of the new kids?" I asked with a raised eyebrow. Alice seemed like she was relaxing little by little when I felt her stiffen, she was looking at someone behind me. I turned to find Jasper standing there, looking at the two of us.

I swear! I wish they would just get over it and get together already. This whole charades Jasper was playing with Alice was giving me a headache. Alice slowly slinked away, muttering that she'll see me at lunch time. I looked back at Jasper. "Hey Jazz, long time no speak, how have you been?" I asked coolly. He smiled at me and came closer. "Is Alice still mad over the whole incident in her house?" he asked uncomfortably. I looked at him, "Of course, even worst. Seeing you with another girl is like having pins and needles stabbing her" I said in a matter of fact tone.

I watched as Jasper flinched slightly, horrible as it may seem, I actually got satisfaction out of making him flinch. I looked behind Jasper and my heart started fluttering like crazy. Edward was heading our way, looking beautiful as usual. He stopped right next to Jasper and patted him on the back, then he looked at me and smiled his crooked smile. I turned into a pile of mush.

"Hey…" he said casually, his velvet voice left me feeling breathless. I nodded and smiled back. I waved a small wave and headed for my first class. So far I haven't been cornered by any of the twins, but I knew it was going to happen. I was on my way to English trying to ready myself when I felt someone walking right next to me. I slowly turned and found that it was Sam…or Sean.

He opened his mouth and grinned widely. Yep, it was Sean. "I'm in your English class" he said wisely. I smiled mockingly, "Really? Wow, I feel like I just won the lotto!" I said sarcastically. His grin turned to a giant frown, "Why are you being horrible?" he asked in a wounded voice. I looked and what I saw nearly broke my heart.

Sean was looking at me with puppy dog eyes like he was about to cry. His lips started to shiver, "Aw Sean, stop, don't cry, I'm sorry alright?" I said, utterly defeated. He sniffed some more then looked up, "we haven't caught up in ages, now your treating me like a piece of dog pile" he continued with the guilt trip. Being me, I fell for his stupid plan. "Aw come on, do you want me to make it up?" I said, I was edging towards desperation here, god I can't believe how weak I am.

"Yeah, I guess you can make it up" he started slowly. I looked at his electric blue eyes, "What is it?" I asked.

I shouldn't have asked, bad, bad Bella! "Well, I'll be happy again if you sit with us during lunch time…Just us" he started. I looked incredulously at him. How about Alice? I can't abandon Alice! I thought fiercely. I was about to refuse when Sean looked like he was about to keel over and start crying outside the English room. So I stupidly agreed.

Lunch was a disaster. I walked inside the cafeteria. I started walking towards Alice, hoping that the twins weren't there. But no such luck. Sean spotted me and called me over. I looked back at Alice, as her face fell. Argh! It was horrible! Horrible twins! I flopped myself down next to Sean. Sam looked absolutely board. Sam started flicking peas at me. "Quit it" I said dryly, he flicks another. "Quit it" I said slightly louder, he flicks even more, I grabbed my fork and yelled at him, "Quit it or else dweeb!" he flicks another at me. Sean grinned stupidly as he watched Sam and I bickering. "Wow, it's just like the old times!" He said happily, I gave him a sharp glare that made him shrunk.

"No! It can never be like the old times, we have a potential psycho James running after us, looking for us, plotting a way to destroy us. And you, lucky for me, might have lead him straight to me!" I snapped in a low hissing voice.

I heard the cafeteria door opened. My eyes clashed with Edward's as he eyed me, then the twins. A frown kept getting bigger and bigger as he saw Alice sitting with Jessica and Lauren.

I turned towards the twins once again. "Why did you follow me here anyway? Why didn't you just leave me alone?" I asked in a trembling voice. I looked up to find Sam and Sean looking at me. Then after a while Sam spoke up. "Because you're our friend" he said as if it was the most natural thing in the world. I snorted at that, "Right, is that why you told James that I was the culprit? Because I'm your friend? If I have friends like you guys, who needs enemies?" I said coldly before getting up. I heard Sean call out my name, but I walked out of the cafeteria. Ignoring the weird looks I was getting.

I walked towards the oval, and sat on the bleachers over looking the football field. I so desperately wanted to be left alone for once, but I felt someone flop themselves down right next to me. "Hey Bella, are you okay?" It was Edward. I looked at him, my cheeks felt damped. He ran a finger to remove the single tear that oozed out.

As I looked at his green eyes, I felt the sudden rush of trust. I found myself telling him things I've never told anyone. I found myself telling him all about James, and being a loser in my old school, and about the twins. He never said a word, he just put an arm around me, I felt like I wanted to drown in his sweet scent.

I looked at him, and suddenly got the sudden urge to kiss him. I looked away and tried to clean my mind. "I'm so sorry, you know about not wanting to be in a romantic relationship with you. I'm just not ready…" I said in a miniscule voice. I looked at him once again. "How about we try that being friends thing again?" I said, hope apparent in my voice. He gave me a sad smile. He didn't answer my question, so I didn't push it.

* * *

**Day 55**

The Winter Dance was just around the corner. Edward and I are friends again I guess. That's all, I swear. Despite the fact that I still get urges of jumping his bones, I tried to keep a low profile. The twins are still driving me insane. The day before my outburst, they had sent me a message. "Just so you know, it wasn't us who dubbed you in. We would never do that to you" that's all it said. Yet I still avoided them. What else do I say? I'm completely speechless.

Everything is so messed up. Renee had tried to cheer me up every night by telling me funny stories about Phil, her husband, but it would only amuse me for a couple of minutes, then I was back to my own little worried box. Alice was still depressed over Jasper, Romeo and Juliet will be opened in a couple of weeks time, I'm pretty sure I've only got 4 weeks left!

Please, please… Don't let this year end with me committing suicide or something stupid like that, because if that happened, that would really be tragic.


	15. Chapter 13

Disclaimer: I do not own twilight, Stephanie Meyer does :)

**Some of you asked why Bella got expelled, lol this is the ridiculous reason:** Despite the fact that she's been creating much bigger ruckus, the reason she got kicked off was she rudely interrupted Victoria Cross during her English speech about mythical creatures and astral planes, and Bella endlessly started asking stupid question. the next day, she was sent packing. the moral of the story? Victoria Cross is a bitch. Yup she got sent packing all because she didn't believe in leprechauns. whoop dee doo --

**Annual Forks High School Winter Dance  
Part 13**

* * *

**Day 60 (In the bathroom)**  
Who made up high school dances anyway? I mean it's just a stupid tradition, a very stupid tradition started by bored high school kids who wants to embarrass poor souls like myself…

But then again, if its so stupid, why am I staring at myself in front of the mirror, my gut feeling like its been torn away, looking like a big fluffy cloud…Oh god, I feel so bloated! Suck in, sniff, breathe…That's what Alice has been telling me to do for the past 30 minutes, and sadly for me, it's just not working. I am stressing out. We are waiting for the limo. Well Alice is downstairs right now, waiting for the limo, while I'm in the bathroom, writing on this diary like a grade A dweeb.

That's right, today is the day of the so called Winter Dance everybody's been looking forward to. Everybody, but me. Knowing my luck, I just know that something very bad is going to happen. Whether it be a balloon arch falling on my head (don't be too surprised, it can happen to anyone), or for some obscene reason, my dress rips apart, and I end up walking around with half of my dress off without me noticing, something is bound to happen. That's just me, bad things always happened, usually with me caught right in the middle.

Well, well, it's just a stupid tradition right? Breathe Bella, breathe…Oh god, I think I just heard tires hitting the gravel, that must be Jake and Trent…our dates. Help me!!

* * *

**Day 61**  
I will NEVER EVER go to another High School dance as long as I live. Last night was nothing but my very own nightmares brought to life. I mean, I knew something bad was going to happen, why didn't I listen to my instinct?

Jake came at around 7:00 PM. Alice had let them in, since I was doing a very good impersonation of someone about to throw up in the bathroom. I looked in the mirror, and took one gigantic breath. I hadn't gone downstairs earlier, I was too nervous, and I didn't feel that hot either. So I stayed inside the bathroom. Despite the fact that Alice kept calling out to me.

I hadn't known this earlier but apparently Edward was coming with us. So it was a surprise seeing him when I walked slowly down the steps. Jacob and Trent were already there waiting. As I walked down I looked at Edward. His eyes were fixed on me, like he was completely dazzled, which was absolutely ridiculous seeing as he dazzled me too.

I blushed deeply and gave him a small smile. He looked absolutely gorgeous, wearing a black suit, with a white shirt under. His outfit looked simple, but he was still beautiful. I looked at Jake and grinned. His big frame was pretty much taking up a lot of space. He wasn't looking at me, he was looking it Edward. Actually it was more like he was seething. They may have been arguing before I walked in. I cleared my throat, indicating that I was in the room. Jacob looked up and froze, his mouth hanging open. I twitched nervously, "It's that bad huh?" I asked nervously. Jacob started shaking his head, "No…Bella, you look beautiful" he said in a wobbly voice I never knew he was capable of. I grinned as he walked up to me and extended an arm. I took it, and we all piled out. I looked back and peeked at Edward only to have our eyes clash. I looked down nervously and walked through the door.

I gasped when I saw the stretch limo waiting outside. I mean, a stretch limo? Why didn't I reel Alice in when I could? Oh that's right, she asked me and I blindly said yes…

Jacob took my hand and led me inside the limo, giving the small of my back a little push. I looked back briefly, catching Jake's snide glance towards Edward. I tried to focus on something else as I sat down right next to the window. The whole vehicle was completely tinted, so you really couldn't see outside. As Edward jumped in, the door was shut. The limo suddenly became very dark. I heard fingers snapping, suddenly disco lights went on. I looked around absolutely confused. I looked at Edward, the pig was smirking.

Trent laughed out loud as he snaked an arm around Alice. "This is so ultra cool babe!" he said, his face inching closer toward Alice's face, Alice gave a nervous laugh. "Yeah I know…" she said, her voice low. I was still trying to figure out if she wanted me to save her or not when Luke's face closed in on hers, Alice gave me a pleading look then started fidgeting. I looked at Edward then at Alice. He nodded, "Hey Alice, is it alright if we stopped by at Rosalie's? Emmett and Rose are waiting for us" he said normally.

At the mention of Emmett, Trent let go of Alice's hand and cringed slightly. I tried my best not to smirk. It's old news, a lot of people were scared of Emmett. I don't know why though, Emmett is so nice…Well he can be a jerk sometimes, but he's like a brother to me now. But I could understand why anybody would be scared. Emmett's big…Actually, he's very big, a bit like a grizzly bear, but much nicer.

I felt warm arms wrap themselves around me. I looked up to find Jacob staring at me. "I'm so glad you asked me to be your date" he said softly, running a finger up and down my arm. I felt the goose bumps go up on the spot where Jake touched me. For some reason it made me feel very uncomfortable, as if he was taking over my personal space. I tried to create space between us as my uneasiness grew. I looked towards Edward who was staring at us with a closed up expression. He had a very blank expression on, an expression that scared me.

I tried to push Jake away gently so it didn't seem like I was pushing him away, but the limo suddenly stopped, sending me flying across the limo…straight on to Edward's arms. I looked up, utterly embarrassed. Strike one of the night.

Edward looked down at me with a crooked smile. I shivered. I heard a cough and I instantly sprung away from Edward. "We're at Rosalie's house" came Jacob's dry tone. I coughed loudly, trying to clear my throat, then gently pushed off Edward. I sat back next to Jake and smiled embarrassingly at him.

The limo door opened once again. Rosalie jumped in and instantly sat down next to Alice, while Emmett took one look at my uncomfortable state and headed towards me. He grinned at Jacob, then wedged us apart and sat right in the middle. "Sorry buddy, but I haven't seen Bella in ages!" he said, giving me an enormous bear hug.

I heard Alice giggling from across the limo. Jake let out an angry huff, "You go to the same school as her!" he said in an annoyed tone. Emmett shrugged then looked around the limo. "Hey, looks like everybody's here…Except for Jasper. Where is he?" he asked, looking innocently around the limo. Then his eyes zeroed in on Trent, "Sorry Al, I could have sworn that was Jasper, oh well. I thought you were going with him, what happened?" Emmett sure knew how to ruin somebody's night, since through out the whole way, all Alice could do was glower at him, and grumble to herself.

By that time, Trent had learnt not to get involved. He had given up trying to touch Alice too, since Emmett kept giving him death stares. When we finally got to the venue, everybody's happy mood was ruined, except for Emmett, he was enjoying riling everybody up. Through out the trip to the venue, Edward was completely spaced out, Trent looked like he was going to piss himself, Jake was grumbling, while I sat nervously, listening to Emmett's talk of what he thought was 'worst case scenarios in high school dances' which all included with me starting the whole terrible incident. For example, one was of me tripping over and wrecking the food banquet, then one chair falls, the whole decorations rips to pieces.

As he continued his torture I kept repeating the same two words over and over again, "Shut up!" then after two seconds, "Shut up!" Edward gave Emmett a dirty look, so he quiet for about 5 seconds, then he was at it again. All the while Jake was still grumbling unattractively.

I closed my eyes and tried to get away from all the mess, but I could feel somebody staring at me. I opened my eyes and my eyes clashed with Edward's green gaze. I came close to sighing, you know, the way those damsel in distress seemed to swoon after they saw their heroes, which freaked me out. I, Isabella Swan, am not the swooning time, yet it's what I wanted to do. I wanted to drown in those green pools and just swoon. I shook my head slightly and looked out the window, but only saw black. I forgot that the whole thing was tinted, even the interior. I looked up at the flashing disco light, I started to feel dizzy. When's this night ever going to end? I had thought to myself. I felt the limo slow down, then finally stopped. I looked at Alice, her face suddenly lit up, the look of excitement came back.

Alice bounced off the limo and ran around to open the door on my side. She practically yanked my arms of its sockets as she enthusiastically tugged on my arm. "Urgh how can you bounce off so easily?" I grumbled, as I tried to tug my arm back to avoid any injuries. I heard Jacob from behind me. "Hey Alice, what the hell, get your own date!" Jake barked. I spun around, slightly surprised. I took one look at Jacob's face. He looked like he just swallowed a tonne of bees, his face crumpling up in to a growl as he grabbed my left arm. I felt another hand on my right arm, I looked sideways to find Edward's equally angry face.

Jake let out a low growl, "Why don't you let go of my date leech?" he hissed menacingly before tugging on my left arm. Edward gripped my arm even tighter, tight enough that his grip wouldn't hurt me or slip. He glared coldly, "I think its her decision whether she wants me to let go, dog" he growled coldly, his velvet voice sounding sinister.

I felt like I was in the middle of a testosterone filled battle of fire and ice as Jake and Edward both started pulling at me like a rag doll. "I think its her decision whether she wants me to let go" Now that I think about what Edward had said, it just seems like it means so much more than it seemed.

Geesh, I really should wipe that out of my mind.

Jake and Edward were still tugging on me. I tried to break free, but they both had an iron grip on my wrists so I gave up. "Let go of me!" I yelled, instantly switching to my screaming mode. Jake and Edward both looked at me, but didn't let go. I heard footsteps coming through the entrance. I turned to look and found half of the number of the school population standing right there. I blushed even more and started my straggle to break free once again. It was turning in to a complete and utter nightmare with me smacked right in the middle of it.

"Oi!" Somebody called out from the crowd. I looked towards the voice and found Sam and Sean standing there, looking furious. Oh great…It's the village people, I thought sarcastically. "If you want a toy, go buy yourself a blow up doll retard!" Sam said coldly towards Jacob. I can't believe they actually did that, and right in the middle of the school yard where I knew people were casting judgmental glances my way. I got fed up.

I yanked my hand off and glared at both Edward and Jake. "You're both idiots, God stay away from me!" I yelled venomously. I pushed the two of them out of the way as I ascended up the stairs, pushing people out of my way. I heard call up to me, but I ignored it. I couldn't believe that all of that just happened. I was beyond embarrassed. I just wanted to go inside and lock myself up in one of the toilet cubicles.

I made a beeline towards the toilet and glared at the two freshmen's who both jumped when they saw me. They both hurriedly left as soon as they saw the mad look in my eyes. I put a hand on my head as I looked at my reflection. I pinched my cheeks, hoping to God that it was all a dream. A princess stared back at me, but I had no idea who she was. She sparkled under the light, her brown hair curled to perfection, the only downside was, tears were falling, cascading down her eyes slowly but surely. I blinked and wiped the tears away. I had no idea why I was crying but I couldn't help myself. I went inside one of the cubicles and took some tissues. The embarrassment was a little too much, and I really don't think I can look at Jacob the same again.

While Edward had handled things rather coolly, Jacob on the other hand looked like he was about to explode any second.

I tried to get rid of the mascara, there was no way I was ever getting out of the toilet, so I thought.

I heard the door open, five seconds later Alice was standing in front of me with a sympathetic look in her eyes. I saw that Angela was also behind her. "Sweetie…are you alright?" she whispered softly. I looked up delicately and shook my head. "Here have some water Bella" Angela offered me a bottle of water which I took. For a good fifteen minutes all I could do was rant, cry, then rant some more about how stupid boys can be.

All the while Angela and Alice just nodded sympathetically. Then five minutes later we heard a soft knock on the door, Alice didn't bother looking back. "Get lost! This toilet is out of order!" she barked, I giggled slightly despite my messed up condition. The door creaked open and Sam and Sean walked in. "Which part of 'out of order' don't you understand?" she said harshly, obviously ticked off. When she turned around and found Sean and Sam, she instantly got up and glared at them. "What? Did you get a sex change or something?" she said, cocking an eye brow.

"Hey bro, there's a pixie in front of us" came Sam's comment, "What do you reckon do we have to do to shut her up?" he said lowly. I could tell by the way he used his tone that he was trying to scare Alice, but you know, not so much. If Jacob was Iron Man, then Alice was Iron girl, or maybe Steel Girl. She stared coldly at the twins, "What do you want from her? I mean lets forget the fact that that call about the blow up doll wasn't lam-e at all, what do you want?" she asked coldly. Both Sam and Sean stared at her then at me, "Bella, who the hell is this?" Sean asked, I rolled my eyes, "This is Alice, and that over there is Angela, their my best friends. What is it to you anyways?" I added stonily.

Sean's expression softened as he approached me. "I-" he started, but Sam cut him off with a cough "by I, he means we" he said, "Yes, well we came to check up on you. What was that all about?" Sean asked worriedly. I let out a heavy sigh. "Don't worry about it you two, it's got nothing to do with you. Just a mess a created" I sniffed then shrugged. There was silence for a while. A silence that was filled with Sean and Sam darting each other worried looks that was all too familiar to me.

I knew something was wrong. Forty five minutes in to the winter dance and I knew something was very wrong. I slowly got up and stood in front of them, completely forgetting about Alice and Angela. "Something's wrong isn't it? I can feel it" I said in a low slightly panicked voice.

The twins looked at me, consternation filling up their expressions. "What?" I asked, looking from one to the other, "What is it?" I said again. Sean and Sam gave each other worried looks then they both stared at me.

"They've found us…" Sean started, but I cut him off. As soon as he said that I bolted out of the bathroom. The door swung open and I ran right in to Edward, his face filled with worry. "Bella! I-" but I ignored him, I continued walking through the narrow passage and went inside the badly decorated hall.

I looked up in the stage, the DJ was standing right next to a very pretty red head, she brushed her lips against his ears and handed him a piece of paper. The DJ looked down and looked up, his mouth etching in to an amused smile. "Alright y'all, I've got a message here for an Isabella Swan!" As soon as my name was said, everybody stopped moving and looked towards the DJ.

The DJ cleared his throat and started reading out what was on the paper. '"We know you're here, don't even try running away, or were going to crush and destroy you!" wow what a charming message, the message was courtesy of Victoria Cross and James Malone!" he laughed in a laid back voice booming voice similar to Emmett's, so laid back that I could pretty much see my whole life rip at the seams.

I looked back at Sean and Sam, their beautiful faces masked with worry. I turned around and found Edward staring at me. He came to me and lifted my chin, I was trembling. James had found me, he's in Forks! I stared at Edward, my voice caught. "Shh Bella…I'm not going to let anything happen to you, do you understand?" and just with those words, he took my hand and dragged me to where Emmett was standing with Rosalie and Jasper. I looked around and found that Alice was just right behind us, with a confused look on her face.

"Emmett, call a cab, Alice, call Charlie, tell him Bella is staying over for the night" and just like that Emmett walked off, clutching his phone, while Alice walked the same direction. I saw Jasper run after her.

"You two, you're coming with us" Edward said, giving a side way glance towards the twins. The twins didn't bother objecting. We all started heading outside, as we stepped outside we bumped in to Jacob. He started walking towards me, his face and his expression back to normal. He looked guilt ridden and damn it, he should be. "Oh look! it's the egoistic dog" said both the twins in unison. Jake glowered at them both. "What? You got sidekicks now Cullen?" he said slyly. Edward ignored him and looked away. "What do you want Jake?" I asked coldly. He looked at me then, the pig even had the decency to look ashamed.

"I'm so sorry Bells, I didn't mean for things to turn out like this" he said dejectedly. I looked at him then and almost moaned, he just looked so apologetic that I actually went up to him and gave him a big hug. But the weird thing was, I didn't even feel any frisson, sure I felt warmth, but it was the brotherly type. I looked up and grinned goofily at Jake, that's when I heard someone's mock clapping. I looked down the stairs and saw the face that I've been dreading to see.

James stood there wearing a black suit, his hair had grown long enough that he could actually tie it up in a ponytail. Right next to him was Victoria, looking beautiful as ever. She was staring at me with a very unattractive smirk. I shivered, I felt a hand intertwining themselves with mine, when I looked up, Edward was right next to me, staring at the newcomers icily.

I felt a crowd gathering up behind me. I could hear whispers as we all descended down the stairs. Edward wrapped an arm around me, while Jake looked uncomfortable on the right hand side.

"Oh, lookie here, looks like you've found yourself a little posse, how _quaint_" Victoria said sassily, her eyes focused solely on me. Then her gaze lingered towards Alice and she smirked. "You even have Santa's little helper with you" she said brightly, her whole exterior looking a little too feline for my liking. She was literally _purring_.

I heard James let out a low snort, which Victoria took as encouragement. "Huh, I bet that hair colour isn't even natural" she said loudly, standing in front of Alice, completely towering over her.

I looked on, completely horrified. Alice looked down, and for a few seconds, I couldn't see her face at all, but when she looked up, I saw a completely different Alice. Her eyes were filled with malice, her lips forming in to a cruel smile. "You really shouldn't have said that" then suddenly she jumped, and just like that she was on top of Victoria. Pulling Victoria's hair, and slapping her. She was going too fast that Victoria didn't have any time to defend herself. I stood there completely aghast with my mouth hanging open. It took a couple of moments for people to pull them apart. I saw Jasper put an arm around Alice, while James grabbed Victoria by the arm not so gently. Alice tried to spring back, but Jasper had a solid grip on her waist.

He bent down and whispered something in her ears which made her blush, she looked up at Jasper, then instantly fell quiet. She was breathing pretty heavily as she stared at Victoria with a mad expression.

James suddenly looked up to find that he was surrounded by people who weren't too happy to be in the same room, or even the same building as him. He smiled charmingly and slowly backed off. Victoria it seemed also caught on, she looked around then she glared at me, as if it was my fault that all these people wanted to yank her head off.

I shook my head as I tightened my grip on Edward's arms. "Why don't you just leave, go back to your stupid astral plane" Edward hissed at Victoria. Victoria looked at him with a bewildered expression, as if she couldn't believe a hot guy just scolded her. I shook my head once again, maybe I shouldn't have told Edward the reason why I got expelled.

James turned to go, but before he disappeared in his black Mercedes Benz he slowly turned and looked me dead on the face. He smiled devilishly and I shivered, "I am so 'gunna destroy you…" he said in a smooth voice before hopping inside the car and driving off at a fast speed. Two seconds later I let out a dry sob. "I'm fucked aren't I? I mean this only ever happens to me!" I wailed, but not loud enough that the people up the stairs could hear me.

Two cabs stopped in front of the school. "Come on, lets get you home" Edward said softly. Before I jumped in I turned towards Sean and Sam. "Can you guys please go with Emmett and Rose? Explain everything to them" I said in an exhausted voice. I got inside the cab and sat right next to Edward. I looked out the window and gave Jake a faint smile. He nodded then turned away.

Jasper opened the door once again, guiding Alice inside the cab. I turned to look, somebody had grabbed his arm. She was blonde and pissed. I heard a commotion, the girl was yelling, I couldn't make out what they were saying, but I saw Jasper turn away and jump on the passenger seat at the front of the cab. I looked from Jasper to Alice, trying to figure out what the hell was happening.

I stared at the seat in front of me, hoping to god that I would wake up from this nightmare, but God wasn't listening to me. I felt Edward wrap his arms around me, and I leaned my head against his chest.

I cried silently all the home, keeping my face pressed against Edward's chest, not wanting to ever surface. Wrapped around him, I felt like he was protecting me from the world, like I was something precious or something.

I'm nothing special, I know that for sure. Last night, I was the perfect image of a train wreck. My curls had come undone, my mascara was running down my face due to all the tears spillage, and worst of all I was panic-stricken. The peace that I've worked hard to build up had suddenly been disturbed. I can see nothing good coming out of this.

When we got to the Cullen's house, Edward held my hand and led me towards one of the guest rooms. He let me have my break, but after thirty minutes, I heard him sneak back inside my room. I got up and rubbed my eyes, waiting for my sight to adjust to the darkness. He was standing over my bed, so I signaled for him to sit right next to me, and he did. "Thank you so much for being there tonight" I said in a tinny voice. I curled up to him. It doesn't matter that he's not my boyfriend, knowing that he's always there for me warmed my heart.

He wrapped an arm around me. "Shhh, hell would freeze over before I let that idiot James get his paws all over you" he said gently. I closed my eyes and snuggled up to Edward. "Go to sleep love, I'll stay with you if you want me to" he whispered softly. I nodded briefly before nodding off to dreamland.

Last night was the worst night in the history of all bad related nights. Nothing could ever top that. Another problem added into the dog pile of shit that I have to put up with. I still have the Romeo and Juliet play to do, which by the way is like a tonne of brick being chucked on top of my head, then on top of that, I now have a psychotic jock wanting a piece of my ass…and not in a good way either.

a/n

**Hey guys!! I am so sorry for the late update! Argh argh argh, I have my midterms right now, and I had to rush to finish up two folios, and I'm still not done with one of them!! :( It is sooo bad, but I really hope you guys like this and review on this. It makes me stress less when I open up my email and find that I have a tonne of review from awesome people (ie; my readers!). So please review!! My goal for this story is to actually reach 200. But I don't know if I'm capable of that :(**

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	16. Chapter 14

Hello lovelies, heres another update. Ahhh so fast!! lol. Thanks so much for all the reviews! It brightened my day! And thanks for those who bid me good luck with my midterms!! Thanks sooo much! Well you know the drill. Please REVIEW AFTER.

AND OH YEAH I DONT OWN TWILIGHT. STEPHENIE MEYER DOES :)

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_**The morning after**_

_**Part 14**_

_**Day 62 (In the library)**_

When I came back from Alice's place yesterday I took one look at Charlie and Renee's face and knew that something was wrong. I found the two of them sitting around the kitchen table talking to each other in hush tones. When I walked in they quickly sprung apart.

I looked suspiciously from one to the other, the silence growing awkward by the second. "So are you guys going to tell me what's wrong or are you going to leave me hanging?" I asked slowly.

I saw the quick brief glance Charlie gave Renee before he smiled. "Silly Bella, nothing is wrong. Go and rest, I know your tired" and that was all he said. I stood there for a minute contemplating my next move when mum spoke.

"Please Bella? Just go to your room" she said gently. For once Renee looked exhausted. She had dark rims under her eyes as if she hadn't been sleeping. I gave them both a worried glance and went straight to bed.

I fell asleep thinking about it, actually, I'm still thinking about it now. Whatever it is, I need to get it out of my mind. I have play rehearsal in 15 minutes. Besides…I don't know, maybe it's nothing, and I'm just being very paranoid.

Things hasn't been that great since the dance. I've been very jumpy lately. The last thing James said to me two nights ago was so loaded with threats. The very thought of it made me shiver.

When I woke up the morning after, everybody was still sound asleep. Edward had fallen asleep next to me. I had stared at him until the sun was actually up outside. He was sleeping so serenely, his breathing was light.

All I could think about was cuddling up to him. The very thought made me shiver and I decided to get up and roam around the house.

I lightly closed the door and tip toed down the stairs. I was concentrating on not making a sound that I sort of slipped. I was falling head first, the wind rushing really quickly. But I never felt the blow. I looked up and found Jasper staring down at me, his face crumpled in to a frown.

"Uh..Hey…awkward much?" I said, laughing nervously. "Why are you up so early?" he asked in a deep voice.

I shrugged and smiled, "meh…um Jasper?" I started, but then looked down.

He looked at me searchingly. "What is it?" he asked.

"You can put me down now" I said awkwardly.

He blushed deeply and set me down. Then picking a completely bad timing, my stomach grumbled really loudly. I turned a deep crimson as I stared at my stomach irritatedly. Jasper started laughing while I kept turning redder.

"I think it's breakfast time" Jasper nodded matter of factly. I giggled slightly and we both started heading towards the kitchen.

As we sat down on the stool I looked at Jasper's face. he was staring blankly outside the window.

"Umm Jasper?" I said hesitatingly. I knew it wasn't perfect timing, but I knew that this was the only time that I would probably catch him alone.

"What is it?" he asked, mystified.

I started stalling for a little bit but I ended up blurting it out.

"Umm, well, I'm really sorry…For you know…Going all psycho before, and for all those stuff that I said" I squeaked. It was true. Come to think of it, I was so overprotective of Alice that I kind of attacked Jasper.

Thinking about it now makes me flinch.

He laughed gently. "Hey, I'm over it, you were only protecting Alice, I understand" he said softly. Then he looked out the window.

"How is she these days anyway?" his voice seemed to hesitate as he continued to look at anything but me.

"Alice…she's strong. I mean she's not the same before. You did hurt her you know. But she's coping" I started. I looked at Jasper and gave him a sad smile. "She pretends to be happy all the time, but I can see that she's still hurting. She saw you and your girlfriend last week you know?" I continued tersely. I looked at the pain that crossed Jasper's face and knew that he still had feelings for Alice.

"I keep trying to talk to her, but she wont even look at me. All I want to do is to make everything right, but I keep fucking everything up!" he said chokingly. Jasper buried his face on his hands and fell silent.

My stomach chose that moment to complain once again and I flinched. He didn't seem to hear it.

I looked at him worriedly and closed my eyes. When I opened them I placed a hand on his back and tried to console him. "Jas, if you really want to make things right with Alice then maybe you should set her straight. It's obviously that you like her, and she obviously likes you" I said rationally, then he looked up and stared at me, "Stop playing mind games with her. You're only hurting her even more" I said bluntly.

It was true, I've seen Alice cry several times, and all because of Jasper. It hurts seeing her all broken up. Jasper was still staring at me with wonder in his eyes.

Then he started chuckling. "What's so funny?" I asked, puzzled. He was shaking his head, then he looked back at me. "Nothing kid, it's just that its weird you know. You've changed so much. You use to blush a lot. I mean, I'm not saying you don't blush anymore, but you seem so much more opinionated" he said casually. I stared blankly at him. Really? was the last thing I thought about before we heard the kitchen door opened.

Edward stood in front of us, looking confused. "What are you doing here?" he asked me. He obviously forgot that I slept over the night before. I instantly jumped to the conclusion that he also forgot sleeping right next to me.

Hurt flooded through me as I jumped off my stool and brushed past him. He grabbed my arm and gently turned me to face him. "Uh I have to go gather all of my things. I'm going home" I said casually. Giving him a bright smile which brought way too much pain.

"Oh, okay. I'll give you a lift then?" he offered. I smiled again and nodded. I rushed back to the spare room and took a deep breath. I felt like crying, but I pushed it down. I had no reason to cry, none at all.

Edward dropped me off. He pulled over right next to my dad's cruiser, we were both quiet, the silence was deafening. Edward cleared his throat and I looked expectedly towards him.

He was staring at me so intently that I couldn't look away. He held my face with one hand, then my stomach rudely interrupted once again. He chuckled gently then leaned in and gave me a kiss. Just half an inch from my mouth. "Take care alright? Eat some food, I'll see you on Monday" he said gently, his velvet voice leaving tremors of electricity bouncing up and down my stomach.

I don't know how I feel. I love Edward, but I'm scared. I'm scared to be with him, but I know I'll be lying to myself if I said theres no bone in my body that didn't wanted to jump him. I'm not afraid of sitting next to him, holding hands, and going out. I'm afraid of what's going to happen when the wrecking of my heart starts up again.I'm afraid that all the memories will be bottled up...But I wont see any future between the two of us.

**Day 62 (At home now)**

Forget about rehearsal. Things have taken a turn for the worst. Nothing much happened in rehearsal so I'm not even going to talk about it.

After school Sean and Sam were waiting for me in the car park. I looked at both of them through slit eyes. I'm not one for playing the blaming game, but everything that happened in the dance was entirely their fault.

I walked past the two of them and ignored them both. "Bella, please were really sorry. We know that we pretty much screwed everything up by coming here in the first place. But you have to understand that we couldn't just let you walk away" Sean pleaded, his blue eyes going round.

I stared at him with a deadpanned look. It was those eyes again. He was staring at me with those stupid puppy dog eyes. I am so weak!

I sighed and looked at him then at Sam. I felt my eyes watering up and I'm afraid that I wasn't able to hold it. I felt the tears stinging my eyes and I hastily brushed them away.

"What do I do now? I mean, I worked so hard to build up this little peace, now you guys pretty much just came in and crashed my little party. Tell me what to do, because I don't know how to help myself!" I said harshly.

Sean came closer and bear hugged me, a couple of moments later I felt another arm as Sam joined in. After a while I could hear whispers coming from behind. I turned around and found that we were blocking some student's path. The three of us moved away and started heading towards The twins black convertible.

I could feel random peoples gaze on me, but I ignored them. I sniffed some more and Sean gave me another squeeze. "Don't worry, we'll work something out. We wont let anything happen" Sean had said. I had agreed and for once I actually felt hope.

But my hope were dashed when I got home. I walked inside the house to find Charlie crying. Renee was trying hard to console him but he wouldn't budge. He had his face buried in his palms as he continuously sobbed.

I stared at Charlie, absolutely horrified, then at Renee. "Mum…" I muttered, my voice felt hoarse. Renee looked up her face had been contorted in to an unhappy scowl. "What's happening?" I asked nervously.

Renee looked up to the ceiling and almost rammed her fist through the table, her anger was obviously bubbling up in the surface.

"The police department is under new management now, they've decided to let your dad go for some bull reason about him being old!" she said angrily. I stared openmouthed at mum.

Who in their right mind would let Charlie go? He wasn't even that old (a/n sorry guys, I don't know how old Charlie is suppose to be). I sat down next to Renee and held Charlie's hand. Then something dawned on me.

"Mum…Who's head of the department now?" I asked slowly. Somehow I felt like I didn't really want to know, but I still had to ask.

"I don't know Bells, something like Maloney or something-" I cut her off halfway, "Sgt. James Michael Malone sr.?" I asked abruptly. Renee looked at me with a mystified look in her eyes. "Yeah that's him, how do you know?" she asked incredulously. But I didn't answer.

Instead I rushed out of the house and ran to my red Chevy truck and started heading towards the twin's house. They gave me the address before I left school, just in case I needed to see them.

Damn it! What the hell! Wasn't it enough that he was hunting me down, but did he really have to involve my dad as well?

I speed towards the Striker Manor and was blown away when I saw the mansion. I knew the twins were reach, but the house was two story and about the same size as the Cullen's monster of a house.

The mansion was made out of white marble with one gigantic white metal fence that towered over me. I flinched slightly, I felt like I was standing outside the ice queen's mental palace. I felt breathless and not in a good way either. I momentarily forgot the issue at hand and my mind started doing mental calculations of the cost.

I shook my self and thought, _is this really necessary? There's only two of them! _I shook my head then jumped when I heard a cackling sound. "Miss, please remove your car from the drive way" a voice said, and I jumped again.

I looked around my surrounding and found the intercom. It was disguised as a _rock. _I moved closer to it and tried to push a button that said 'speak' but the intercom buzzed again, "Miss, remove your hands from the button, I repeat, remove your hand from the button!" I stared at the intercom as if it just offended me.

Then there was silence. After a minute or so I heard laughter coming from the other side of the line. I came close to hitting myself when I realized that I've been had! And badly too!

I heard a click and the gates suddenly swung open. I thundered my way inside the estate and started walking furiously towards the twins who were both standing out front, laughing hysterically.

I stood in front of them for what seemed like forever, just waiting for them to shut up. I stared crossly at the two of them, keeping the silence until as usual, I cracked. "Shut up!" I yelled, and in the process, I ended up stamping my feet.

"Oh my God! She just stamped her feet" Sam said hysterically

"I thought girls only did that in the movies!" Sean added.

Then they both looked at me and the they both fell quiet. I was on the verge of tears when they finally caught on that something was wrong.

I explained what was wrong, and they both stared at each other darkly. "I knew he was mad, but this is just low" Sean said menacingly, "Yeah, what the hell, he's using his family's power to bring you down? Why can't he fight his own battles for once?" Sam said maddeningly.

It turned out that James Malone's family were very powerful indeed. They owned all kinds of companies up and down the East and the West Coast, and last time I heard, his father was going for Governor in the City of Salt Lake District.

I'm not surprised. The old school that I went to were filled with rich kids who were the future successors of their families. Even the twins had a very powerful family, his mum owns a fashion label that was taking this generation by storm, but their family wasn't as strong or as old as The Malone's. The Striker's were considered as 'new money'.

Going to West Brighton Academy for girls had been such a pain in the ass, mostly because of all the stuck up kids that went there. So I wasn't entirely surprised that West Brighton Academy for boys was exactly the same.

"I know! We'll get our family to help you!" Came Sean's offer, I snorted at that, "What? What are your parents going to do? Chuck clothes at James and brand him as an official fashion train wreck?" I said sarcastically. The twins were quiet. I looked at them both, and they were both smirking.

"Even during these situation, you're still as sharp tongued as ever. Were glad you didn't change" Sam patted my back and I let out a huge growl. "This is so unfair…" I couldn't think of anything else to say.

"It wasn't even me who dubbed you in…" I said dejectedly. The twins looked down and started fidgeting.

"I don't get why you even joined his gang" I said, mostly talking to myself.

"We had no choice, our parents wanted us to be friendly with him, since our family needed them as an alliance. But they never knew the kind of twisted stuff James made us do. Because of it we couldn't even talk to you or anything. Now you're caught in the middle…Sorry" Sean said weakly.

Sean looked so dejected and guilt ridden, my heart nearly melted. No matter how much I hated them at one point, I can't help it. Having them as friends in boarding school was what kept me sane. They were practically my very own brothers.

I felt my pocket vibrate and I looked at the number. The caller id said 'Edward' I looked at it for a while and was about to hang it up when Sam snatched it from me and picked it up. "Hello, sorry who ever you are, Bella is just having a daydream. Leave your name and your number and she'll get back to you soon" he said in an operator voice, the whole time I was watching him incredulously.

I smacked his head and grabbed my phone away from him. "You're an idiot!" I yelled. I put the phone on my ear and took a deep breath.

"Hey Edward, sorry about that, that was Sam being a loser" I said weakly. I heard a chuckle on the other line. "It's fine, is something wrong?" he asked. It's as if he has telepathy or something. I shook my head despite the fact that he can't see me.

"No…nothings wrong" I said softly. What was the use of telling Edward. I don't want to mix them up with my problem.

"So…What's up?" I said in a tiny voice.

"Oh, well, um the guys wanted to ask whether you want to come and play baseball with us. You don't have to play, you can watch if you want. Carlisle and Esme will be there too. You can ask Sam and Sean to come if you want" he said hesitatingly. The boys had only been in Forks for a couple of days, so all Edward's seen them do was make me cry and jumpy. Not a very good impression.

Despite everything, I actually want Sam and Sean to fit right in. I don't know why but those two are my best friends too. They're in my world. When I was alone and lonely they were there to welcome me in their world.

"We'd like to come, when is it?" I asked casually. I heart clicking from the other side and Edward spoke. "Tomorrow night, at 7. But were meeting over at my place, were all going to our special baseball spot" he said excitedly. "I really wanted to take you there, but I've had no time these days, so I'll see you tomorrow then?" he asked. I closed my eyes and sighed. "Yeah, I guess so. But I'll have you know, I suck at sports" I said , he chuckled then the line went dead.

I looked from Sean to Sam. "Why did you tell him we were coming? We never agreed on going. And what about this whole thing with James?" Sean said crossly. I stared at him skeptically.

"I need to get my mind off of him, or else I'm going to end up committing a homicide!" I barked. The twins both looked at each other. "Besides, a game of baseball might do you both some good"

So I'm sitting at home now. Not really looking forward to tomorrow night. I'm a joke when it comes to sport, the only positive thing about tomorrow would be seeing Edward. Hey, I know that I can't touch him or anything, doesn't mean I'm not going to take advantage of any opportunity of ogling him.

I just received a message from an anonymous sender.

Fr: no number

**I hope you liked my little surprise. I'm going to destroy you. **

God, who could it be from?! Note: Sarcasm intended.

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Sorry guys, I know this was a crap chapter. Well at least I think it is, this is just a filler chapter to get you guys ready for what's about to happen. In here you got to find out more about James and his family, then more about the twins. JxA is about to get together lol. I was wondering whether I actually should have put it in this chapter. But I thought I might as well save it for later! This series is almost finish!! Oh no! Please review!! You know how much reviews cheer me up!! :0)


	17. Chapter 15

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**Disclaimer: **Twilight and its character are owned by Stephenie Meyer...The Striker twins however are mine...mine...MINEEEE!! muwahhhaahahahaa (evil laugh) Ps: apology note at the very end :) (Equivalent of 'The game' chapter) ENJOY!! R&R you know the drill

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**The Game**

**Part 15**

_**Day 64 (Bedroom)**_

_Tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick. _

The alarm clock is starting to annoy me. I haven't had any sleep what so ever, and the baseball game is only in a couple of hours.

_Tick, tick, tick, tick. _The sound is really starting to imprint itself inside my head so that it feels like I'm hearing ticking in my ears permanently.

I looked at the clock, It was already five in the afternoon. Edward had told me to be over at their place by six tonight.

I had finished school early so I decided I had wanted to take a nap. But damn it! I can't, my sick mind kept thinking up ways of how everything could go wrong. I mean, what if James showed up?

I wouldn't put it pass him, after all, he had stuck his nose in my personal life, who's to say he wont wreck the only social life I have?

I gave up on trying to fall asleep and turned to do my homework, until I realized I didn't have any. I found myself feeling helpless and useless. I went downstairs to find Renee and Charlie having coffee and talking in hush tones.

They both looked up when they heard me enter the kitchen, smiles pasted on their face. It looked strained, the smile I mean. It looked so put on, as if in doing so, they were secretly inflicting pain on their faces.

I sighed and walked towards Charlie. I wrapped my arms around him. I felt like saying "It's okay, everything will be alright" but then I would be lying. I can't predict the future, I have no way of knowing what kind of shit James would throw at me next.

After drinking a glass of water, I slowly headed back up the stairs and closed the door of my bedroom. I sighed and opened up my closet. I might as well get changed. What do you wear at a baseball match anyway?

Just as I was to select an outfit, I heard my ring tone, then the buzzing coming from my bed. I picked up my phone, 'Hello?" I said in a low voice.

"Hey Bella, it's Alice!"

"Oh, hey Alice, what's up?"

"It's going to rain tonight!" she said in a shrill voice.

Yes! I had thought triumphantly, but my hopes got dashed when somebody else spoke on the phone.

"We're just calling to tell you to wear some warm clothes" Edward said casually.

"Oh, yeah, and if you tried to skip out on us, I made sure with the twins that they came to pick you up" he said even more casually. So casual that it started to piss me off.

I abruptly hanged up on him. Annoying as he was, I couldn't help it. I felt a shiver running up and down my spine at the sound of his velvet voice. I smiled to myself, but then instantly stopped as soon as I realized I was starting to look lame.

I composed myself and selected a thick wooly jacket , a blue long sleeve turtleneck, and baggy jeans. I changed my clothes and looked at the clock once again. One hour left to go. That's when I lied down on my bed. The _tick, tick, ticking_ of the clock is still driving me insane.

I looked up at the ceiling and closed my eyes. Edward doesn't know anything about Charlie being sacked…And personally, I would love it if things stayed that way. I don't want anyone to feel sorry for me, pity is the last thing I want, especially from Edward.

I am now patiently waiting for my ride, hoping to God that the twins doesn't bring some ridiculous car that would embarrass me to oblivion.

Uh-oh, I think I just heard screeching tires hitting gravel. Looks like my ride has come.

**Day 64 (Bedroom…10 minutes to midnight)**

Wow, I mean wow. I am speechless. Lets have five minutes of silence while I wallow in my own misery. He knows, Edward knows, and I don't know what to make of it.

When I opened the door, I was expecting to find a sleek car. You know, the type that has a leather interior and all that stuff, but instead I kind of froze when I saw a two seater hot rod.

I'm not kidding, it was seriously a hot rod. All my hopes of getting across town without being embarrassed just got crushed. It was so tiny, fit for only two people. TWO PEOPLE!

I stared at Sam who was sitting on the driver's seat. "ARE YOU CRAZY?!" I exclaimed incredulously. I looked at the hot rod's exterior and nearly screamed in frustration. I'm pretty sure I saw my embarrassment bar fly off the meter!

I circled the little car and looked at Sean. "It's fit for two people, there is no way we can fit!" I yelled out, and there was no way I was ever going to be seen riding that thing.

Sean jumped off and draped an arm on my shoulder. "Will you relax?" he said soothingly, "Stop squawking, you sound like a chook" he said matter of factly. I glared at him irritatingly.

"I do not squawk!" I yelled out.

Sam started laughing, and I threw him a dirty look. I felt Sean patting my shoulders. "Yes you do, you sound like a chicken when you start ranting" he said, sending me sympathetic looks.

I gave him a dirty look and brushed past him. I jumped on the vacant seat and stared out in to space. Sam started up the car and was starting to pull away from the drive way. "What the hell! How about me?!" he yelled out, I gave him another dirty look.

Sam looked at him, "You can walk" he said coolly, undoubtedly enjoying himself. I reached for my car keys and chucked it, aiming for Sean's head. It hit him and the keys hit the floor with a loud _clunk! _

"What? You don't honestly want me to drive this piece of tin?!" he said in an absolutely terrified voice. I let out a big sigh.

I looked at him, giving him a firm look. "There are worst things in the world you know" I said rationally.

He looked at me with a doubtful expression. "Oh yeah? Like what?" he said in a trembly voice.

"Well, an alien could abduct you, maybe a convicted criminal could kill you, or maybe myths could come true right now and a vampire will swoop in and suck yer vladdd" I said, putting on a Transylvanian accent, then added "Or my personal favourite; you could end up walking" I said casually, shrugging my shoulders.

Sean gave me an 'are you kidding?!' look before he disappeared inside my red Chevy. I chuckled mildly. _Right, nothing worst than walking. _I thought skeptically.

"Shall we go?" Sam asked in a cool voice. Something about the way he said that made me think we were about to shoot out of this hemisphere or something. I never saw it coming. He suddenly accelerated, shooting out, it felt like my whole stomach got left in the process. The wind swept my hair all over the place, giving the best impersonation of medusa.

I let out a shriek, holding on to the sides. "Sam!! You friggin maniac!! Arghh!!" I screamed out. I heard him laughing over the roaring in my ears. "Bella if I were you, I'd close my mouth! A fly might fly innn!" he yelled out over the roaring wind.

I closed my eyes, absolutely terrified. How the hell did he get the car so bloody fast anyway? I'm sure that it's a very old model. It was made out of a thin scrap of metal, painted over with black paint, striped with the American flag colours.

It seemed like Sam read my mind, he turned to me and grinned. "I had it especially made…" then Sam started talking about the mechanism of the car. "I love speed you know that?!" he said enthusiastically. He was grinning so widely, his smile was infectious.

I gave him a sideways glance as he savored the feeling of speed. Sam reminded me of someone who once drove me to school during one rainy morning…

My mind started drifting off towards Edward once again. I was going insane, I know its only been what? A week since I decided to be Edward free, I was having major Edward withdrawal syndrome. Symptoms: hallucinations, unexpected daydreaming and the craving for a certain messy bronzed haired, pouty, green eyed individual.

That whole ordeal after that dreadful sleepover at Alice's place seemed like a lifetime ago. That must have been a week after I moved to Forks.

I suddenly felt a tap on my head. I dazedly looked at the blonde boy right next to me. "Yes?" I said, my eyes slightly unfocused.

"You're day dreaming again" Sam said in a low voice which I could barely hear.

"What do you mean?" I asked confused. Sam ignored me.

"You seem to be drifting off lately, is something bothering you? Other than James of course" he asked, absolutely puzzled. He had slowed down a bit, and now he was completely ignoring the road.

"Sam, you idiot! Keep your eyes on the road!" I squeaked. I nervously clutched the sides of the hot rod.

"Well?" he asked.

"Well what?" I knew exactly what he was talking about, but I decided to play dumb. I heard him sighing before he sped up even more! I let out a scream. We were winding around a heavily forested area now which I instantly recognized.

A couple of moments later, I saw the familiar house of the Cullen's. The tires screeched and came to a halting stop. I hastily got out of the hot rod and tried to stand straight. I felt so dizzy, that the place felt like it was spinning around.

I was having a bad case of motion sickness. I sat on the ground and put my face between my legs. I could hear laughter from behind me as another car pulled up. I watched Sean climbed down the truck and started laughing along with his brother. They gave each other high fives and just watched me breathing uncontrollably.

I looked up in the sky, and I couldn't help it. I knew I should have been angry but I felt laughter bubbling up in the surface. The next moment I found myself laughing along with them.

Sam lifted me off my feet and dragged me up. "I hate you guys!" I said good naturedly. I whacked Sean on the back and he tried to get away. So instead I tried to whack Sam, but he got away as well.

The three of us got a little carried away that we didn't notice that we had an audience. I had Sam in a headlock while Sean was trying to pull me away when we noticed the Cullen's standing there, _All of the Cullen's. _

Emmet was smirking, no doubt wanting to join in on the fun, Alice looked surprised, while Edward had an unfathomable look on his face.

I blushed deeply and I straightened myself out. I awkward walked towards Alice who was now giggling slightly. She wrapped an arm around me and we both went inside the house. I brushed past Edward and once we were leveled, our eyes met and held for around five seconds before Alice dragged me inside.

"Are you alright Bella?" I heard someone say behind me. I turned around and found Esme smiling at me kindly. I gave her a bright smile and nodded.

"I'm good" I said, awkwardly dodging her piercing green eyes. I blushed and bowed my head. Alice and I left the boys outside and I could hear Emmett asking the twins if they wanted to play a game of hand wrestling.

Everybody else followed shortly. I saw that Jasper and Rosalie were both there. I could feel tension in the air as Jasper gave me a smile, then his eyes lingered towards Alice, who was uncharacteristically blushing.

I hid a secret smile and followed the delicious smell that was floating in the air. I started heading inside the kitchen but abruptly stopped when I saw the dining table. My mouth dropped open as I saw all the food in the table.

I felt someone behind me, I quickly turned around. I didn't realize how close Edward was standing next to me. As I was turning, my nose came close to bumping in to his. I backed up a little bit as I stared at him hopelessly.

Right at that moment, all reasons of why I shouldn't be with Edward flew out the window as we both stood there staring, just looking at each other and sharing breathing space.

I couldn't think straight, and he was standing so close, his scent was creating havoc with my senses. Next thing you know I stopped breathing and…I fainted.

I felt Edward's arms drape themselves around me as I tried to make sense of what the hell just happened. "Bella? Bella?!" Edward was tapping my head gently, trying to keep me up.

"You made me faint!" I said accusingly. Edward shook his head and helped me stand straight.

I felt Edward press his lips against my ears. "Why fight something you obviously can't control?" he said gently, his voice was like a lovers caress against my ear. I shivered and I turned around to stare at him.

His face was so beautiful. I never knew boys could be beautiful, but this one was definitely beautiful. We were standing so close, and he was smiling crookedly down at me. Then the moment was over as soon as we both heard footsteps coming our way.

We sprung apart. I looked guiltily outside the window, while Edward stood there staring at me.

Everybody walked in, the twins were both looking around the house, as if they couldn't believe the Cullen's were actually rich.

Alice stared at Edward and myself then grinned. "You two look like you just killed a cat" she said suspiciously. Emmett barged in then started to chuckle.

"Alice, I doubt they were killing cats here, I think they were exploring the art of making babies" Emmett said. I saw Rosalie giving him a disapproving look and he instantly stopped. "Okay okay, no need to bite my head off" he said defensively. He walked past Edward and Edward smacked his head.

Emmett growled at Edward but kept walking. I stifled a giggle as I watched Emmett's retreating back. Edward looked at me, cocking his eyebrows. I held out a peace sign.

"Okay everyone, before we all leave, I cooked some food. So come on! Dinner's ready!" Esme said happily. I looked at all the food once again then turned towards Esme.

"What the-? Are you trying to feed a bunch of horses or something?" I said , absolutely mystified. Esme let out a laugh, then nodded, "With the boys? I might as well be!" she said good naturedly.

I scratched my head before sitting down right next to Alice. "Brace yourself" she said mysteriously. I looked at her questioningly. All the boys sat down, including Carlisle, Edward's dad.

As the conversation started up in the room, my eyes became wide when I looked at Emmett. He was packing on some fried chicken, lasagne, some salad, and some home made fries. My mouth hanged opened when he slopped on a heap of mash potatoes. Then my eyes traveled around, Jasper was packing on at least 3 slices of lasagne and five pieces of bread.

I let out a choking sound as I stared at my own plate that only had one slice of lasagne. When I looked up I found everybody's gaze on me. Then Edward tried to stifle a snort, but everybody started laughing.

"Did you see her face?!" Edward said between fits of laughter. My face was frozen in the same horrified expression.

After the whole debacle over dinner, we all headed outside and somehow I found myself alone with Edward inside his car.

I sat next to him in awkward silence. I decided to break it ice by coughing loudly.

"So…Tell me, how the hell did I end up in your car?" I said coolly. I chuckled then looked at me.

"You know Alice, ever the pushy one" he said quietly. I frowned the shook my head.

"This is ridiculous" I whispered under my breath. Edward gave me a sideways glance. "Does being in my company really repulse you that much?" he said. I don't know if I was imagining it, but I think I heard a glimmer of hurt in his voice.

I felt my heart sink. I looked at him then looked away. "You know as much as I do the answer to that question" I said in a small voice. I knew he was staring at me. I couldn't bring myself to look at him, for I knew that if I did, I might do something stupid like jump him or something.

I looked out the window and realized that Edward was slowing down. He pulled to a stop on a hiking trail. I looked around confused. I saw Emmett's monster truck, but Emmett wasn't there, neither were the twins, Alice, jasper, Rosalie, or even Mr. and Mrs. Cullen.

I looked towards Edward who looked as confused as I was. I heard his phone beeping, which indicated him receiving a message. He flipped the phone open and read the message. I saw his face turn from puzzlement to annoyance.

He looked up at me then. "They've decided to have a race. My idiot parents decided to join them too" he said monotonously. I let out an exasperated sigh and got out of the car. I waited for Edward to come out, then started walking towards the trail.

"Bella, your going the wrong way" Edward said. He came leveled with me then took my arm. He dragged me towards the other way, where the forest looked thick and a little too scary for my liking.

I frowned deeply. "You didn't tell me hiking was involved!" I said grumpily, as I stared at my boots that had no grips what so ever. I already saw what would happen next. I stepped on a patch of slippery ground then went sliding down. Edward caught my waist before my butt touched the ground.

I groaned. Edward took one look at me then cracked up laughing. Yeah well, he wouldn't be laughing if he knew just how much his touched burnt through the layers of material that I was wearing.

I could feel the heat creeping all the way to my roots, I knew my face was already as red as a tomato. I grunted loudly and got back up my feet, completely ignoring Edward. I started walking, slipping every now and then, then cutting my hands whenever I tried to grab pieces of thorned branches.

I would hear Edward chuckling right behind me, followed by me turning around a shooting him a glare. After a while I realized that we had passed the same gigantic tree at least twice.

I turned around sharply to Edward. "We're lost aren't we?" I said nervously. But to my annoyance, Edward just smiled crookedly.

"I don't know, are we?" he said nonchalantly. I wanted to whack him so bad, but I refrained. "I wouldn't know Edward, seeing as you should be leading the way" I said slowly and patronizingly.

Edward let out a small laugh. "Oh I don't know, I was kind of enjoying watching you run around in circles" he said shrugging. I narrowed my eyes at him and just stood in front of him, two hands on my hips.

I couldn't believe it, he knew that we were lost, but creep that he was, he had let me wander about like a freak. I started making whiny noises when he wouldn't budge.

"Edwarddddddd Culllleeeennnn! Where the hell are wee??" I said in a voice that I knew would irritate him. He covered his ears then half closed his eyes.

"Urgh, shut up, its this way!" he said, pointing towards two big bushes. He pushed the two aside and I gasped. We were on the edge of a clearing. We've been there for a while, and I didn't even know!

I stamped away from Edward. "That was so not funny!" I said irritatingly.

Everybody was already in the clearing, waiting impatiently. After a gigantic series of ranting and lectures (from Mr. and Mrs. Cullen) the game finally started.

Not attracting any attention to myself, I started creeping towards a gigantic lump of rock and tried to hide behind it. But Jasper saw me. He raised his eyebrows then shook his head. _Thank God, _I thought to myself, _he's not going to tell. _But no such luck. Emmett saw me slinking away and instantly stood by my side.

I nervously smiled up at him. "Where do you think your going Swan?" he said mischievously. I heard the twins laughing menacingly at each other.

"Oh yes, I forgot, you absolutely _hate_ sports" Sam and Sean both said in unison. I started backing away as the two of them started _gliding _towards me in such a manner that made me nervous.

Emmett looked from one twin to another and caught on. "Somebody give this girl a bat!" he said in his booming voice, before shoving me on to the diamond.

I don't know what happened, but I never got to say no….I didn't have a choice. I saw the ball coming my way, wheezing towards me. Thinking that the ball was going to bounce on my head, I closed my eyes and wildly swung the bat. I heard the hard ball come in contact with the bat then I heard a squeal. I opened my eyes. It was Rosalie. The ball had nearly hit her.

I looked at her guiltily. Everybody was laughing their asses off, while I kept doing a perfect imitation of a ripened tomato. I dropped the bat then started heading towards the lump of boulder I had seen earlier.

I sat on top of the boulder dejectedly. "Oh, leave the poor girl alone!" I heard Esme. But unfortunately the laughing didn't stop.

But for some reason the laughter suddenly stopped. I slowly looked up, but to my surprise everybody's face had turned impassive. All of them were staring at something behind me.

I looked at each of them one by one, then I looked at Edward. His face had turned from impassive to anger. Edward started walking towards me, extending a hand. I took it as he pulled me off the boulder. I shivered as Edward wrapped one protective arm around my waist. He was still looking at something behind me.

I slowly turned around. I felt my blood turn cold. James and Victoria stood there. And by the looks of things, they had another addition to their little group. James looked at me then smirked. I hardened my stance and without really noticing much, my grip tightened on Edward.

"What are you doing here Malone?" Edward said coldly. Victoria wrapped her arms around James as the three of them started heading our way. I didn't even notice but it turned out the Hale's, the Cullen's, and the Striker twins were already standing directly behind me.

"What? Not very welcoming are you? We thought we'd join you with a friendly game of baseball" he said nastily. "Besides, I would have thought that you would be more friendlier towards me. Lucky his job is not the only thing he lost!" he said, obviously pointing the fact towards me.

I froze. I felt sick. I didn't want anyone to know, especially not the boy who had his arms draped around me. I held my breath and glared at James. Edward was standing so still, I looked up at him to find him staring at me.

"What's he talking about?" he asked, his face was a mask of confusion. I couldn't speak. A big lump was blocking my throat. I tried to say something but all that came out was a squeak.

"Oh…ha ha ha" he laughed, his tone cold, completely lacking humor. "You didn't tell anyone did you? What? Too frightened of me now?" he said menacingly. I could feel my blood boiling. I was starting to shake.

James came even closer, walking towards me. "What's his name? oh yes…Charlie, how's he enjoying life as a jobless man. Come on _Bella. _From the scale of zero to crap" he said slyly, his voice a mere hiss. My heart was beating double time, my hands felt cold.

Then suddenly I heard Emmett's voice. "Why don't you get lost?" Emmett said menacingly, stepping in. I heard James laugh.

"What are you going to do?" then he snorted. "Your all muscles with no brain" he said loudly. I swear I heard Emmett let out a bear growl before he pounced on James. James looked up at him surprisingly then pushed him off, backing away slightly. His cheeks were slightly red as he tried to get Emmett off of him.

I heard Emmett laughing in a low voice. "I might be all muscles, but at least I fight my own battles" Then he looked at Victoria, who looked like she was about to pounce on Emmett. "Now I know who wears the skirt in _your _relationship" he said in a booming voice.

I could hear the twins trying hard to stifle their laughter. They instantly went silent when James sent them both a murderous look.

I could see that he was wavering, and his defenses were weakening seeing as he was pretty much outnumbered. "You're all going to pay for this" he said angrily, looking at all of us. To my surprise I saw Carlisle step out from the back.

"We'll see about that" Carlisle said coldly. The way Carlisle said it made it seem like he knew something about James, a secret perhaps. I watched as James angrily walked off from the field, back to where he came from. Victoria turned to look at me, her eyes completely narrowed, then she was gone. The other guy who came with them lingered on for a little bit. He was looking at all of us guiltily.

"I'm sorry, he can be very _in your face_" he said apologetically. "Please continue whatever you were doing" he added guiltily. We saw James turn around sharply. "Laurent!" he said disgustingly. The boy Laurent bowed his head and followed James obediently.

There was a big chunk of awkward silence before one of the twins broke the ice. "Laurent is pussy whipped" Sam said, feeling the need to point out the obvious. I shook my head.

I looked towards Edward. He had an expression which I've never seen before. His eyes were so cold, and they were directed at me. His gaze blew me away. That wasn't exactly the feedback I expected. I cringed slightly then looked down.

"Can we please just go home now?" I said in a tiny voice. Edward didn't say anything, he just walked ahead of me, not saying a word. I felt my heart gave out. I felt like crying. He was being all cold, and I had no idea why.

I looked around and found Alice standing behind me. She linked arms with me. And when we got to the car park, I watched Edward jump inside the car and drove off without saying a word to me. I was left standing there, looking dejectedly at the fast disappearing silver Volvo.

Alice wrapped her arms around me. "Jasper and I will take you home" she said gently. Once I went inside the car, I let out a small dry sob then looked outside the window. I felt all cold inside. The encounter with James had shaken me, but not as much as the way Edward had acted towards me afterwards.

Sure I wanted to be Edward free, but now that he's acting all cold towards me, I just want things to be fine between us. But I don't know what I did wrong.

"This will all blow over Bella, Edward is just being an idiot" Jasper said comfortingly when we got to my house. I nodded weakly before turning around and walking towards the front door.

How did things go from crap to just complete and utter shit?

I'm sitting on my bed right now. My brain hurts, I've stayed up just thinking. About Edward and his reaction. I know I should be worried about James, but I can't. I realize now that _maybe _I've been in denial about the way I feel about Edward.

I don't like him, God no. I don't even have a crush on him. I've probably said this before, but I'm not sure if I meant it before. Now, everything just seems so right, and for once I'm sure about how I really feel. God help me, I love Edward Cullen.

It's like every thought of me not seeing him ever again, or him never wanting to talk to me is sending daggers straight to my heart.

There's no stopping my feelings for him, bloody hell, its like my heart is on crack, its completely addicted and high on Edward Cullen.

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**Author's note:** I AM SO SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING IN WHAT FEELS LIKE TWO WEEKS!! I'm a very busy little girl, that's the result of selecting art subjects as your electives, gr gr grrrrrr. I'm so sorry guys, I felt so empty, especially checking my email and I don't see a single thing from my awesome fanfiction readers sniff sniff As always thank you so much for the reviews last time, oh my God! thirty more reviews until my target of 200, what do you guys say? Would it finally hit 200 this time?? (closes eyes and starts wishing) tail starts wagging anyway, its the school holidays now!! I can update more! So please review this, unless of course you want me to go on strike :) xo-Rose


	18. Chapter 16

**Author's note: **Hello everyone! I just got my computer back! YAY! My sister took it without telling me. I had unsaved work on it, well half of what I wrote disappeared as well. See how evil siblings can be? But anyway, I was blown away by the amount of reviews I got. I mean the last time I checked, there were only 5 reviews on this chapter, then suddenly whoosh! I got 18. 191 reviews in total. You guys just completely blew me away. Thank you so much. And just so you know…This is the third last episode. So if you want to know how it ends….well **BLOODY WELL REVIEW THEN**. Hehe love you all!

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**Disclaimer: **I'm still wishing that I'm Stephanie Meyer, but we all know I'm not, so…merde!

**Game over**

**Part 16**

**Day 73**

_He hates me, he hates me not…_So which one is it? By the looks of things, I'm guessing it's the former. Edward hadn't talked to me in about a week now. He hasn't looked at me, or even said a single word to me. His cold behaviour is putting a strain on the whole cast of 'Romeo and Juliet' and most of all he was slowly digging a hole in my heart.

It's been a week since that dreadful baseball game, he still hasn't said anything to me. He's still ignoring me at school, and now thanks to him Ms. Culling is making me deal with him. "Maybe he just needs a slight persuasion, dear" she had told me.

I didn't know what I did that was so wrong. You know, wrong enough for him to give me the cold shoulder. Well, at least I use to be clueless, now I know.

I decided to confront Edward this morning, but his answer surprised me and absolutely blew me away…not in a good way either.

I caught up with him during lunch time. Actually I pretty much screamed out his name, but it seemed like he didn't hear me at all. _Hmmm… _

I know I was attracting attention to myself, but I felt the desperate urge to have Edward look at me. I caught up with him and pretty much spun him around to look at me. He looked down at me, the same irritation in his eyes.

"What do you want Swan?" he said roughly.

Whoa! I know! Back up! What was up with the attitude?

I gave him an angry look, my stance was weakening by the minute, and my face was turning red with every look that I got. I forced myself to look at him straight, and tried to hold his gaze. "Why are you acting like a jerk?" I said. That was pretty blunt, but it was the first thing that popped in my head.

Edward snorted to my dismay. "_I'm _being a jerk?" he said slowly, his eyes narrowing. I shivered, it was that cold gaze once again. I shook it off and looked away then looked back at him.

"Can we talk please?!" I said. I hate to say this, but my voice was edging towards desperation. "No Bella, you've been calling the shots for too long now. Whatever you want to say, you can it right here" he replied, his voice was filled with finality.

I groaned desperately and consciously looked around the gathering crowd. "Fine! Then why have you been avoiding me?! I don't deserve to be treated like dirt!" I said with an extra ounce of dignity. Edward just smirked at me and his green eyes froze over.

"Are you sure about that? I mean, you pretty much lead me on. You tell me we should be friends, then you lie to me. Wow, I don't know Isabella, I really don't know" he hissed. I froze. So that's why he was mad at me?

Because I lied? Because I didn't tell him about Charlie being fired?

"Friends don't keep secrets…Look, I'll get over it. But for now…Just don't."

Then he walked away from me.

I felt the guilt a moment too late. When I looked up, he was swallowed up by the throng going inside the cafeteria.

I pushed down the hurt that I was feeling. I went inside the library, away from all the noise, I was the only one inside the library, and once again, I was left with my own thoughts.

* * *

**Day 74**

He's still not talking to me. My whole life is still a mess, Charlie is still jobless, and did I mention Edward hates me?

Renee finally went back to Jacksonville. The house felt empty and quiet without her. Charlie has been going over at Billy's three nights in a row now. I don't know, but I think Charlie said something to Jacob.

He came by this evening when I was home alone.

I heard a tap on the door and I went to open it. My face lit up instantly when I saw Jacob standing there. "Oh Jake, I'm a mess" was the first thing I said to him before hugging him tightly.

For some reason I was able to open up to Jacob. I was able to talk more than I've ever done before. I found myself talking to him, telling him about my true feelings about Edward, and Edward's cold attitude towards me.

"Bella, I know this might be hard to understand, so please don't be so dense when I say this" he started, looking at me for encouragement. I nodded, a signal to tell him to go on.

"No matter which way you look at it, there's only one way to describe that do-erm-Edward's action; he likes you. Simple as that. Lying to him had hurt him badly. He's a lovesick idiot!" he said rationally, looking pleased with himself.

I looked at him doubtfully. "I don't know…If he did, then he would understand…" but I trailed off. I paused for a moment too long.

How could he understand? I never told him anything. I had jumped to the conclusion that if he found out about Charlie he would feel nothing but pity towards me. Would he really have?

Now that I come to think about it, there's just no way of knowing anymore. I jumped the gun, now its too late.

I had told Edward that we should just be friends, but friends don't keep secrets from each other.

Right at that moment, I felt the desperate urge to bang my head against the wall. I looked at Jacob then. "What do I do now? I don't want to let him go Jake" I said in a small voice. Jake gathered me in his arms and hugged me tightly.

"You'll know what to do. I don't have the right to tell you what to do. After all, I want a piece of you too" he said chuckling. I looked at him then, to see if he was serious.

"I know, I know! That ship has sailed away" he said, sounding distant. I felt guilty. I'm really starting to warm up to Jacob. He was like the brother I never had, no kidding, he was definitely my best friend right now seeing as Alice hadn't said a word to me either.

She's a little too pre-occupied with Jasper right now. Did I mention that they've finally came to their senses, had finally caught up with each other, and by the looks of things, they weren't letting go anytime soon.

I'm happy for Alice, so there's no way I was going to spoil anything for her. She's happy, I feel that telling her my feelings would just wreck her mood.

But that still doesn't give me the answer. _What do I do?_

I seem to be asking that very same question a lot lately. I need to pull myself out. I need to fix this.

Uh-oh, I just got a message from the twins: _Meet us at the park near you house_

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**Day 75**

Well…Hello Ms. Fix it! Umm, where do I even begin? Should I drop the bomb or linger around for a little bit?

Hmm, well since its good news, might as well drop the bombshell; It's over. Zilch, kaput! James Malone has left the building, well more like he's been shifted off to some reform school from hell! Hurrah for Bella!

Believe me when I say that I was jumping for joy when I got the call from the twins, then I dropped down just as quickly as I got up. Just because James is gone, doesn't mean Edward still doesn't hate me.

I need to come down from this little cloud I've built around me and face the facts, maybe Edward just doesn't want me back anymore. So just to get my mind off of things, let me explain James Malone's downfall.

You will laugh…not with him, but at him. He's a loser that needs to be spanked (no kinkiness intended).

Sorry, let me take my time. I feel free, so free that I feel like I'm going to inflate (not very flattering, but I can't believe I had the answer of getting rid of him all along, but due to my own stupidity, I failed to notice it!).

So here goes; You know that little text message I got from the twins yesterday? Well I thought they were going to drag me to the park then do something stupid to me, but no, they had news for me.

"James is gone" Sam said in a serious voice. I looked at him as though he had lost his marbles. Then I started laughing like _I _lost my marbles.

"Can you not joke about this please? It makes me sick!" I said uncomfortably. The twins passed a meaningful look between each other, then out of nowhere they released their Cheshire cat smile.

I stood between them feeling like the whole world was about to drop on my head. I could tell that they had done something to James, not that I was at any liberty to complain…but you know…he's still a person….Urgh! Who was I kidding?

To be honest, the only thing going through my mind was _please tell me you killed him, please tell me you killed him, please tell me you killed him. _My mind kept repeating the same words that when another voice spoke, it didn't make any sense to me.

"They're not joking Swan, you of all people should know that us Striker don't joke about serious matters like these" said a lucid voice coming from behind me. In my utter confusion I spun around and my eyes met brilliant hazel eyes.

I was standing in the middle of the park staring at a beautiful brunette who was the spitting image of the two boys standing on each of her side. It was like staring at the dark Sam and Sean.

It was Marie, the oldest Striker sibling. She had attended my school, she graduated two years ago. I stared at her, my eyes mixed with curiosity and confusion. "Marie? What are you doing here?" I asked in a small voice.

I was never close to Marie, hell I was never friends with her. I never spoke to her at school, and I never got to see her after she graduated. I didn't know what to think.

Okay I did, but for dramatic effect, lets pretend I didn't okay? God, this is making me act weird all of a sudden.

So anyway, I stared at her like an idiot for a good five minutes until she gave me an annoyed look. "Are you going to keep staring at me like a gold fish? Because honestly, its creeping me out" Marie said in a sassy voice.

I felt the heat creeping up my cheeks, and I instantly swallowed. "Um, sorry, but what do you mean when you say that James is gone?" I said slowly, trying very hard not to show an inkling of how I was really feeling.

Then I sort of froze when I saw the same smile Sam and Sean had only moments ago pasted on her face. "Well lets just say that I know a little something about lil James that was scandalous enough to have daddy dearest send him to reform school" she said coolly. I shivered slightly as the wind blew, making me shiver and weak at the knees.

It turned out that Marie use to date James Malone and had broken up with him due to some 'private' reasoning which instantly made me curious, and like what they always say _Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. _

All the while all I could think about was, _God, what did you do? _I could hear my mocking voice asking the same question to James, but of course if I had asked that question, the more realistic term of what he would do to me would be 'bite my head off'.

James did something to Marie, **that **I know. And instead of telling authority, she did it the Striker way…of course, I mean why did it even surprise me? (insert intense eye rolling). Now she's out to get him, and I quote, "I will never leave him alone until he's in hell!" she said this with such wrath that I wanted to scratch my head.

The fact that she was helping me still surprised me though. But before I dwell more on that fact, she told me something else that hit me like a freight train. "And oh yes, thanks to that awesome Doctor, Mr. Malone finally believed all the hype about his psycho son!" she said in a wild voice, her hands fisting to her sides.

I looked at her, it seemed my heart had started beating double time. "What doctor are you talking about?" I said, my pitch going higher. Marie looked thoughtful for a second as she pondered on the name of the Doctor.

"I think it was Cummings, no, maybe it was Calvin? I know it starts with a C" she said vaguely, then just like that my brain switched on straight away. "Doctor Cullen?" I said, my voice was shaking.

Marie looked at me then. "Yes! That's him, do you know him? I met him, and I have to say, he's rather tasty for an old guy…" Marie ranted on as I stayed silent.

What could Carlisle have done to change everything?

Marie read the confusion and gave me my answer straight away. "Well you see, this Carlisle, it turned out that he's a business associate of the Malone's. In other words, he's a kiss ass Doctor, but you already know that. I went over to the Malone mansion in Seattle and attempted to make Mr. Malone see reason" she said rationally, "After all, the guy had the right to know that his son is a prick right?" she said in a strong voice, all the while I had picked up a leaf and was already half way with tearing it apart.

"So anyway, like usual I got kicked out of the bastard's office, and just as usual, I was screaming out profanities to make him see reason!" she said, looking utterly serious.

"On my way out I accidentally rammed in to Doctor Cullen. And it seems he's also got unsettled business with James the retard, something about a baseball game he gate crashed, before I knew it, Mr. Malone was listening to me and Dr. Cullen. It was so bizarre. And get this" Marie said, her voice suddenly turned serious.

"It turned out that Mr. Cullen is this big hot shot who owns hospitals around the world, so there was no way in hell Mr. Malone could afford to lose him as an associate. Then as soon as I started talking, backed up by Dr. Cullen of course, Mr. Malone finally came to accept the truth…That his son is a douche bag" Marie ended in a flourish, sounding utterly pleased with herself.

I was gaping like a moron, I didn't know what to think. If that's true then that would explain how Alice seemed to have endless cash for shopping, and how Edward can spend so much on cars.

Moving to Forks, I thought everything would be normal, you know, normal kids, normal town. But not so much. Marie Striker pretty much ruined the way I looked at the town.

But all the same, I couldn't help this heavy feeling rising up inside of me. Was I really that dense? The Cullen's had always been so wealthy, yet none of them felt like sharing the fact that they were multi millionaires.

Geez-Louis, Now I know how Edward felt. God it feels like somebody just kicked my balls, which is pretty impossible seeing as I don't have any, but from what I've heard it's a very bad, heart wrenching feeling.

I suddenly felt sick, I knew I had to go and talk to Carlisle and thank him, but what do I even say to him? Thank you would definitely suffice, but what do I do about Edward. I can't just leave everything hanging.

I looked from one Striker to another and sighed mentally. "Can one of you give me a ride to the Cullen's?"

The twins instantly raised their hands but Marie swatted them away like flies. "No way, if the two of you drove, she's not going to make it in one piece. Psychos" she uttered, whispering the last word. Sam and Sean glared at her as I tried to stifle a giggle.

The twins looked at me as if I'd betrayed them. "She's got a point you know" I added, shrugging.

Marie and I both headed towards her car and nearly fainted, well, _I _nearly fainted, for parked in front of me was the most ludicrous car that just by looking at it told me that it was anything but slow. I swallowed hard and tried to find my way inside.

I heard Marie giggling behind me. "Um, Bella? You might want to stand back" she said, smiling mischievously. Why she was driving a supercharged V8 type of car, I will never know. First hot rods, then the Swedish Koenigsegg supercar. Don't ask me how I even know this. I think hanging around Sam Striker has finally gone through my brain!

Surprisingly I found that Marie was a safe driver. Oh she was still running over the speed limit alright, but not too much like the twins or even Edward.

On the way to The Cullen's house (Or should I say mansion?) I was struck by a very awkward silence. The silence was so deafening that I thought I was going to go mad. I gave Marie a sideways look trying to figure her out.

Maybe she didn't just help me because she wanted revenge on James, perhaps she wanted to really help me…like you know, she actually cares about me getting screwed over.

Marie sensed my gaze on her and she looked at me for a second before redirecting her gaze back to the road. "I'm guessing your wondering why I'm doing this for you?" she said in a solemn voice. I shrugged, a gesture that she took as encouragement to go on.

"Well, before you came the twins were always so weird and moody. Not to say that they aren't already, but you know, they were worst before. Being the rich kids made them smug, and having you around seemed to bring them back to Earth. And would you believe it? Their actually being nice to me now, when before all I got was bad names and pranks being pulled on me" Marie laughed. I could totally imagine what she was saying, the twins were insane, probably more when I first met them.

I fell quiet once again and just looked out my dash board. I sighed, "Thanks" I whispered. Marie looked at me then smiled. "Hey no sweat, its not everyday you get to save a Striker, let alone the twins" she said coolly. I looked at Marie then, admiring her guts and half wishing I had the same.

I felt like crying when we got to the Cullen's house. I got off the car and headed slowly towards the house. I was about to press the door bell when I the door swung open. Alice was smiling down at me, her face glowing.

Then she jumped on me and gave me a spine breaking bear hug. "OMG BELLA! WHYDIDN'TYOUCOMEANDSEEMEEARLIER?WEHAVESOMUCHTOTALKABOUT!" she said rashly while I let her drag me inside. She was still chattering on when Jasper descended the stairs and gave me a wan smile.

I smiled back at him then looked down at Alice. "I'm actually here to see Carlisle, if you don't mind. I'll talk to you later, okay?" I said in a soft voice.

Alice nodded and directed me straight to Carlisle's office. I took a breath before knocking twice. "Come in" I heard him say from the other side. I opened the door and was slightly shocked by the gigantic room. It was all hardwood from the ceiling to the floor. Surrounding the room were photographs, some I recognised as Edward, Alice, and Emmett, while others I didn't know at all. I looked curiously at one of the photographs that had about four men in it, including Carlisle.

I heard a cough from my left and I jumped. I smiled sheepishly at Carlisle before walking awkwardly towards him. "Is there anything I can do for you Bella?" he asked gently, pointing at the chair, motioning for me to sit down.

I shook my head and politely refused. "Oh no, I won't be long. I'm here to say thank you. I heard from the Striker's about what you did. Thank you so much…For saving me" I said slowly. I didn't know what else to say.

I was starting to sound like a broken record. "Bella, don't worry about it. You're like a daughter to me. Nobody dares to hurt one of my family" he said solemnly. I knew my lips were starting to quiver. That was the nicest thing I've heard in a long time.

I felt speechless, the silence was taking over once again and I couldn't do anything about it. I heard a sigh and I looked at Mr. Cullen. "Is there anything else dear?" he said, his eyes were scrutinising me, looking at me as if he could see right through me. I shrugged slightly and smiled.

"Thanks again" I said, before turning around to leave. Then I was abruptly stopped. "I think you need to talk to Edward dear. After all it was his idea to have me confront Alastair Malone. Edward…really cares about you, you know?" he said softly. I spun around and tried to read his eyes. But all I could find was the truth, nothing more, nothing less.

I slowly walked out of the room. My head was hurting so badly. I felt like how I felt when I first found out Santa Claus wasn't real. The confusion was making my head spin and I somehow ended up standing in front of Edward's room, just staring at the door.

Instead of going inside, I went back home, like the coward that I was.

So here I am once again. In bed. I've finally decided on my next move. I have to make things right again. I just sent Edward a message ten minutes ago. So, lets all crossed our fingers and hope, for once, that Isabella Swan doesn't screw this up.

* * *

**Fr. Bella**

**To: Edward**

I surrender, I'm every bad word in the dictionary

So please come and see me!

Actually no, you have no choice,

I'm coming over

xo

Bella


	19. Chapter 17

**DISCLAIMER:** I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT, STEPHENIE MEYER DOES, NOW THAT WE'VE ESTABLISHED THAT, ON WITH THE STORY!

new author's note: oi! if i don't get anymore reviews i'm not going to update the next one!! get typing guys! It's not over yet!!

**And so it ends…well its about to anyway**

**Part 17**

_**Day 76**_

_I'm in a bathroom right now. Who's bathroom? I'm not going to say, at least until I grasp everything and finally accept the fact that __no I'm not dreaming. _

I can see my reflection. I look exactly the same. The same brown eyes, the same heart shaped face, the same lips, the same flat brown hair. Weirdly enough, I'm still the same girl. But somehow I feel like the whole world had just been lifted off my shoulder.

So much happened yesterday. So much so that I think it pretty much changed my life. Moving to Forks I had wanted peace, but I never knew it could be this…_sweet. _

I left the house in such a hurry that I almost knocked into Charlie on the way out. "Bella? Where are you going?! I have good news!" he said in an excited voice. But…I guiltily admit, I ignored him. I sort of flew past him and ran straight to my red Chevy truck.

"Sorry dad, be back later!" I rushed. My heart was pumping really hard as I started the car. I had only one thing in mind, and that was to face Edward and finally tell him how I was an idiot and that I really loved him.

As I sped down the road, half way to the Cullen's house I heard a sound that made my heart froze. My car rattled weakly. I ignored the sound, I momentarily closed my eyes and kept on driving.

It made the rattling sound again, but this time it was stronger. I could see smoke coming out of my car, then I heard a bang. I screamed out loud and stepped on the breaks. I clutched my heart as the smoke became more noticeable.

To my frustration I whacked the dashboard with my hands. I jumped out of the car and eyed the front shrewdly. "You piece of shit! Why??" I screamed out loud. I sounded like a maniac, but I didn't care, there wasn't anyone within miles from where I stood kicking my car.

Of all places, it just had to stop right in the middle of no where. I looked around and to my dismay, I was surrounded by ugly moss covered trees. Then just to add the cherry on such a wonderful day, it started raining. No it wasn't a light drizzle. It was pretty much pissing down like in the movies. My clothes got soaked and was sticking to my skin.

I yelled in my frustration and made the decision of walking to the Cullen's house. I couldn't give a crap. I was going to get there even if I got hit by a bus! I grabbed the car keys and started walking towards the direction of Edward's house.

I was getting very cold, seeing as I flew out of the house only wearing track pants and a singlet. Another idiot mistake on my part.

I absolutely hated rain, I knew for sure that I looked like a drowned dog, with extra added poopiness to it. It seemed like God was punishing me for being so dense. I could hear a car approaching. From the sound of it, it was heading this way at such a fast phase too.

As it passed me, I recognized the car instantly. It was a silver Volvo. It went past me, splashing a muddy puddle on me. _If that was Edward, then its pretty pointless now. _I had thought to myself. I abruptly stopped, as if every bad things that happened this year suddenly came crashing down on me. I couldn't help it, I could hold it in anymore.

I felt like somebody stole my lollipop. I started crying my heart out. Sobbing to nobody in particular. I sat on the ground and for a moment I actually started thrashing about like a mad woman. That's when I heard a car coming from behind me.

I covered my eyes with my fingers and I kept on crying like there's no tomorrow. I heard the car stop right next to me and I jumped up instantly. The car was too close for comfort. I got up and started walking the opposite way. Aware of the door opening. I didn't bother looking at who it was. I was way too freaked out already.

"Bella! Wait!" I heard someone calling. I abruptly stopped. I would recognise that voice anywhere in the world. The same velvet voice that had my heart pounding uncontrollably. I turned around to my Edward standing there in the pouring rain.

I looked at him and sniffed. "I was going to come and see you I swear!" I squeaked to my annoyance. He was walking slowly towards me. "I know" he said loudly enough for me to hear. As he got closer, I got even more nervous. _Oh God please don't let me chicken out now…_

I mentally said. He was standing so close now that I could help it. I was starting to babble. "See I was half way there, then my car broke, then it started smoking up, it looked like it was going to explode. Since I'm surrounded by trees, I didn't know what else to do. And these trees really freak me out. You know, they kinda' look like they wanna eat me and all!" I am such a freak! I mean I just couldn't shut up.

I was talking so fast, and some of the stuff I was saying was making no sense at all. Edward had turned my brain to mush just by staring at me. And that's exactly what he was doing. He was staring at me with such a serious expression on his face.

I was very much aware that I was having a freak break down right in front of him, and what do you know? I guess he saw me fall to pieces in front of him.

He was walking even closer towards me, I wanted to back up, but I couldn't I felt like my feet were rooted to the spot. "Bella, your babbling" he said softly. His voice was creating havoc in my senses, if I didn't watch myself, I would have ended up doing something stupid, oh I don't know, like jump his bones or something.

I looked to my sides and peeling my gaze away from him. "I know, I know! I'm babbling, call me babble queen! But I wanted to talk to you. That message I sent you was so cheesy, I'm so sorry. I just pretty much wanted to see you, to tell you I'm sorry for being such an ass, for not telling you about Charlie, for being a big idiot in general, and also that I love you, like as much as-" I blurted out, but I was abruptly cut off.

Edward was so close now, his invasion of my personal space made me feel comfortable instead of freaked out. "What did you just say?" he said lowly, staring at me fully now.

My heart was hammering away like it was on crack. I could hear ringing in my ears as the two of us got soaked to oblivion. "I'm sorry?" I offered weakly. Edward shook his head abruptly.

"No, what did you say after that?" he said, starting to sound edgy. I shivered slightly. "I'm an idiot?" I said, obviously stalling. Edward let out a frustrated sound and I flinched slightly.

"Iloveyou?!" I squeaked, the words were intangible. I could see a ghost of a smile starting to show. He held my shoulders, "Sorry, what?" he said. He knew exactly what I said, but he was beating around the bush.

"I love you" I said in a lower voice. Edward chuckled then shook me once again. "sorry, I didn't quiet catch that" he said, his crooked smile totally pasted on his beautiful face.

I stared at him for a whole minute before running up to the back of my Chevy truck. I swallowed before turning to look at him. I held up my arms and closed my eyes. "I said…" I started, taking a deep breath I yelled. "I LOVE YOU EDWARD CULLEN!!" I felt out of breath, but my heart soared as soon as I saw Edward's face.

He was smiling so much, and for once, I didn't care that I looked ridiculous, not to mention I was doing an awesome impersonation of a drowned dog, but whatever.

Edward started walking towards me. I jumped wagged around insanely. "I love you" I said in a weak voice. And you know how I'm such a klutz? Well all the wagging and the jumping got the better of me, I went leaning down like the tower of Pisa before Edward caught me in his arms.

"Are you a damsel in distress?" he said in a silky voice. I felt the electric charge that started from the tips of my fingers all the way to my hair roots. I shivered slightly. All of the I love you's seemed to have drained me out a little bit.

I nodded slowly. "Yup, I'm a damsel and I'm in distress" I said weakly before pulling myself up.

Edward was staring at me so intensely that I started fidgeting under his scrutiny. He let out an amused laugh before putting two hands on both my shoulders to steady me. I stopped abruptly and for once, we were both standing still just staring at each other.

I sucked in his scent like he was the very air that I breathed. My hair was sticking to my face, but I didn't care. All that really mattered was Edward and that moment.

He pushed the hair away from my face, and I felt like squirming. Not for the first time that day I started blabbing once again about nothing at all, but I was cut off instantly.

….

Yes…He kissed me.

….

But damn, now that I think about it, I was such an idiot. I pulled away from him…actually pulled away! "It's not bad enough you catch me looking like this, it just has to be pissing down on us, I mean cliché much? And you know-" I really should practice putting a lid on it.

Edward let out a frustrated laugh and covered my mouth with his hands. "Shut up" he said, and with those words he pretty much swept me off my feet. All the words died in my mouth quiet literally.

He was cutting out my air supply but I didn't care. All that mattered was he was there with me. I finally eased up a bit and snaked my arms around his neck and savoured every moment of it. All sane thoughts went out the window as we both fell on the truck floor.

We both went down with a thud, Edward cushioned my blow and we kept going like nothing happened at all. I melted in to him, good thing we were both already on the floor, seeing as my weak knees would have given out if we stayed standing.

Edward was breathing really heavily as I ran my fingers through his hair. Our tongues clashed, and I shivered at the delicious feel he was evoking in me.

And then, when he finally let go, I was left speechless. I couldn't hear anything over the erratic beating of my heart.

"Edward…" the words were barely inaudible over the rain and my palpitating heart. Edward wrapped his arms around me and kissed my forehead. "I know…" he said.

I felt like bursting in to song and dance but cough I obviously refrained. I closed my eyes and buried my face on his wet shirt. "You're an alien aren't you? Coz' that kiss was out of this world" Edward whispered, grinning like an idiot.

I snorted, quite unladylike of me.

"That was lame" I laughed, tightening my grip on his waist. I loved the feel of the vibrations on his chest as he laughed too. "Yeah I know" then we both started laughing.

After a while, silence fell over us once more and we stayed in the back of my truck under the pouring rain. Not thinking much of the consequences. Besides, I felt too comfortable and warm in his arms, which is pretty weird considering it was raining heavily.

After a long silence Edward looked at me with a weird look on his face. "What's your favourite colour?" he said curiously. I stared at him as if he was on crack. "Er…Brown? Why are you asking?" I asked suspiciously.

He ran a finger over my frown lines and shrugged. "I want to know everything about you" he said casually. My breath caught and I turned a crimson colour.

"Why brown?" he said curiously. He actually looked interested, like he really wanted to know. I thought for a second before speaking once again. "It's the colour of soil and should be the colour of the trees, it's a warm colour, and I miss warmth. Though I can't say I'm really complaining right now" I said cheekily, grinning from ear to ear.

Edward laughed and shot me another question. "What's your favourite book?" he asked. I said the first thing that popped in my head. "Wuthering Heights" I said abruptly.

"What's your favourite food?"

"Ice cream"

"Who's your favourite male fictional character?" he was utterly distracting me. He was twirling a strand of my hair around his fingers. It took me a moment to register what he said to me.

"Um…Romeo…" I blushed furiously at this. He looked down at me and grinned, running a finger down my arm until it hit my fingers. He fitted his fingers through the crevasses of my own. I stared at our intertwined hands, totally distracted.

"What's your favourite gemstone?" he fired at me.

"Emerald" I said without thinking. Then I looked at his eyes and blushed once again. Edward stared at me as if I was the biggest enigma that stepped on the face of the Earth.

"You know? I wish I could read your mind" he said distractedly. I let out a tiny animal noise then. "Um…I'm happy you can't or else the way you look at me would change forever" I said in a tiny voice.

"Why? Do you have perverted thoughts about me?" he said grinning, cocking up an eyebrow. I flushed red and slapped his arm playfully. "No…I don't have perverted thoughts about you…at all!" I said, quite unconvincingly. I felt like letting out a squeal then, especially when Edward started looking at me like I was something on the lunch menu and he hasn't eaten for about a week.

He started tickling me on my side. "Is that so?" he said mischievously. Then he growled and did some intense tickling for five minutes none stop, while I felt like I was going to die from laughter.

Is that even possible?

I pushed him away before I peed my pants.

We pulled apart when we heard a horn being blasted at us. A group of people on the community bus were giving us wolf whistles, and one teenage boy stuck out his head and yelled out "Get a room!"

I coughed loudly and smiled at Edward. "I think its time we get out of here unless you want to get a kiss ass cold!" I laughingly said. Edward pulled me up and helped me off my truck.

"Uh…I almost forgot, my truck's broken down. Mind giving me a lift?" I asked. But he wasn't there when I turned around. I felt hands snake themselves around my waist and I turned around to face him.

"Well?" I asked. He leaned down to give me a peck on the lips that still left me reeling for air. He mutely nodded and dragged me to the silver Volvo.

Despite being kiss drunk and all, I still didn't miss out on the screaming and shrieking once Edward started on the road like a maniac on a mission.

When we got to the house, his abrupt breaking would have sent me through the window if I wasn't my seatbelt. I turned towards him still clutching my chest and breathing heavily.

"Edward Cullen! You are going to be the death of me!" I yelled at him. Edward just laughed and tried to pull me to him. The door opened and Alice and Emmett stood there grinning at us.

"Ahh, a young lovers spat! How cute!" Alice said sweetly while Emmett snorted. I narrowed my eyes at the two of them and stuck my tongue out.

"About time too!" Emmett added. I blushed even more and Emmett just continued laughing. "Stop harassing them you two" came Jasper's voice. He snaked an arm around Alice and kissed her cheek and looked down at her affectionately.

"Urgh ew! Can you not do that to my sister in front of me please?" Edward said repulsed. Alice just smiled sardonically at him. "Says the hypocrite, play it safe kids" she said before turning around and disappearing inside the house.

Then once again we were left on our own. Edward turned towards me and bowed deeply. "Shall we?" looking like the perfect epitome of a gentleman.

I stifled a giggle and curtsied before taking his arm. We walked through the door on to a series of wolf whistles from Alice and Emmett.

After forcing me in to one of his shirts I ended up cuddling up to him. I felt shy, but I wanted to mess around with him, and also I wanted to see how he would react.

I took two of my index fingers and started drawing patterns on his then, patterns that lead to his stomach. My mouth almost watered when I felt evidence of a six pack. I smiled to myself when I felt him twitched.

Okay, I swear to all thing holy I wasn't going to let my fingers stray _that far, _when Edward grabbed my curious fingers and gripped them between his hands. "Woman! Are you trying to kill me?" he said in a husky voice that was nothing like his calm velvet tone.

I looked at his eyes and he looked like he was ready to jump me. "Yeah as a matter of fact I am" I said shyly. I jumped on top of him, my face inched closer to his. _oh how the tables have turned. _"I want you to die a happy man" I said in a soft voice.

I know that I was seducing him, how it might have looked, I don't know. Hopefully it didn't sound too pathetic! Or else, I could die right now, in Edward's bathroom.

Edward switched our places so he ended up on top of me. I grabbed his neck and kissed him back, I reached for the shirt that he was wearing and was about to yank it off of him when Edward growled and took hold of both my hands.

"Will you stop taking my clothes off!" he said, trying to sound rational. I felt like I was about to get lectured by my parents as Edward looked at me straight in the eyes. I tried to look at anything but his eyes. Rejection kind of sucks you know?

"Aw Bella don't be like that. If you think clearly, now is not the right time" he said gently, lifting my face up so he could look at my eyes. "You've only been my girlfriend for two hours. Don't you think that's rushing things a bit?" he said softly. But I wasn't paying attention.

He had called me his girlfriend….his _girlfriend! _(Insert mad giggling fit) okay moving on!

I looked at him square in the eyes. "So I'm your girlfriend now?" I said slowly. Edward froze. "Well yeah…aren't you?" he asked hesitantly, his eyes instantly becoming guarded right before my eyes.

I smiled shyly up at him then blushed. "Only if you want me to be" I said in a tiny voice. I looked away, counting to a hundred. I felt his arms around me, then he pulled me down a kissed me deeply.

"You're my girlfriend, end of discussion" he said firmly. I couldn't help it, a giggle escaped me as I looked at him. "Say it again" I said in a small voice.

"Say what again?" he said piercing me with his eyes.

"Call me you girlfriend again" I said hesitatingly.

Edward laughed out loud and kissed my cheek.

"See that girl over there with the heart shaped face, pretty chocolate eyes, yup the one that just tripped! That's my girlfriend Bella" he whispered in my ears. I whacked his arm lightly for the 'tripping over' comment, then gave him a shy kiss on the cheeks.

"Your wonderful you know that?" he said softly, running a finger through my hair.

I shrugged modestly. "Yeah, my parents think so too!" and so the babble started up again, until of course he told me to shut up and kiss him.

Funny how things turned out. James is somewhere in LaLa land somewhere getting his ass beat into shape, Victoria is God knows where, Alice is with Jasper, Jessica Stanley and Lauren are still annoying, and for me? Well…I can't say I've changed much now.

I can see my reflection right now, I look the same, the same brown eyes, the same hair, same heart shape face. The difference? I think I'm glowing.

* * *

**Day 76 (Much later)**

Uh…okay I fell asleep on the bed…right next to Edward, but I swear nothing happened! But that's not what I came to write here…When Edward woke me up for dinner he reminded me of something that completely left my mind.

"Uh Bella?"

"Yes?"

"It's in two days"

"What's in two days?"

"You know"

"No I don't know"

"The play is in two days"

Yet, the only thing that popped in my head was the awful F word, which I yelled out as I fell off the bed with a loud thump!

I'm screwed! Two days? TWO FRIGGIN DAYS??

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

* * *

**author's note:** hey everyone, since this is about to end, i just want to say thank you so much for reading this story. when i checked my reviews today i nearly squealed...199, lol were you guys holding out or what? well thanks so much, i hope you like this second last chapter. next chapter would be the romeo and juliet play. please please please leave a review, you know how much i love reviews!!

If you guys have any questions just ask me. it's been such an antagonizing journey, with extra added urghness to it. So I'm going to go off and sing my little heart out (I'm a singer, duty calls you know) and when I check my reviews tomorrow, it better hit the 200 mark :0) so yeah...i better get loads, or else you guys won't know how the play turns out :) its worth it!!

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	20. Chapter 18

_**DISCLAIMER: **__As much I like telling drunk people in pubs that my name is Stephenie Meyer, that fact will never come true. Since there is only one Stephenie Meyer! __**SHOWER ME WITH REVIEWS FOR THE LAST TIME GUYS!**_

_**The curtain finally closes**_

_**Part 18**_

_**Day 79 (15 minutes until show opens)**_

You know what? Whoever invented corsets is an idiot. Sure I feel medieval, sure my boobs look so big to the point that its about to sprawl out of my dress! But no big deal. Like what Ms. Culling has continuously been telling me;_Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out. _Yeah well buddy, I would gladly do the breathing exercises, BUT I CANT!

My nerves is currently going haywire, and Ms. Culling had forced me to wear these death traps they call heels. And to top it all off, Edward had gone missing. I don't know where he is! I could really do with some of the magic he always weaves. You know, the one where he stands close to me and I stop breathing. Because frankly, the corset is not doing a good job. I would rather faint than face the crowd right now.

I can see Alice from where I am standing (Yes, I'm standing up, because I'm scared that if I sat down, my ribs are going to crack open!), and surprise, surprise! She's making out with Jasper the golden boy. I understand that they love each other, but I need some love! I feel like my head is about to explode!

I don't even know why I am so worried. I know all of my lines, I know all of my entrances and exits, and best of all, I've learnt how to control myself during kissing scenes with Edward. Just mentally sing the alphabet backwards. But I can't guarantee you that its going to work though, I haven't exactly tried it out yet. Mostly because I have this habit of forgetting things whenever Edward gets too close, like my name for example.

...

_He's still not here! Why isn't he here yet?_

...

I have to stop freaking out before I get an aneurism.

People has been very supportive. Jacob actually came over earlier to give me the best luck, while Mike came up and tried to give me an awkward hug. We were hugging lopsidedly when I gave Emmett a pleading look. Just like a knight in shining armour, he stalked right next to Mike and gave him a very evil look that made _me _nervous.

Edward also met me in front of my locker this morning to give me a quick kiss and just like that he was gone.

And to top it all off, my imagination seems a little restless as of late. It's making me think of stupid thoughts, and trust me, stupid thoughts is not exactly what I need in my present state of mind.

In the midst of everything that's happened, I realised something. Since Edward and I hooked up, it didn't really mean that we were officially together. I mean…Don't the guys usually ask the girls if they want to be their girlfriend? Embarrassingly enough, I have no idea how to answer that. I've never had a boyfriend before, so I wouldn't know.

Wait, on second thought…I remember one particular memory after our make out session on his bed…He had called me his girlfriend…so I must be. Oh I'm just being an odd little girl! I really should just shut it.

Uh-oh, Ms. Culling is telling us to mentally prepare ourselves for the show.

Right _be Juliet, be Juliet, be Juliet._

* * *

**Day 80**

You know? I don't know what I really expected. My life has turned out so weirdly, I never expected for any of this to EVER happen to me. Good things happen, I know that, Just not to me. In my opinion if people could bottle up my luck, they would have one weapon of mass destruction on their hands.

I always questioned if good luck even existed. But after last night, it became clear to me that even the person who's got the worst luck in the world can be lucky.

Since Edward wasn't there yet, I had to mentally prepare myself, but it didn't help. Ms, Culling got me to stand on the wing so I could see what was happening on stage. And that's when I saw him. Boy did I feel sheepish.

I completely forgot that Edward was suppose to enter from stage left. When I saw him smiling at me, I felt like banging my head against the set.

The lights went off backstage and I heard Emmett's announcer voice over the darkness.

"_Two households, both alike in dignity._

_In fair Verona (where we lay out scene)_

_From ancient grudge break to new mutiny_

_Where civil blood makes civil hands unclean"_

I tried to focus on what Emmett was saying, but my lips couldn't help smiling back at Edward. He was pointing at me and mouthing the word 'beautiful'. I blushed furiously as I tried to attempt a very clumsy curtsy.

There was a long speech between the two boys who played Sampson and Gregory, the Capulet's servant, before Edward's entrance in ACT one, where he pretty much whine on about how much he loves some girl, and ironically enough, the girls name is Rosaline.

At the mention of Rosaline's name, my gaze darted towards Rosalie's. Despite the fact that she walked out on the first day, it didn't seem to stop her from hanging around backstage. She was sitting on Emmett's lap, completely distracting him.

Even though Emmett is not in our theatre class, because of all the help he's been doing, Ms. Culling actually gave him little roles to play. Including a servant boy of the Capulets who was suppose to make an entrance, which Emmett completely missed. I could see Ms. Culling shaking her head from the back. Rosalie was twirling her fingers through Emmett's dark curls.

I stifled my laughter and focused back on what was happening on stage.

I looked at Jasper and Edward on stage. Weirdly enough, 'something' happened to Mike, so he couldn't play the part of Benvolio. Jasper conveniently enough was able to learn all of the lines.

My heart started beating insanely once again as my entrance loomed ahead. They were talking about gatecrashing the ball that was to take place in the Capulets household.

"_I'll go along no such sight to be shown,_

_But to rejoice in splendour of mine own"_

Edward's lines closed ACT one scene two, and lead straight to my entrance.

When I walked on stage I momentarily froze. The auditorium was packed, and the lights was on full, so my eyes squinted just a little bit. But then the girl who played Nurse dragged me. Thank God for the method acting on her part.

Despite my slight hiccup at the beginning, the scene went perfectly. At one point I heard Jacob yell out my name, followed by hoots and cheers from others. I knew exactly who they were. I made a mental note; _Must kill the La Push lot. _I blushed thoroughly and was glad when the scene was finished.

I exited calmly, but as soon as I was out of the stage, I ran straight to my dressing room and changed to my ball gown. I heard someone come in as I struggled to do up the corset. I felt cold hands on my back and I quickly spun around.

My eyes collided with Edward's emerald gaze and once again I was lost. I squeaked slightly and spoke. "Edward! Your on now! Go! Go!" I said hurriedly. He kissed my cheek before dashing on stage.

I closed my eyes and tried to find my inner peace once again, and walked back to the wings. As the fanfare began I heaved heavily. This was the scene I was most excited and worried about. I wondered if people would be able to see the so called chemistry Ms. Culling was talking about? If so, then we were in trouble. What if people saw right through me, and found out just how badly I was already in?

I walked in with Lauren (she played Lady Capulet) and the girl who played Nurse, whose name I still can't quite remember.

I waited for Capulet to finish his line, and my dreaded scene came. I grabbed some boys waist and we began dancing. Luckily for me, he was experienced. I stepped on his toes a couple of times, but nobody noticed. Under the light, I was beginning to feel light headed. The corset was still crushing me, and my eyes kept lingering towards Edward's tights clad butt.

As mine and Edward's scene came, my heart began its erratic rhythm once again. I could feel the fluttering inside my stomach as I tried to do my best at playing the modest girl, and lead Edward on in a chase. If I had it my way I would have totally just given him way right there and then and let him take me savagely. But I didn't, so tough huh?

"_Ay, pilgrim, lips that they must use in prayer" _I said softly, going behind one of the centre pieces. Edward followed, getting a hold on the back of my ball gown. As he looked at me, he had a certain twinkle in his eyes that I found irresistible.

"O then, dear saint, let lips do what hands do: they pray grant thou, lest faith turn to despair," he said, his face inching closer to mine. But everything was choreographed. I had to push him away lightly. Don't ask me, Ms. Culling's rule.

Juliet was such a tease, now that I come to think about it.

"Saints do not move, though grant for prayers' sake" I said smartly, smiling evilly at Edward. Edward feigned helplessness, and grabbed both of my hands brushing them softly before looking in to my eyes.

I could feel his lips brushing my ears as he whispered. "Then move not while my prayer's effect I take. Thus my lips, by thine, my sin is purg'd" he touched my lips and I trembled slightly. He bent his head and kissed me softly. I closed my eyes and stopped breathing all together.

I heard a couple of sighs from the crowd when I opened my eyes. "Then have my lips the sin that they have took" I said earnestly. Edward smiled jovially at me as he heavily said, "Sin from my lips? O trespass sweetly urg'd! Give me my sin again!" and with that he grabbed me again and we were kissing like there's no tomorrow.

I'm sure that the kiss went a little longer than it should have since we heard a loud cough from backstage. Edward and I sprung apart as I tried to remember my line. I was mentally blank as I stared at Edward.

He moved closer once again. "I know…I kiss by th' book" he said softly, completely saving me from complete humiliation. I'm sure he received kudos for that from Ms. Culling.

I blushed intensely. My cheeks were absolutely red as I looked at him. I heard giggling from the crowd and some from backstage.

As the scene ended, I wanted to bang my head against the fake banister.

Then I groaned slightly when I was reminded which act was coming up; The balcony scene. Just like that first time we did the scene, I felt like I was going to throw up. But Edward's eyes had a calming effect on me. So everything went smoothly.

As the play went on, I was glad that it was nearly over.

And when I finally killed myself, I was glad to just lay down and stay quiet until the applause died and the lights went off. The curtain finally closed.

I opened my eyes to find Edward staring intently at me. He kissed my forehead, then my nose, and finally my lips. We were kissing on top of a fake tomb, and something about that moment clicked. I realized that I was stupid to think that I needed confirmation from him that we were together. It was almost inevitable, we were bound to get together.

From the moment we met, the moment he laid eyes on me (actually, he looked at me like I was the worst kind of parasite alive), the moment he touched me, then finally, from the moment we first kissed, I knew somewhere deep inside that this thing between us was going to turn in to something beautiful.

We heard intense coughing from backstage and we were forced to move away from each other. He held my hand as everybody moved around us, forming our final bows. As the curtain opened once again, the auditorium burst in applause, and I could see Charlie in the audience.

I could also see Jacob, I noticed the sulphurous look on his face as he watched mine and Edward's intertwined fingers.

As Edward and I stepped up to do our final bow, he took me by surprise when he bent and kissed my cheeks. I flushed intensely, and there were catcalls from the audience, and some 'boo!' from the La Push boys. I shrugged and looked at Edward happily.

As the curtain closed I let out a big breath and closed my eyes. I felt so ecstatic. There I stood and recounted all the bad things that happened to me. I let out a big sigh, and hugged Edward tightly.

Later that night as I laid in bed, I heard pebbles being thrown at my window. I quickly got up and cautiously opened it. I looked around and found nobody under my window. i saw movement from behind the tree in the front yard and squinted. I saw somebody move and I almost gasped when I saw Edward moving away from the tree.

He ran closer, so he was right under my window.

"What are you doing here?" I whispered. He bowed to me and smiled. "I'm being Romeo! Or the prince. Which ever one suits you!" he said gallantly. then he coughed out loud and held out his hands. "Rapunzel! Rapunzel let down your hair!" he said majestically. I rolled my eyes and laughed at him.

"The princess is not impressed, and besides I don't have a big hair to throw at you. So no!" I said laughingly. He gave me a puppy dog eyes and I shrugged. "Fine! I'll meet you in the front door!"

I tip toed out of my room. My subtle skills were improving. I slowly descended the stairs and gently opened the front door. Edward grabbed my hand and he took me towards his car.

"Where are we going?" I asked suspiciously.

"Shh you're going to ruin the surprise!" he said vaguely.

We stopped at a nature trail and I recoiled. "There's no way I'm hiking right now!" I said firmly. "Don't worry, I'll gladly carry you" he said smiling. "It's not that far away" he said.

I jumped out of the car, and before I could say anything, he grabbed my arm and slung me on his back. I held on to him as he started running. He must have ran for about five minutes. The rocking motion was lulling me to sleep that when he finally stopped running, Edward had to shake me awake.

When I opened my eyes I was shocked. We were in the middle of a beautiful meadow. Just by looking, I could tell that it was circular, and Edward and I were standing right in the middle.

The area was beautifully lit by the stars in the sky. I looked up and almost cried at the beauty. The moon was high up in the sky, casting shadows on the edge of the meadow. Under the pale moonlight, I could clearly see Edward's flawless face. I looked at him in wonder.

"Where are we?" I asked breathless. He smiled serenely at me and guided me down on the grass. "This is my special place. I always come here to think. I wanted to share it with you" he said gently.

He wrapped his arms around me and we laid right next to each other in silence. I looked up in to the stars and was once again breathless. There must've have been millions and millions of stars out that night. I turned my head to face Edward. He was staring at me intently, an unfathomable expression on his face.

"What?" I asked softly. He ran a finger down my cheek and paused. "Did you really mean what you said to me that day?" he said in a low voice. I looked at him in confusion. "What day?" I asked curiously. Edward smiled and looked up out to the sky.

He was quiet for a moment before he opened his mouth once again. "That day when you stood on the back of your truck and yelled out that you loved me. Did you really mean it?" he asked hesitatingly.

I knew my face was momentarily blank. I felt him stiffen when he saw the look on my face. His eyes became impassive as they looked at me.

I took a hold of his hand and kissed the back of it. "More than anything in the world" I whispered. "How about you? Did you mean it when you said you loved me too?" I asked in a small voice.

Edward's eyes reverted back to happiness as he stared at me. "More than you'll ever know" he whispered back. He touched my nose and I shivered.

"You know what would really suck?" I said slowly.

He looked at me, searching my eyes, wanting to read my mind.

"What?"

"If everything that's happened up until now had been a dream" I said in a small voice.

He tightened his hold around me and pulled me towards him. I could taste his breath in my lips as he opened his mouth to speak. "This isn't a dream" he said cockily. I felt cold chills running up and down my arms, but I raised my eyebrows anyway.

"Prove it!" I said simply. And he did.

We laid in the grass kissing until the first signs of the morning light started to brighten up our little meadow.

You know what I realized? It is so much easier sneaking out than sneaking back in. What a great way to end the week huh? Being grounded by your father until your at least fifty. But who cares? I would never have changed it for the world.

* * *

**Author's note: **

This is it for now folks. I really hope you guys enjoyed it! Please, if you have any questions to ask, don't hesitate, ask me in a review, I'll gladly collect all of the question and post a Q&A chapter. Thank you for all of you wonderful people who followed this little story. I'm sad that this part of Bella's story is ending, but guess what? It's not over yet.

YES there will be a sequel! If you think that it's a good idea, then say so, if you don't think so, then say it anyway. Thank you so much!! Please read my original fiction on fiction press, it's the same URL as my fan fiction! The extention in the end is delimarose. Please read that while your waiting for the sequel! Thanks so much for all the wonderful reviews!


	21. Acknowledgements

Hey guys!

Thank you so much for all of the reviews from last time you guys. Thank you for the support. So here are the final stats, I don't know if this is impressive, I sure as hell think so. Thank you once again!

_Reviews: 242_

_Hits:29060_

_Fav list: 110_

_Alerts: 162_

I know that throughout this story Edward had acted like the worst idiot alive, but he redeemed himself towards the end, but he wasn't the only one! LOL Bella was a bit idiotic too. For the sequel I'm ready to receive suggestions, things that you want me to put in there. The title of the sequel will be

**Diary of a secret crush: Beautiful Disaster**

I pretty much have the plotline in my head, I'm not revealing anything right now, but keep your eyes peeled. Once I've finished writing the plotline, I'll release a summary. The first chapter should be up in about a week and a half, two weeks max. Sorry guys, I have other stories I'm working on.

Please keep showing your support by reading my other story titled **crazy for you **while your waiting for the sequel. (replace the dot area with a simple . )

www**dot**fiction press**dot**com/delimarose.

It's not doing that great yet, mostly because not much people has read it. I swear you guys will definitely like it! Okay I'm starting to sound like a saddo! But all the same, please read it!

Anyway, thank you all again! You guys totally rock! Now please go and read my story, and please please please leave a review!!

Hugs and Kisses,

Rose


	22. AUTHOR'S NOTE REGARDING THE SEQUEL!

So here comes the sequel summary. Sorry for not putting it up earlier. Drop a word you guys! Tell me what you think of the summary, I'm putting this up because seriously, I'm a bit scared to put it up. I like it, but I'm not sure what all of you are thinking. So yeah, if I get a great feedback, I'll definitely have the first chapter up by tomorrow (Australian time :))

**Diary of a secret crush II: Beautiful Disaster**

Bella's just turned 18, she has a hot boyfriend who doesn't seem to mind that she's a walking hazard, and a crazy, loving best friend to boot!

Perfect life yeah?

**WRONG! **Because Edward is ready to pack up and leave…

Fast forward a few months later and Charlie has been assigned to Denali. Once again Bella finds herself in a very familiar predicament. New School, new faces, and a familiar smirky boy who had once broken her heart.

Will two foolish hearts finally realise that they are meant to be a little bit more than a beautiful disaster?

xoxoxo,

Rose


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